Two Questions to get more of what you want (and less of what you don't)

I was on Skype just staring at the screen… waiting!

She couldn’t answer the question, why was the question so hard?

This was how my conversation with one of my first coaching clients started. I was scared to death because she was a successful executive and business owner and was paying me $200 an hour for my time!

Let’s call her Katie

Now I was on the hook to help Katie answer this question!

I would call it “THE question!”

What did Katie actually want out of life?

No biggie, right? Just a little pressure! She had already achieved so much and still didn’t know.

That was 3 years ago and since we’ve helped lots of people answer that question and our prices have gone up accordingly!

Here’s the thing, I now understand why this question is so difficult to answer.

It’s too big, there’s too many variables, there’s way too much wrapped up in it (both logically and emotionally)

Most people can’t just answer it. They don’t even know where to begin, let alone make sense of it!


You can break it down into very small chunks.

What if you don’t have to figure it all out at once

(who really wants that kind of pressure anyways?)

What if instead of calling out what you “don’t want” in your job or your life, you began noticing small things in your life that you do want?

Think about what that could do for you.

it allows you to take a nearly impossible question to answer and make it possible.

It also allows you to focus on changing your life in chunks! (because big life change doesn’t actually happen overnight anyway)

So here’s one way you can do this:

Begin to pay attention to what is already happening in your life that you want MORE of:

After observing this ask these two questions
Take a watch of the video to learn these two questions that I've used for years!

for example in 2011, I noticed that I wanted more flexibility and freedom to spend time with my kids for the small things in life in the middle of the day (This was the time at Soccer Tots that I mention in the video)

Or last week when I took my daughter to the coffee shop where I do writing and had a ton of fun (and still figured out how to get work done)

I wanted more of this, so I brought my son with this week (Take your kids to work Wednesday???)

Watch the video above and then let me know what you’ve noticed in your life that you want more of in the comments below!