Why High Performers Aren’t Afraid to Ask for Help with Sarah Hawkins

There’s been a lot of talk recently about resilience.

You know what goes hand-in-hand with resilience?

Obstacles….to overcome.

Struggles….to work through.

Mental roadblocks….to disengage.

We’ve all experienced setbacks in life, but it’s about how we react to them that makes the difference between reaching our goals or letting them fall by the wayside.

When it comes to career change, many people, including High Performers, are bound to stumble on a few things before ultimately reaching their new career. Asking for help is key to getting through this!

I GUESS I JUST NEVER FOUND ANYTHING THAT I LIKED ENOUGH TO STAY WITH IT FOR A REALLY LONG PERIOD OF TIME.

SARAH HAWKINS

MEET SARAH HAWKINS

Sarah knows this story all too well.

After being out of the workforce for a good chunk of time from a physical setback, she finally decided to jump back into the daily grind.

But, like many people looking to get back into work after a long break, Sarah just didn’t know what she wanted.

Her previous job experiences didn’t seem to help her figure it out any faster as she was a self-described “dabbler.” Or what we like to call, a multipotentialite. Sarah had a lot of interests and could never narrow down what she was passionate enough to commit to full-time.

She knew that she was “capable of doing a lot, [but] just [was] not sure what the right thing [was].”

So, finally Sarah decided that she needed help figuring it out. She was asking for help.

ENTER HTYC AND THE CAREER CHANGE BOOTCAMP PROGRAM

There is something that sets High Performers apart from the rest of the world of job candidates, and that is asking for help when they don’t know how to do something.

Not being afraid and having the ability to push their egos aside to seek the help and support they need to achieve their goals.

Sarah turned to HTYC after all of her research because it just fit what she knew she needed to get her career change ball rolling.

Sarah now works as an Operations Coordinator for CASA with a promotion (and raise!) waiting for her by the end of her first year.

How’d she manage that?

She asked for help.

She proactively sought out the career change resource that fit her specific needs.

Sarah invested in the HTYC Career Change Bootcamp as a tool to not only make her dream career a reality, but also to help her negotiate her position to tailor it to her vision of what she wanted her career path to look like as she progressed.

Here are some of Sarah’s biggest takeaways from investing in the HTYC career resources:

IT’S A LOT OF SELF-REFLECTION AND HONESTY AND LOOKING AT THINGS DIFFERENTLY AND BEING WILLING TO BE OPEN TO WHAT OUR INNER SELF IS TRULY SAYING INSTEAD OF WHAT EVERYONE SAYS IT SHOULD BE.

SARAH HAWKINS
ASKING FOR HELP: DO THE WORK

There are many people, like Sarah, that know that they are capable of many things, but aren’t necessarily confident in those abilities and strengths.

Asking for help and doing the work to find your strengths, getting to know your interests, and being able to dig deep and reflect on your findings will give you the insight you need to begin making those life decisions to really hone in on what your true life and career goals are.

CHANGE YOUR MINDSET

When you do that reflective work on your strengths, experiences, and goals, you learn so much about yourself and the things that are really important to you.

The mindset change and confidence in what you are working towards almost comes naturally.

Even though you may struggle or lose your way a bit, career coaches are available to help guide you to continue to keep your momentum and get out of your own head.

Connections begin to get made and you’re on your way to your new career.

GET THE SUPPORT YOU NEED

There are perks to joining a strong community of supporters that are in a similar career transition situation that you are in.

High Performers know that surrounding yourself around the people that encourage and support you and your goals is necessary to make things happen.

You don’t have to stop dreaming about a future of what you want to do when you hit a roadblock in your process. With a career coach and a community of like-minded career-changers, you – like Sarah, can get your hope back for your future.

Once you are able to step away from your current situation to regain perspective on what you need to do to continue with your career transition, you will be able to find the resources you need and start asking for help to reach your career goals.

If you’re struggling to find the way to your new career, Career Change Bootcamp can help steer you in the right direction.

What have you got to lose?

Don’t be afraid to ask for help.

You’ll stand to gain that career happiness that we’re all out here seeking!

Check it out.

Introduction 00:00
This is the Happen To Your Career podcast, Episode 179.

Sarah Hawkins 00:07
I was called myself a dabbler. I like to do things for a little while but then when it started to get too in depth and too and you know where you'd have to be like an expert, I just lost interest or it just wasn't worth that extra step to become an expert, you know.

Scott Anthony Barlow 00:36
This is Happen To Your Career, we help you stop doing work that doesn't fit you, figure out what does and then make it happen. Whether you're looking to do your own thing, or find your dream job, you've come to the right place. I'm Scott Barlow.

Jerrad Shivers 00:59
Decided that maybe, you know, 80, 90 hour weeks and a young family doesn't necessarily go together.

Scott Anthony Barlow 01:07
Jerrad was burned out with long hours and high stress.

Jerrad Shivers 01:10
When we started to do the questionnaire and write everything down, we started our pros and cons with where we wanted to live and who wanted to be around and all that stuff.

Scott Anthony Barlow 01:19
Listen to Jerrad story later on in the episode to learn how he used coaching to help him figure out what fits him and actually make the change to work he loves.

Jerrad Shivers 01:28
I ended up with my dream job.

Scott Anthony Barlow 01:33
Hey, this is Scott Anthony Barlow, and you are listening to Happen To Your Career, the show that helps you figure out what work fits you by exploring other stories. Now we get to bring on experts like Jenny Foss, who's a career consultant who helps people define and communicate their personal brands, or people that have pretty amazing stories like Michael Bigelow, who identified as big value adds to follow a career path that he was able to grow. And these are people that are just like you, they've gone from where they are, and to what they really, really extra really want to be doing. And they are just like our next guest, because we've got a pretty special guest today, actually. And I want to tell you just a little bit about her but she's gone through and done just an absolutely amazing job of finding her dream role, and being able to make that happen. And actually, one of the coolest things here is we got to participate along the way, she took us along on this journey. So I want to introduce you to Sarah Hawkins.

Sarah 02:39
Well, I'm going to be the operations coordinator for CASA which is stands for Court Appointed Special Advocate. And so they work with trained volunteers to, they pair them with some of the children in the foster care system or that are going through the court system. They're appointed by judges to kind of pair with the child and be the voice and they advocate for the child. So the child's best interest is their only focus. So they don't care what mom wants, they don't care what dad wants, or grandma or anybody like that. They just care what's best for the child. And so it helps the judge make better decisions in terms of what's in the best interest of the child. So it's a really amazing organization. And I would be the operations coordinator, and then hopefully in the next year, so bump up to the operations manager.

Scott Anthony Barlow 03:21
In the story, you're going to hear how she went from never negotiating in her entire life, to being able to negotiate for the first time, and getting really creative with the process, even though it scared her a little bit. Also, how she had to overcome quite a few things that were both mentally challenging, and at the same time, even physically challenging in order to be able to make this transition. It's truly amazing. So listen for that in our conversation. And certainly not lastly, you're also going to hear how she thought about the process and what was holding her back and how she was able to work around that and even work with it. And I'm just really, really proud of her as she's gone through and made this transition. It is super cool. Take a listen to her story.

Sarah 04:10
So I grew up in the Central Valley of California, near Fresno. And then it's really hot here and there's no rain and no fun weather. And so I was like, I'm out and I'm never coming back. So I went to Portland where everything is lush and green and gorgeous and there's rain and I don't mind the rain in the slightest or cloudy days are invigorating for me. So I loved it there. I went to school at Lewis and Clark College and majored in psychology and loved being there, stayed about a year later, but I was not able to get my whole family to move up there, as much as I tried, and I have a big family and we're all very close and so...

Scott Anthony Barlow 04:49
You try to put them all to Portland.

Sarah Hawkins 04:51
Yeah, I really did. I almost had my parents, man, they were looking at listing but then my sister was got pregnant with their first grandchild. So they said, "sorry for not leaving now." That was unfortunate. So I shortly thereafter decided to come home just because I missed everyone and wanted to get to know my nieces and nephews as they were being born. So I'm glad I did. I mean, I married my husband, met my husband here and married him. And it's been great. So I'm glad I made that move. But I guess really, my whole career type story has been one of sort of bouncing around because I didn't know what I wanted to do. I didn't know what I wanted to spend my life doing. And I could never figure it out, you know, my dad was a CPA, my sister was a CPA. My other two sisters are amazing teachers, my brother's an awesome salesman, but I just didn't really have a thing, you know, that I felt like I was really good at, that I should pursue, you know, I was called myself a dabbler. I like to do things for a little while but then when it started to get too in depth and too, and you know, where you'd have to be like an expert, I just lost interest or it just wasn't worth that extra step to become an expert, you know.

Scott Anthony Barlow 06:09
I think we have more than a few HTYCers that can identify with that exact thing, either because you get bored or because of any number of reasons. Ready to move on to the next thing.

Sarah Hawkins 06:21
Yeah. And that's the thing with psychology, I love psychology, I think it's very interesting. But when I started getting to the upper level classes of like, really in depth stuff, I'm kind of, "I really want to do this for a living" you know, and same thing I tried teaching for a while, and it was like, okay, well, now I either need to go back to school and get a credential, or I need to find something else. Because, you know, and it was like, I don't really like this enough to go back to school again, get a whole new credential, all this more debt. So I guess I just never found anything that I liked enough to stay with it for a really long period of time. So I tended to kind of just bounce around to different things, usually falling into the office management, administrative type stuff, just because I'm really good at juggling a lot of things. And I learned really quickly. And so I tend to just do well in that kind of environment, because I'm able to help with just pretty much anything they need. But it just wasn't very satisfying, I guess, because there's just not a lot of growth in that, at least not in my path. You know, because you just kind of jump around, I did a real estate appraisal for a while. And stick either, you know, it was kind of like I did all my classes to get my credential. And it was kind of like, "do I really want to do this for the rest of my...? No, I don't." So I stopped that kind of thing. And so I felt like I kept having all these false starts, which made me feel like I wasn't really building much of a resume to where I kind of had to keep starting entry level places. So I was eventually being supportive roles to people just coming out of college, I'm in my mid 30s. And it was really disheartening because I knew I was capable of so much more.

Scott Anthony Barlow 07:56
Absolutely.

Sarah Hawkins 07:57
But I just didn't never feel like I could reach higher because I didn't have the "experience" kind of a thing. And that's where I think this course really helped me get my mind around the idea that you have traits and talents and experience that can translate across sectors and across job descriptions and all that kind of stuff. You don't necessarily have to have the same job description for 15 years to have it apply to a new position, if that makes sense.

Scott Anthony Barlow 08:25
Yeah, that makes a ton of sense. And I want to back up for just a second because the backstory is that you've gone through our career change bootcamp program. And that's what you're referring to in the course. But for everybody else here, how did you find this? How did you encounter HTYC in the first place? I'm curious.

Sarah Hawkins 08:43
I'm very anti social media, I just don't do it, not something that I'm good at and keeping up with and all that kind of things. But I finally got a LinkedIn account because I was starting to look for work, and reading all the articles and all that. And one of my contacts, I believe, posted one of your articles, talking about strengths. And I downloaded your little handbook thing on strengths and kind of a real quick, abbreviated version. And then there was an option to sign up for a webinar. So I did that and really liked what I heard in terms of finding my strengths and doing something that I love, which I kind of had expected, that just wasn't going to be an option for me because I didn't know what that was. So I kind of just expected that I was just gonna flounder around in my career for the rest of my life. So it was really settling, I guess, you know, where I'm just kind of going like, "I don't really want to" but I guess is how I kind of expected the rest of my career life to go. So it was really inspiring to think that that's not necessarily how it has to be. So I signed up for the bootcamp and been a roller coaster ride ever since.

Scott Anthony Barlow 09:44
I want to definitely talk about that. But I must super curious too, because you've kind of gone through this sort of mental switch thinking that, okay, it's got to be one or the other almost in terms of like, I just don't think that I'm going to find the stuff that I enjoy and it's going to be able to have any kind of amount of pay, and all of that stuff that so many of us think, actually, I just got a phone call just a little bit earlier today where I was talking to a guy, and he said, "Look, I want to make $200,000 a year. And I also want to have flexibility to be able to go and take my daughter to school" he's got young kids and he's like, "I don't see how I can do both." So he was almost thinking about in terms of, hey, I'm gonna have to choose between these two things, and that they cannot, absolutely under no circumstances, can be an option to do both. And we talked about amp solutions. And I don't know, consider multiple different alternatives. So super curious about your situation too and that, you know, where do you think that came from for you? Like, where do you think that you initially thought that "look, this is not ever going to be a possibility."?

Sarah Hawkins 10:49
I think maybe because I had just tried so many different things, trying to find my niche, trying to find my thing, you know, that I was made to do, and I just never found it. And I just felt like I've been looking for so long and trying for so long. And I've never been able to find it. So it must not be a possibility for me. That must be the unicorn in the woods. It's never gonna be found Bigfoot or whatever. Some people have something that they just are naturally, like, my sister knew she wanted to be a teacher when she was five. I mean, her whole life that's the all she wanted to be. And I never had that. And I looked and I tried, and I tried. And I always looked at it as a fault of mine, that maybe I was a little too ADD. I couldn't commit. I couldn't stick with anything, kind of attitude in my mind that it was my fault I couldn't find my thing. Which I don't know if you're wanting to get into this yet but that's one of the things in the course, that was just mind blowingly liberating for me, it was the term multi potentialite. Because you had a webcast on with Emily Wapnick.

Scott Anthony Barlow 11:55
Emily Wapnick. Yeah. And she's been on the podcast a couple of times, too, recently.

Sarah Hawkins 11:58
I listened to that. And I was just like, oh, I mean, I was literally running through the house, telling my husband, "I know what I am." That was just so liberating for me not to be fighting that all the time, because I felt like I was always fighting and sorry, for the multi potentialite is just somebody that likes to do a lot of different things, and they're good at a lot of different things. And they don't just have one little niche. And I guess I'd never heard of it in a positive frame before and just like...

Scott Anthony Barlow 12:30
That was sound negative, right? Like, I know I just have that association, it's, "oh, it's bad to be a dabbler."

Sarah Hawkins 12:35
You just can't commit to anything, you can't stick with it. And so soon as it's not fun, or whatever you bolt, and that's not what I wanted. But at the same time, I'm the type that when I'm not mentally engaged, I just die inside. I mean, like my whole soul just withers up if I'm not like mentally challenged and engaged and excited about something. And so I could only stick with something for so long before I could feel the deadening start. And so I realized that, well, it's because I need to be doing different things, the way I'm wired. And so whether I'm doing that on a personal side to kind of help with, if I'm sticking with a career, then do different things on my own, or try to do different things within a role to try to feed that need for newness and challenge and you know, all that kind of stuff so that I don't get the deadening. And it was just really a liberating thing for me to embrace it instead of fight against it. And just like when she said some of the superpowers of, I think I listened to her TED Talk. And she had said, one of the superpowers of a multi potentialite is rapid learning, super adaptable, and there was another one where they can merge ideas. And I am definitely a rapid learner. I'm definitely super adaptable. But I never necessarily looked at those are strengths. And I never looked at that as a benefit to being the way I was. So just kind of having that all tied together was just, I mean, really, I was on cloud nine for like days, just kept telling my husband, "I know what I am" I was like, you have no idea. I mean, it was just something that I mean, it was never really spoken other than I would just say I'm a dabbler, I don't, you know, but to have it verbalized by someone else and explained and treated positively, was just a huge leap for me in thinking about what's possible in the future.

Scott Anthony Barlow 14:27
That's so interesting. And a little bit of backstory for everybody listening too, within career change bootcamp, we have guest instructors come on about once a month-ish or so. And we've had Emily Wapnick, who's also been on the podcast come and do a session specifically for that group that's gone through career change bootcamp. And that's what Sarah is referring too when, there's one of the pieces that happens to be in there. But I feel like that's a big part of what we do and when we're working with people is really just, actually, almost everything that we do is just people align who they actually are with their work and understanding the ways to do that, because that's a lot of what I just heard you say is, "hey, wait, this is actually a good thing that I am this way." And there is and are ways to be able to use that to your advantage.

Sarah 15:17
Yeah, and embracing it will make me happier and more fulfilled if I embrace it instead of trying to fight it. And I think that's what I've been doing my whole life is trying to fight it. And that's something that needed to be disciplined out of me kind of a thought process. And I was just never very successful at doing that. So yeah, just really, I'll be happier if I can just embrace who I was created to be. And that's a good thing.

Scott Anthony Barlow 15:42
That is so so cool. And I feel like eventually get to have that mental switch that you're talking about where they flip over and start thinking about what they do or who they are, or some of the things that they offer as a positive and start going with the grain rather than against the grain. That's what the easiest way to describe it. But that is something that we, in a variety of different ways, it doesn't always happen the same way. It's not watching the Emily Wapnick video necessarily, or whatever else it might be but that is our personal goal is to have everybody have that moment.

Sarah 16:14
Right. And I think you guys provide so many different ways to make that happen, or to at least facilitate that happening. I do think it does take somebody willing to do the inner reflection and the work. And it's not something where you're just going to sign up, and then somebody from Happen To Your Career is going to tell you what your perfect job is. And you know what I'm saying, it's not something that you guys necessarily provide as much as you guys facilitate. And so the person that is wanting the answers needs to do the work to figure it out. And it's a lot of self reflection, it's a lot of self honesty, it's a lot of looking at things the way you may be having in the past, and being willing to be open to what is your inner self really truly saying to you, and not just what you hear everybody else saying it should be. And I just think that's an important component. And I think you guys are really good at facilitating that.

Jerrad Shivers 17:14
Literally made me sick, the anxiety, the stress that I was under.

Scott Anthony Barlow 17:20
Jerrad's job was obviously not a fit for him.

Jerrad Shivers 17:25
Decided that maybe you know, 80, 90 hour weeks, and a young family doesn't necessarily go together. So I knew I needed help. And I knew I wasn't gonna be able to do this by myself.

Scott Anthony Barlow 17:36
So Jerrad came to us looking for help and found that in one on one coaching.

Jerrad Shivers 17:41
You can let life happen to you, or you can happen to your life.

Scott Anthony Barlow 17:45
As we worked with him, Jerrad and his wife really had to figure out what they really actually want in their life.

Jerrad Shivers 17:52
When we started to do the questionnaire and write everything down, we started our pros and cons with, where we wanted to live and who we wanted to be around and all that stuff. All those things added up over time in the final discussions of, okay, well, this is what I can do, this is what I can't do, this is what I need to do, this is how much travel I'll do my job and how much time I will spend you know, during the week, the immune to the concessions that I can make, what are the concessions you can't make and all that, we've kind of just all... is piled on to the end.

Scott Anthony Barlow 18:22
Jerrad did phenomenal job, not just designing the life and career that he actually wanted but then taking the steps to make that happen.

Jerrad Shivers 18:30
I ended up with my dream job.

Scott Anthony Barlow 18:33
Congratulations to Jerrad on finding work that he loves and fits his family's needs, at the same time. If you want help to figure out what work fits you and find that fulfilling career that lights you up and gives you purpose, find out how coaching can help you step by step, go to happentoyourcareer.com and click on coaching to apply, or pause this and text MY COACH to 44222 that's TEXT MY COACH to 44222. We'll send over the application quicker than two shakes of a lamb's tail or however that goes.

Scott Anthony Barlow 19:17
What caused you to want to make this last most recent change?

Sarah Hawkins 19:22
Well, I have had some really horrendous health problems. It's been the last 20 years but the last 10 to 12 have been exceptionally difficult, resulting in me needing to leave the workforce because I couldn't walk anymore and it was in tons of pain and bedridden for at least a year, probably closer to two. And it was a really bad, I mean pretty much praying to die kind of scenario. And so I had eventually come to the realization that I will never work again, you know, I can't even walk and I'm in so much pain. It's not like a wheelchair would help, I thought about that. And so, my husband had his own business. And so miraculously, I found a solution to my health problems. And it's a long recovery process but I've already made so many leaps and bounds back to life that I felt being called to go back to work. And so I had been helping my husband probably the last year or two in his business, but it's not anything I'm really interested in, it was just a way to help contribute to the family. But I was kind of at a place where it's time to go back to work out of the house, which was very scary, because I had to leave under the conditions of, I can't physically do this anymore, which was really hard for me, because I always take a lot of pride in my ability to pretty much handle what anybody needs to have to gradually be saying, "No, I can't do that. I can't do that. I can't do that" until eventually, I had to come home and lay in bed all day, for a year or two, was a really, really difficult thing mentally for me and emotionally. And so it was extremely daunting to try to think about trying to get back into the workforce but it also gave me an opportunity to think about what do I want to do, because I kind of had this unique time where I'm not needing to report to another job, really, I mean, I'm working with my husband but there's a lot of flexibility in that. And so I had the opportunity to really just kind of try to figure it out because when I started trying to look for a job, gosh, it was so disheartening, it was just so hard to get your resume in anywhere. And my resume I knew was too vague, but it was because I didn't know what I wanted to do. And so I just threw everything I've ever done on there, to see if it appealed to somebody that could then approached me with an opportunity that maybe I would want, you know, because I didn't know what I wanted. And so it was really hard to tailor a resume. And so I started looking around trying to find services that could help me figure out what I wanted to do. And you know, was reading all these articles on LinkedIn, and Glassdoor and everywhere else just trying to figure out, what do I ever want to do? You know, because the idea of going back to just being an admin was just so, I just didn't want to do it. It was just like, I told my husband, "I know I need to, I just don't want to at all" you know, and it's that's not any way you want to start a new job, just something that you just are doing just to make ends meet, and you don't want to do it. So that's kind of what started me on the path of finding you guys was I was searching, you know, I'd contacted a few resume writer people and just said, "I'm looking for somebody that can help me figure out what it is that I shouldn't be doing. I'm capable of doing a lot, but I just don't know what the right thing is. And I need help." And most of them were like, "Oh, well, once you know what you want to do, we can help you tailor your resume." So I was kind of stuck. I didn't know where to turn, which was why it was so awesome when I found you guys, because I was like, "Oh, this is what I need. I know this is what I need. And I don't know how they're going to get me there. But I believe that they will." And so that's kind of what prompted the career change was getting back into the market after being out. I think I've been gone for four years from outside employment. And you know, prior to that I was seriously struggling. So work in general has a kind of a painful connotation for me.

Scott Anthony Barlow 23:31
I didn't realize the whole story. That is... it's amazing, actually.

Sarah Hawkins 23:34
It was definitely daunting, definitely scary. That's what I would tell everybody when they're like, "you're looking for a job" and I'm like, "yeah, I'm terrified. But I feel like this is what I'm supposed to be doing. So I'm gonna do it and just trust that it's gonna work out." So that's kind of how I got here.

Scott Anthony Barlow 23:50
When you got into the bootcamp then, you started going through and really trying to figure out what it was that you wanted to be doing. What was the hardest part of that process?

Sarah Hawkins 23:59
I think I still had some limitations in my mind just because of my physical issues that are on their way to being better, but aren't quite better yet. So I knew I was capable of certain things but I wasn't necessarily confident in my ability to do what maybe I felt like I really wanted to do. So I did the work of going through to figure out my strengths, which was awesome. But it was hard. There was a lot of times that when I first looked at one of the tasks, I would just go "oh, I don't know" you know, I don't know. And so I really had to dig deep I guess, and really just sit with it for a while and think about it. And when I was going to the grocery store, thinking about it, when I was working thinking about it, so that I could kind of really forced myself to answer the question as if I was in like a classroom or something and the teacher was waiting for an answer. I've got to come up with something. And so I would start and then before I know it, their thing would be full or it would be multiple pages, you know, where I was like, "oh, wow, I had a lot more in there than I thought" I think you had to stopped when you're as unhealthy as I was, and as sick as I was, you stop dreaming, number one, and you stop hoping for your future, number two. So for a really long time, I have stopped dreaming about a future or dreaming about what I wanted to do, or even just like traveling or anything like that, you just can't allow yourself to go there. Because where you are, you just feel like that will never happen. So it's just disappointment in store if you dream, so you just kind of shut it off. And so it was a really hard thing for me to start it up again, and start thinking about like, "Okay, if I could do anything, what would it be?" Because that's not been an option for me, and probably 20 plus years, if I could do anything, because in my mind, I'm like, "Well, I can't do anything." So I have to temper it with what I'm physically able to do. And so that was really hard for me, I think, kind of getting out of that mindset of, there's a lot of limitations on me. And realizing that okay, not as many as there used to be and it won't always be this way anymore. You know, my kind of getting my hope back for my future.

Scott Anthony Barlow 26:11
That's a massive, like most people it takes like 15 years sometimes to go through that type of mindset shift, I'm going to call it, for lack of better phrase right now.

Sarah Hawkins 26:20
Oh, yeah.

Scott Anthony Barlow 26:21
That's huge.

Sarah Hawkins 26:21
Yeah, it was for me. I mean, it really made a big difference. And I really learned a lot about myself in terms of, I always knew I wanted to help people like that was something I knew was always something I liked. But it wasn't until I really looked down at all my jobs, and all my projects, and all that kind of stuff, where we have to write down what was kind of the thing I loved about each of those, that I saw the theme. Wow, I really like helping people. It's really important to me, because that's the thing I loved about everything I've ever done, but I didn't ever really make that connection before. And so for me, my dream was always back when I was healthier, but my dream was always that when I retire, I would love to go do disaster relief, like hands on helping people at their worst time. But that's a very physical thing. And so I had kind of written that off as well, uh, well. And so I think when I was talking to Lisa, who's one of the bootcamp coaches, I had called her because it was the time to figure out what kind of companies you want to do approach. And I had no clue. So I knew what my strengths were now, which was great, but I still had no clue what I wanted, or what would be a good fit for me. And I mean, I had like pages of possible careers that I was like, I don't know, I mean, maybe this would work, maybe this would work, you know. And so I think she called it my runaway train of a mind of just being like, well, there's this, I mean, they were all over the place. Part of that multi potentialite thing, you know, where it was just like, well, I could be a writer, or I could be a logistics operator, or, you know, it was just like all over the place. And so she kind of helped me zero. And I actually said out loud, which I didn't expect, but I said, "well, my dream job would be disaster relief, or something like that with nonprofit." And she was like, "Okay, hold on. Then why are you looking at all these other things?" And I said, "Well, I can't do that. I can't do disaster relief, I'm physically not able." But then she kind of helped me steer me in the right direction of, "okay, but then there's other things you can get into, that can still fulfill that part of you, maybe in the nonprofit world that you can be making a really big positive difference in people's lives, that isn't as physical, maybe look in those areas." And so that's what I did. That's how I got this job, you know, I've never even really considered nonprofit before, it just was never even anything in my radar.

Scott Anthony Barlow 28:45
Super, super cool. And one of the things that I know behind the scenes too, is that not only did you go through the interview process and going from deciding that, hey, nonprofit, for me, could be an option. But then you ended up getting the job and negotiating for the first time, is what I understood. Is that right?

Sarah Hawkins 29:05
Yes, I've never ever in my life negotiated a salary, a position, anything, I was always of the mind, which part of it and I don't necessarily know where it comes from other than maybe my health problems. I mean, those started probably in fourth grade. And I had a hip replacement in my freshman year of college. And so there's just been a lot of things that just, I think kind of whittled away my competence. And so generally when I would get a job, I was just so grateful that they picked me, that I didn't want to rock the boat. I didn't want to look ungrateful, I didn't want to look greedy. I mean, a lot of the things that are typical, but I just never, ever would dream of negotiating. And so you guys kind of gave me the confidence that it's okay and you can go about it the right way that there aren't bad feelings, and I definitely stressed about it ahead of time, but I did it because I felt like I needed to push my in that way and try. And if it didn't work out, then that probably wasn't the organization for me anyway. And so I did, and they were very receptive and did what they could. And we ended up kind of restructuring the job title. And...

Scott Anthony Barlow 30:16
They really manage it well.

Sarah Hawkins 30:19
Yes. That was the job...

Scott Anthony Barlow 30:20
You are a manager but we're tweaking some stuff so that you can set it up, so that you can get increase a little bit later on, right?

Sarah Hawkins 30:29
Yeah. So the job I was interviewing for was operations manager. And so when the salary came in low, I came back and just said, "Well, this is what I was hoping for" I, you know, kind of did your script and said, you know, "what can we do to bring this up, you know, to get closer to what I'm, you know, looking for?" And so they said, "Well, honestly, not much." And there was a variety of reasons for that. But they said, "Well, let us talk about it and see what we can do." And so they called me back and said, "Well, you know, they bumped it up slightly, this opening salary" but then they said, "what we would do is actually demote your title." At first, you're kind of like, "ah, what?"

Scott Anthony Barlow 31:03
Wait, hold on. No, no.

Sarah Hawkins 31:05
Like, "I'm sorry." Negotiated. But they said, "we'll demote your title. And then in a year, that opens you up, puts you on a path that you can then get a promotion to operations manager" which they would be able to give me a larger bump in salary with a promotion, than they would be able to do within the same role as like either a starting salary or a raise.

Scott Anthony Barlow 31:29
Based on their infrastructure and their board of directors and everything else like that. Hey, by the way, when you quick piece of advice, because I know from doing this a lot that based on how you've gone into it, you might even be able to do that earlier than a year, when you get a chance, go back into the career change bootcamp, go login and search for one of the bonuses that comes with it, which is get a raise guide, and it'll guide you through the process, potentially even do that earlier. Or go outside of the boundaries for what the "policies" or pay bounds or everything else like that is too. So small tidbit.

Sarah Hawkins 32:09
Yeah. Thank you. That'd be great.

Scott Anthony Barlow 32:10
Yeah.

Sarah Hawkins 32:11
That worked out. I'm happy. I felt like they were willing to work with me. And they're excited about having me come on board. And that was a scary thing for me too but I was thinking, well, I don't know, if I just barely edged out someone else. I mean, I have no idea. And then if I'm being difficult, are they gonna then just go with their number two. And so that was something that was really difficult, really hard for me to just kind of trust that I can handle this, and I can do it in such a way that I don't appear difficult. And...

Scott Anthony Barlow 32:40
A roller coaster that you end up going through the end, you're like, "Yes, I want this job, cuz it's awesome. I don't want it to go away. Like what if I... what if they're gonna...? Yeah.

Sarah Hawkins 32:51
When I talked to Lisa, on our negotiation call, she was like, "so how are you feeling?" And I said, "honestly, I just, I had really hoped that there would just be one piece of this that wasn't so hard." You know, I didn't have to sit there and negotiate or I didn't have to, you know, because it was just something I really didn't want to do. So it was just kind of it really took the excitement of the roll out of it for me that I was going to have to negotiate, you know, because I was like, hey, I got an offer. But then I was like, oh, they're gonna make me negotiate. I was like, you know, it was really, a roller coaster is a perfect way to put it. I was happy, and then I was devastated, and that I was scared. And I mean, it was just all over the place. But I put my...

Scott Anthony Barlow 33:28
But you've just done it.

Sarah Hawkins 33:29
Yeah. Anyway... So..

Scott Anthony Barlow 33:31
That is so...

Sarah Hawkins 33:32
And now I've done it. So next time, it won't be so scary.

Scott Anthony Barlow 33:35
Exactly. Now you can do it for the whole rest of your life, as it turns. Hey, congratulations, again, by the way, like that is just super, super cool. I knew part of the story but I don't know the whole thing. And that is just what you've done is, actually a lot of the things that you've done, are things that most people won't do over their entire life. So I think that's something to be proud of, personally.

Sarah Hawkins 33:56
Thank you.

Scott Anthony Barlow 33:57
Yeah, well, I just got to say thank you so much for letting us play a small part in it, and for letting us push you a little bit. And clearly, it's turned out really, really well for you. And thanks for making the time to be able to come on and share your story with other people too, because I think that there's so much that other people will take from this and our listeners, because they're facing those same types of problems, the same exact things that you have. So it just means a lot. I appreciate it.

Sarah Hawkins 34:24
Oh, thank you so much for having me. I was happy to do it.

Scott Anthony Barlow 34:35
Hey, Sarah's story made me incredibly happy. And partially because she got to bring us along for the journey and we got to see as she went through every single step and it was so much fun. And I just wanted to say thanks for taking a listen and thank you to all the people that have gone over and taken the time and given us some feedback on iTunes, on Stitcher Radio really, really, really appreciate that. I want to read yet another five star review coming from iTunes. This is by LSF72. And it say "wow, finally some career help that makes sense. I've read what color's your parachute, and this is much, much better." Thank you so much for taking the time, and comparing us to the one of the classics. And that means an awful lot. Hey, we have plenty more for you coming up next week on Happen To Your Career, I want you to take a listen to what we've got in store right now.

35:42
I wanted to kind of circle back and speak to just regular people and make an impact in the world. But for quite a while I had to sort of borrow down and do the true sort of full on academic thing. But I now spend a lot more of my time trying to actually use academic research almost as r&d for products and the products are articles and books and training programs and things that actually make a difference in people's lives.

Scott Anthony Barlow 36:09
All that plenty more next week, right here on Happen To Your Career. I will see you then. Until then, I'm out. Adios.

Scott Anthony Barlow 36:32
And I thought was really cool. And we'll talk about that a little bit later is part of how you went through and negotiated, you ended up structuring that opportunity to probably happen sooner rather than normal as well, which I thought was pretty cool. So I'll ask you about that a little bit later. I know that you sent a couple emails and Lisa, a couple emails too about how excited you were about this particular organization. And after learning a little bit about what they do, I think it's pretty fantastic too. So congratulationss, first of all, let me just say that.

Sarah Hawkins 37:02
Thank you.

Scott Anthony Barlow 37:03
I emailed you a congratulations. But I haven't actually gotten to tell you. So this is awesome.

Sarah Hawkins 37:07
Oh, thank you. I'm excited.

Scott Anthony Barlow 37:09
So here's my question, though, because, alright, now you're going to... you're going to go and next week be able to start that job with an organization that you're really excited about but that's only been really recently. So I'm curious a little bit about your background, and how all this happened, what led up to here in the first place. And I would love to start with, what caused you to move down this path in the first place? Because you went to school in Portland, right?

Sarah Hawkins 37:34
Yes.

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JOB APPLICATIONS: How High Performers Get Results with Scott Barlow and Lisa Lewis

It’s interesting that really smart, really talented, really capable people still make some of the same mistakes or hit some of the same stumbling blocks that folks in all the other professions and doing all kinds of applications do.

Lisa Lewis

Most people dread the job application process as they try and stand out in a sea of people who are just as qualified and just as hungry to make it through the first portion of the process: the weeding out phase.

Surprisingly, even the “most skilled” people struggle to get their foot in the door when applying for jobs.

But, there is a little population of the workforce that usually doesn’t have that problem. This group of people are the High Performers – the people who get the early promotions, the big raises, and the exceptional treatment.

While the rest of the world goes into the job application process with the mindset of getting the job, high performers go into the process with the mindset of using this phase to collect as much information about the job, the organization, and the culture of the organization to determine if this is a good fit for them.

High Performers are not wedded to the idea of getting the job because they want to be sure that when they apply for the job that it is for a role at an organization that fits their strengths, skills, and values.

To avoid some of the same obstacles many people hit as they apply for jobs, you’ll have to look at the process from a different perspective and try and fight some of the typical, traditional best practices you’ve heard throughout your career.

Your goal is standing out among the other job applicants by submitting a quality application and not just repeatedly hitting the submit button on every job listing with the same exact resume. We’ve developed a template to help you out, download it here!

HOW DO YOU DIFFERENTIATE YOURSELF FROM GOOD TO GREAT?

Everyone sending in a job application is looking for the same end-result: to get the meeting…to land that interview.

There are 3 key principles that separate the High Performers from the rest of the job candidates when beginning the job application process.

High Performers:

  • Do the upfront research work
  • Contact someone at organization before applying for the position
  • Make sure their research shines through in their application

Now, let’s get started on how to apply these steps to your job application, so you can start getting better results and standing out immediately!

STEP ONE: UPFRONT WORK

You’re probably wondering what this means. Doing the upfront work before applying for a job simply means doing your research not only on the potential job position and organization, but also on yourself.

The goal is to determine if this role is the right fit for your life.

First, do your research on the organization. Look at what the organization looks like: their core values, their goals, their structure, are they upholding their values in the day-today, etc.

Then, ask yourself:

When you take the time to research the organization and answer these questions for yourself, it will take you closer to determining if it is even worth your time to apply for this particular position.

And if you discover that it isn’t a position or organization that you want to work for, then you can cross it off your list and move on to the next!

STEP TWO: CONTACT SOMEONE AT ORGANIZATION

One of the biggest differentiators of High Performers is the fact that they go beyond the first step and continue their research on the organization by establishing the best point of contact and putting an added effort into reaching out to people in the organization to get more answers before they apply.

There is only so much you can learn about an organization online that in order to get beneath the surface, contacting someone for ‘intel’ on what the organization is really like will help determine if this is still the right fit for you.

WONDERING HOW TO GO ABOUT REACHING OUT TO SOMEONE?

The best way is to go for the ‘low-hanging’ fruit.

Do you know someone that knows someone that works for the organization in question?

If you do, write out that introduction email for your connection to make it easier for them to connect you to their contact. (Side note: High Performers think steps ahead to make it easier to get a, “Yes, I’d be happy to connect you!” from anyone they are requesting an ask from)

It’s okay if you don’t.

Don’t be afraid to reach out and have a conversation, even if it is a fresh introduction.

It’s important to get a sense of what the organization looks like from the inside (company culture, team dynamics, leadership, growth potential, struggles, etc.) to compare that to what you need to be happy in your career.

Here’s an example of an email with a quick intro and ask:

Sending a quick intro email like the one above will help you stand out as someone that is genuinely interested in the organization. It shows your hustle and commitment to learning more and it shows that you’re taking your job application seriously. To save this email, download our template here!

This will also help showcase all of the thoughtfulness in the research that you’ve already done. Just be sure to ask questions that can’t be answered by researching online.

STEP THREE: STANDING OUT AND HOW TO APPLY WITH INTENTION

Now that you’ve gathered all of the information you need and have determined that this is a job that you want, it’s time to follow through with a strong application.

You want to make your application compelling. You want the person reviewing it to like you, feel like they know you, and most of all you want them to trust you.

Your application should exhibit how you’ve invested your time, energy, effort, and enthusiasm for the potential job.

Make your application as relevant to the job description and organization as possible.

Be specific in how your strengths and skills can benefit the organization and how your talents will bring value to the role.

Be the dream candidate for the job in your application.

Taking the time to go through these 3 simple steps will not only save you the lost opportunity cost of sending in an application for a job you won’t even want, but these steps will also enhance your “job application” to a more strategic marketing document that will make you and your strengths more relevant to the job and organization and help you in standing out to a hiring manager.

And no matter where you are in your career search, if you need help, support, or more direction with your job search, we’ve got the solution for you! Just apply for our coaching and we’ll set you up with one of our career coaches that can help set you up on the right track to get the results you’re looking for.

Head on over to www.happentoyourcareer.com/coaching to work with one of our coaches and figure out your new career!

Also be sure to download our networking email template if you haven’t already!

EPISODE LINKS AND RESOURCES
GUEST: SARAH HAWKINS

Scott Barlow: In this week’s episode we are doing something different. We try to practice what we preach and get outside the comfort zone. We had an interesting experience over the last 30 days or so because we’ve been hiring a couple people. In the past we’ve hired people and we’ve noticed a few things. Some things we’ve seen all over the world when people go to apply for a job. I have with me today a special guest. You’ve heard her on past episodes like episode 147 where you can hear her entire story. I’d recommend that. It’s one of our most popular episodes. Welcome back Lisa Lewis. How are you?

Lisa Lewis: Hi I’m great. How are you Scott?

Scott Barlow: So good. Before we hit the record button we were chatting and talking through some of the interesting phenomenon about how high performers apply for jobs and how the rest of the world applies. That is what we are going to talk about during this episode because there is such a disparity and it’s ridiculous. Just last week we had you up here to Moses Lake, Washington. Our home base because we love it. We were talking in detail about how it is so interesting that one of the positions we had open was a career coach position and you would think that for a career coach position you would see model applicants the entire way, especially since we have been fortunate to have talented and intelligent people apply to our jobs. I’ve observed that even career coaches don’t know how to do some of these things in the best way. It was an indicator for us that if career coaches don’t even know how to do it that everybody else probably needs to know how to do it too. What would you add?

Lisa Lewis: It’s interesting that really smart, talented, and capable people still make some of the mistakes that people in all professions do. It was a great indicator that there are key principles that differentiate the good from the great. If you can identify and incorporate and practice these in your application process you will be able to distinguish yourself without doing a huge amount of effort, but with fighting natural tendencies or traditional best practices you’ve heard about. I’m excited to dive in and talk about what we saw even in career coach applications that differentiated the stars from the typical applicants that everyone listening can use immediately for better results.

Scott Barlow: That puts the pressure on us to make sure we present it well. On that note, what we’d love to take you through is how to go through and get the results you want. What do most people want to get? An interview or meeting, right? That is the whole purpose of applying. As it turns out there is more than one way to get to that meeting or interview in the first place. Hang tight and we’ll get into that. I love how you put it in terms of we’ve got what the rest of the world is doing and then a tiny portion that is in this high performer category doing it completely differently.

Lisa Lewis: I want to jump in and say that you articulated that the point of applying is getting an interview. I think that might be a place where our philosophy and our success with our top performers may be different from what an average person may think. I think so often people say they are doing the application to get the job. The key thing different from people that are stars is that they are not completely wedded to the idea of getting the job. They want to see if the job, role, and culture is a good fit for them and then use that data to decide if they want the job. But we’ll get to that.

Scott Barlow: Yes all that and more. Let’s dive into that point. I think it’s a great kicking off point to help people understand what happens first. We spend a lot of time teaching people to do this. It’s part of the reason, that even though we have a ton of coaching applications, we are interested in taking great coaches and bringing them to the team and making them the best in the world. It’s hard to teach and practice this when there are other pressures.

Particularly this first step of determining what you want. Does the role even line up with something that is worthwhile spending my time on? As it turns out there is upfront work to do instead of jumping right to the application. Is this even a fit? If it isn’t why on earth would you waste a ton of time going through the application process? You can hit the button on Indeed or LinkedIn to apply or other places but we find that is rarely effective for people because so many other people are doing it too and it comes through as junk. Being on the opposite end when you get a ton of applications that way it’s just like junk. You end up moving through it quickly to the ones that are going to stand out. When people do stand out it is drastic. How do we answer what is the right upfront work to do to determine if it’s a good fit and why is that worthwhile?

Lisa Lewis: It’s a great question. One of the things we talked about a lot is when you are determining if it is a fit you have to be clear on things for yourself. What are my signature strengths and how I can best help an organization achieve their goals? An organization does not care about you, they care about what you can to for them. What are the ways I can help serve and solve interesting problems and what problems do they have that my strengths can help? You have to do a huge part of this research upfront. That can be researching the organization and what services and products they offer. It can be looking at their core values and the press around them. What media coverage have they gotten recently? Are they upholding their values in how they interact with the media? You can look at things like glassdoor.com to see real testimonials about what the organization looks like to see if they are walking the talk. They can have glossy values on their website but may not be using them in real life in how they treat employees, opportunities, room to grow, and autonomy.

I think starting out and getting a sense of what the organization looks like and what you need to be happy is a huge first step to take before applying. I know that can feel counterintuitive when you’ve found the job posting and it’s been posted for 12 days. Your brain goes into panic that it could go offline tomorrow and you’ll miss the opportunity so you have to get it in right now and there is temptation to shortcut or bypass the process but that can undermine your application because it will come off as being unsearched, casual, or hurried. For top people that take the time to do this top level of investigation to determine if it’s a good fit for both sides they can sometimes get the rules of the application changed for them.

Scott Barlow: I’ve been that person that has got that changed for me in the past. I’ve had two roles that were phenomenal fits for me. They were my dream jobs at the time and they were both drastic exceptions. I can share those stories if we have the time. I think something critical to answer is what are you actually researching and looking for? How does that translate into whether that is a fit? It can be proverbial minefield. It’s cushy and you have to sort it out. If you want to you can go to past episodes on figuring out what fits you or our audio course on what fits you podcast to go through that process. You can search on iTunes and you’ll see the audio course to help you with that.

For the sake of this discussion we are going to assume you already know what is important to you. After you know that I look for who actually works there. Do those people have similar values to you? Do you want to hang around them? What are the most important pieces to you? Sometimes it means you may need to reach out to people in the organization. Pushback: But it’s going to take so much time. It will only take like 15 minutes to reach out and 15 minutes for the conversation. That half hour can save a lot of time if you get an interview or more importantly save the time of doing an application that takes a ton of time and then never even hearing back from them. What would you add?

Lisa Lewis: If we were to take it to three key things you need to do, the first is doing the upfront research to ensure it is a good fit before you get started. The second is contacting someone at the organization before you apply. It’s important because there is only so much information you can get on the internet. Glassdoor can give you great feedback and testimonials but it’s often people leaving an organization and that feedback can be much different than people working there currently about culture, team dynamics, direction of the organization, growth potential, and leadership.

Getting an opportunity to talk to someone before you apply even if they aren’t a hiring manager or in the exact department you want to be in can still give you valuable information about what the company is excelling at or struggling with right now. You can use that to differentiate how you are a key fit for the organization because you have way more secret inside information about what they are looking for and need. Is what you see what you get? Is what they have in the job posting matching exactly what they are looking for? Maybe there is a nuance. Maybe the position you are looking at is to fill for a manager who is running their team into the ground and they need someone in who is a leader and who has a vision to develop the team. You can use that information to tailor how you promote yourself which may be differently if you just went on the application or research alone.

Scott Barlow: This is what we teach to people when we are doing coaching or when enrolled in Career Change Boot Camp. There is are many ways to do this. I want to give you a couple examples of how to reach out to people in that case.

Let’s take the situation you described at the beginning and say I want to reach out to other people, not maybe the hiring manager, but I want to find out what people in similar departments or who work for the organization think about it and what I can learn. Let’s talk through an example of how to do that. One thing that jumps to mind is being able to go for the low hanging fruit first. You may already know someone who can make the introduction. When you have that it’s easier to make it happen. It can happen quick depending on your relationships. The stronger the relationship the more weight it’s going to carry. It could be as simple as dropping an email to your friend or text saying do you know such and such at xyz corporation. I’m interested in learning about one of their open roles. If they say yes that is fantastic and you can proceed.

One suggestion I make is if you are having someone introduce you to someone else, let’s say in an email, I’d go as far as writing the email for them. Make it super easy so they can just hit the send button if they want. It could be “Hey I wanted to introduce you to Lisa Lewis who has a track record of ten years of experience in marketing and she has worked as a career coach at HTYC and she is interested in what you do over here. I was wondering if you’d spend 15 minutes with her to tell her more about the organization.” It might be very easy to put that together. If I as the introducing party have to think about it I might want to do it but prioritize it lower. High performers are taking all the steps to make it easy for it to happen. Think a step ahead and make it super easy for each person to say yes. What would you add?

Lisa Lewis: I think that is a fabulous point. I want to talk about an example. Even if you have a direct line of access to that person why it is still so critical to contact that person before you apply. When we were posting our career coach opening on the team I posted it in this community of badass ladies that I belong to. Out of the ten messages that I got only one person wanted to talk to me before they sent in the application. The rest were little Facebook chats saying I just applied for this or asking for information about the position. These are tough to respond to and low priority for me to help. It doesn’t tell me who you are or why you applied. I can’t be an advocate for you easily. It’s not helping your candidacy the way you want or hope.

Scott Barlow: What you said is that it will differentiate you from everyone else that applied and didn’t do anything but it won’t differentiate you to help me get to know you or like you. I might remember your name when I’m looking through everything but it doesn’t help me get to trust you or give me any reasons on how I might make a hiring decision knowing all the skills are there and that you can do the job. How can you go further and do that part of the process differently so you can distinguish between point A and point B that we described? How can we make a drastic difference so people can know, like, and trust you?

Lisa Lewis: If you want to take an opportunity, like t-ball where you know the person and can get in touch with them easily and turn it into a home run, the way to do it is to reach out to them to show that you have been thoughtful and done your research and done the upfront work. Ask them specific questions you couldn’t answer yourself via research. Something like, hey I read the job description, and tell them the steps you went through, how you looked at the website, saw past testimonials, and you see it’s an amazing place to work. Tell them I saw the organization’s values on line but I wanted to get a sense for how they actually honor those in day to day life and what a typical day on the team would look like. Would you have ten to fifteen minutes to chat on the phone or in person, or skype, to get an idea of what working at the organization might look like or how one can get their foot in the door?

That note leaves such an impression because it shows you are willing to hustle and do your side of the work to make it easy for them to help you. It’ll show you think they have a perspective that you may not be able to get from someone else. That feels nice to receive so they are delighted to help you and be an advocate for you. It gives me a good sense of when we have the conversation the level of performance you are coming in with. If you are willing to do that hustle up front I can only imagine how you will hustle once you are on the team.

Scott Barlow: Think about the subtle cues going into that, some you called out like I’m already acknowledging that a bunch of stuff is on the website and that you’ve done the research, you are cueing that you couldn’t find some stuff but are legitimately curious about it. Humans respond to curiosity especially if the interest is relevant to the person on the receiving end. There are more opportunities for that.

One of the people we hired out of this last round for a partnerships position had attended one of our trainings and been through the backlogs of the podcast episodes. She pulled out several obscure facts that would only be known by someone doing their research and related it specifically to me in the email. Another example is we do the puzzle method you’ve heard on the podcast. She referenced that within one of the emails and that showed me that she had done the research and that she cared about what it was that we do versus just an initial outlook on how the company seems to line up. There is a drastic difference, fill in the gaps Lisa.

Lisa Lewis: The difference of taking the research and turning that into something that is compelling to the person who may or may not be looking at your application. One more story. With this round of career coach applications we had every intention of closing down the process and had someone who reached out personally to say hey I’d love to chat with you before I send in my application to see if it’s a good fit. Because of that conversation we changed the application process to pull that person in. They were impressive with their research and thoughtful questions. They showed they really cared and were willing to take the time to wait and get it right before sending in the application. Contacting someone prior to applying can change the application process to pull you in where you may not have been able to. It’s an investment of time, effort, and hustle upfront that can have serious dividends long term.

Scott Barlow: It’s not a one time thing either. I’ve been on the end of conversations arguing with the hiring manager as the HR and recruiter who wants to close the thing and they had been contacted or recently heard of someone else they thought was a phenomenal fit. We’ve had that argument in the background and made the decision that it was the right thing to do to keep it open, or reopen it, or let them apply through the backend, or escape the process and not apply at all. Which cues up the next thing.

Sometimes what happens with high performers is if you do this work to understand what will be a great situation for you the multipurpose benefit of that research is you get that intel that you need to know throughout that process to make the rest work. You contact someone in the company that can help or hire you and sometimes you don’t even need to apply. We’ve had this happen for a number of our clients and students. Sometimes when you do that there is no reason to apply. Sometimes they will make the exception for you. For one role in particular I remember applying after I had accepted the job offer. On the first day they had me apply even though I’d already accepted it.

Lisa Lewis: It’s always funny when that happens. Sometimes organizations have online job applications but never look at those applicants. They are built exclusively on internal referrals. There are probably more than I’m aware of. If you don’t get someone to walk your resume in you are never going to get through their online application. They get a million different online applications because they are easy and fast and people do them quickly and sometimes thoughtlessly. And like you said earlier they fill up the hiring manager’s inbox with junk. Thinking about getting in touch before you apply can be the difference of being seen and looked at even if you are the perfect fit and you’ve carefully tailored your application.

Scott Barlow: The side benefit is you may determine it’s not a great fit and you save yourself all the frustrating time. Have you ever met anybody that loves filling out applications? Most high performers like doing the stuff that will have an impact and a lot look at the application process as not having an impact and it becomes useless work. I don’t think too many people love that. If you can save that time that is awesome.

Lisa Lewis: Love it. I think the last thing to talk about is making it easiest for the hiring manager to say yes to you as possible. I think the third thing is how do you make sure when finishing the application process, through emails back and forth with the hiring manager, or sending in an online application that your research comes through? Make it as relevant as possible. Show that you aren’t taking it casually and you aren’t just one of the hundred people that clicked the button on LinkedIn or Indeed. Make your effort, energy, and enthusiasm come through by being specific and clear on what you saw that made the organization compelling.

Scott Barlow: This is where if you haven’t done the upfront research you don’t have the ability to do this. It’s not possible or you are scrambling after the fact. When you are going through and doing this on the front side. Some of the things I’m looking for that make it easy to be relevant later are:

Who are the people involved in the process and what do I have in common with them? What do I know that is most important to them in that role or why it exists in the first place?

What do I know about the other people that are going to encounter my application through the process? This is making the assumption you’ve made the decision that it is right to apply.

How can I hit on all of those points that when they read the application they decide they should read the rest? They get excited because you have the set of experiences that line up with what they need. You have already done the research in advance and know it. They are excited because you have the value sets and you are made for the role.

That is the result you want when they view the applications so each portion is a yes and they want to look at the rest. Every single aspect is getting them to move along in the application and say it’s likely a fit so the next step is we need a meeting, the “interview”. That is a different way to think about the application process than what most people think. They are thinking how do I fill in what they ask. How do I put in my experience? Don’t put in your experience but put in what is relevant to the role, company, and people.

Lisa Lewis: We teach our students and coaching clients how to do this on a personalized level through some of the ways you can get involved with HTYC. One of the biggest things to think about is if everyone else is submitting their same standard version of their resume what are minor tweaks you can make on the relevance front to look like the dream candidate? It might be easier to send your resume as it is but top performers and stars are taking the extra time to tweak and focus on the resume because this single piece of paper has to encapsulate everything interesting and relevant to a hiring manager especially if you haven’t talked to them yet. How do you make that be as strategic of a marketing document as you possibly can based on what you have learned from your research and intentional focused outreach, insider intel that you have gained?

Scott Barlow: The reality is that it is nearly impossible to get that result where you are going through and having it happen in a tailored way. You can’t get that result unless you’ve done that upfront work and been able to chat with people in the organization on what really matters because there is often a disparity between what is online and what is there in reality. One doesn’t happen without the other and hopefully that gives you a great overview on how high performers are thinking on the process compared on how everyone else is thinking.

One way to break it down, to focus on results, that helps me, is I think of it in terms of what is the smallest amount of input that I can put into the process to get the outcomes I want? I don’t want just a job. I want a job offer that I’m excited about and is a great fit. A little distinguishing there. I want job offers that are a great fit, align with what I want, and my values. If you are doing that then even though you are spending more time on the front end we find people get a higher amount of job offers that align with them compared to the amount of hours they are putting into the process. A high performer is probably spending way less time on a per job offer basis compared to someone else who may have put in fifty applications. Maybe they still got one or two job offers but it’s not aligned with what they want. Does that make sense?

Lisa Lewis: I think that is a great way to phrase it. We are often focused on “I need get a job offer.” But if that is how you are measuring success you may find yourself in a situation where you drag discontent and baggage from one position to another because you are so focused on the outcome of just wanting a new job offer that has a higher pay, higher title, or at a prestigious place. If you aren’t focusing on the things that really contribute to your own sense of contentment, fulfillment, excitement, or success in a role then getting just a job offer probably won’t be good enough, especially for the people we tend to work with. They can go out and get job offers because they can do a lot of things because they are talented. You can do anything but how do we make sure your time, effort, and energy are focused on what is going to be fulfilling and satisfying to you? This process is a great way to make sure you are doing this upfront so you aren’t wasting precious time and energy on applications that aren’t going to fit.

Scott Barlow: Love it. Lisa thank you so much for making the time and taking the time to come on the show. We appreciate all your insight. This is awesome and why we keep having you back and want you on the team. If you want to catch more of Lisa’s story go back to episode 147. You can do that and find her all over our website. Her role has shifted a little over the last four months. She’s still doing coaching but you’ve taken on additional responsibilities and become our, well we don’t have a full title for you yet to be honest. I just realized that as I’m talking to HTYCers everywhere.

Lisa Lewis: This might be a good thing for another episode to talk about the process and about what we are going through right now that we will be excited to unveil. About how we are taking all of our material and work from great to world-class.

Scott Barlow: Exactly. We’ve learned so much over the last five years and we can now take it to world class. Next time we will dive into more of that. Thanks again.

Lisa Lewis: Thank you it’s such a pleasure. Bye guys.

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What It Means To Be Unhackable with Kary Oberbrunner

Have you ever been so excited about a new project or goal that you’ve set for yourself that you just can’t wait to start?

You sit and visualize yourself going through the motions of the process, checking off all the boxes on your to-do list, and finally you check off that last task, then you bask in the feeling of victory after you’ve achieved your accomplishment.

That entire process, the drive and determination, the movement forward, that feeling of accomplishment…that is what it means to be unhackable.

To be unhackable means to close the gap that exists between your ideas and the implementation of your ideas.

It means building yourself up to become an unstoppable force that reaches goals.

Take that philosophy and apply it to the process of your career transition and you become unhackable by eliminating all of the obstacles that stop you from reaching your dream career.

What drives many people to career change is the idea that there is a big potential for something more than what they’ve got going on in their career right now.

But sometimes even people with the strongest mindsets, get hacked.

There are a handful (maybe more than a handful) of things that stop people dead in their tracks as they begin their journey into a new career.

Some begin to feel like imposters as they begin to progress in their career change.

Some self-sabotage and start doubting their potential, then slowly they unintentionally begin to put the brakes on their path to a new career.

But just like computer systems have software that work to prevent getting hacked, there are ways for you to be proactive in becoming unhackable.

In order to get in front of the hacking, we need to identify what is leaving you vulnerable to getting hacked in the first place.

WHAT IS STOPPING YOU FROM BECOMING UNHACKABLE IN YOUR CAREER CHANGE?

The mind is everything. What you think you become.

Buddha

The most common obstacles that stop a lot of people during their career change are all about their mindset.

Here are the top three things stopping people from becoming unhackable (with some examples).

Problem: They lack the confidence in their knowledge & skills

They start thinking about themselves in a self-sabotaging ways.

  • They’ve been imagining that they’re experts in something.
  • That they really don’t have the transferable skills required to follow through on a new career.
  • That they’re really not good enough to make a career change.

Problem: They’re unsure of the direction or focus they want to pursue

  • They have a lot of interests, a lot of passions, but they’re not sure that their skills really apply to either.
  • They think that working in passions is a myth and that sticking to what they’ve always known and done is a safer bet, than taking a chance on something new.
  • Nothing has worked out for them to this point, that they’re stuck on what’s next.

Problem: They don’t know how to sell yourselves

  • They doubt the value their skills bring to the table.
  • They don’t know how to effectively market themselves.
  • They’re not “salespeople.” They don’t want to seem pushy.
  • They’re afraid of rejection.
SO, HOW DO YOU BECOME THAT UNSTOPPABLE, UNHACKABLE FORCE TO SUCCESSFULLY CHANGE CAREERS?

Whatever the mind can conceive and believe, it can achieve.

Napoleon Hill

Well, we change your mindset when it comes to your career change.

1. Get out of your own head and stop judging yourself.
2. Refocus your time and energy on your goal.

LACKING CONFIDENCE?

If you’re struggling with the confidence in your own knowledge and skills in a particular industry, you need to, first, acknowledge that there is a reason you started down the path of career change (and KUDOS to you on that note, because not a lot of people even make it as far as to acknowledge that a change needs to be made).

Remember that you started down this path because you knew that there was something bigger for you out there (and there is!).

So, if you need to, take a step back and take a breath and then come back into your process of career change refreshed and motivated to continue. As Kary Oberbrunner says, “Show up filled up.”

You are the expert and the guru. You have the skills to bring value to people.

Regain your perspective and come back full of what you already know you know and move forward.

CAN’T FIND A CAREER THAT FITS?

Who do you want to help? What do you want to contribute your talents to?

If you are having a little trouble answering those questions, ask yourself:

What have at least three people asked you for advice on?

Those people have come to you for help in something they trust you enough to help solve. That makes you credible. That proves that there is a need out there and that skill makes it something you can capitalize on.

From that little exercise, you can align your skills and strengths and begin to be more intentional in your career change.

WONDERING HOW TO MARKET YOURSELF?

Ever heard of a Values Proposition Statement (VPS)?

Anyone that is looking to change careers should have one.

Think of it like the menu at a drive-thru window. You know when you pull up to a drive-thru, you know exactly what they’re selling.

That is what your VPS should do.

It provides clarity of your intentions and lays out what you have to offer your next employer.

Here’s a formula to give you a little framework to build on:

“I AM A ____________, WHO HELPS ___________ DO OR UNDERSTAND _________ SO THAT ______________”

Once you have your VPS lined up and ready to roll, you’re ¾ of the way there.

The last quarter of the marketing equation requires you to change your mindset from “selling yourself” to a mindset that selling is serving, and marketing your knowledge and skills is storytelling.

Once you can frame your pitch in that way, you’re golden.

People don’t want to be sold, they want to be helped.

NEXT STEPS

Becoming unhackable is a mindset change.

Building your confidence, finding your footing in the direction you want to take your career, and learning how to take all of that and put it into action by effectively marketing your skills and knowledge as assets will make you unhackable to continue to successfully transition your career.

Your journey into a new career isn’t easy.

And because the process is a journey, we know it’s easy to let yourself to get hacked.

If you’re finding a little bit of difficulty building your confidence or finding your footing on what career path is right for you, we have world-class career coaches that can help you get where you envision your next career.

Visit us at https://www.happentoyourcareer.com/coaching and let us know where you find yourself getting hacked and one of our coaches will be glad to help you!

EPISODE LINKS AND RESOURCES

Guest: KARY OBERBRUNNER

Relevant Links
KaryOberbrunner.com

Elixir Project

Social Media
Facebook: @karyoberbrunnerauthor
Twitter: @karyoberbrunner
Kary on Linkedin

Scott Barlow: Welcome back to Happen to Your Career. I’m very excited to bring on today’s guest. I have with me someone who has defined a way to make your dreams unhackable. We are going to dig into that and have a conversation. We had a brief conversation before we pushed record that I was excited to talk about. All that and plenty more. Welcome to the podcast and Happen to Your Career Kary. How are you?

Kary Oberbrunner: Hey Scott. It is great to be here. Super excited to talk with your wonderful people and I’m ready to be here.

Scott Barlow: Very cool. Before we jump into all of it I’m really curious how do you describe and tell people what you do these days?

Kary Oberbrunner: One word “igniter” I’m an igniter and I ignite souls. I’m an author coach and speaker. I’ve been a lot of things in my past. We’ll probably get into that. My most recent career move was twelve years as a leader in a nonprofit and I felt claustrophobic and that I had done as much as I could to create change and excitement and vision. I felt capped. After much thought and prayer I went pro with my passion back in 2012 and it has been a fun and wild ride.

Scott Barlow: The last five years of a fun wild ride. I really want to talk about that, and we will, but I’d like to go even further back for a short bit and give people a glimpse into your story. You’ve had a great one and that’s part of the reason we wanted to bring you on for this conversation. Where does all this start? Now you are an igniter and you’ve had the crazy wild ride but where does it start before that? How far back do we need to go?

Kary Oberbrunner: We can go back pretty far and I’ll give you the exciting stuff. I grew up, not with tons of income or intellect. I grew up in a blue collar home. Most of my generations of family members didn’t go to college or anything like that. As a young kid I was a big feeler and thinker. I had a stuttering problem. I started off school and very early on kids are kids. Acceptance was very important to me. Just being friends with people. They would pick on you and you’d get made fun of. From a young age I didn’t like speaking. They sent me to a speech therapist in the last 70s early 80s. They said you have a learning disability and it’ll probably get worse, and basically good luck. They didn’t have programs and knowledge like they do today. They labeled you and that was it. I went to speech therapy and found some help but words were never my friend. Words never made me strong, but weak.

Like any kid in life we experience pain. I experienced pain; Grandparents dying and that sort. Rather than sharing and talking I got into an addictive, negative habit called self-injury. It started as biting but in my teen years, which was before the internet, I became a cutter. I didn’t want anyone to know. As a young male that’s not super common. I was still an achiever and on the wrestling team but I did get addicted to self-injury and hid the secret for years through college and my first year of graduate school. Everything came to the surface my first year of graduate school where I confided in a professor because I wanted to get healthy and it backfired. This professor was not a good person and kicked me out of the program or threatened to. Thankfully the vice president stuck up for me. He got me help. In my early twenties, I was about to be married, and I had an early midlife crisis at that young age. I needed to come clean because I was an imposter.

Scott Barlow: Let me ask about that. I feel like I am woefully ignorant about self-injury addiction. For my benefit and others what is something I don’t know or would be surprised about that?

Kary Oberbrunner: So basically, fifteen percent of young female’s self-injury. They basically create pain through a number of things: burning, biting, and cutting. What they are doing is re-creating a painful situation that they can control. A lot of times you see self-injury when people feel out of control. It physiologically releases endorphins. Sometimes you hear people say they just want to feel something because they just feel dead and numb and want to feel alive. They want to see themselves bleed because no one sees their pain on the outside. We live in a superficial world where we just say how are you doing? Oh fine. You can begin to feel like everything in your life is fake. You aren’t okay and self-injury can be a form of you trying to be authentic with the fact that you don’t feel well. It’s not a sign of death and destruction and suicide usually. It’s a coping mechanism that helps you make it.

Scott Barlow: That’s really interesting because we spend a lot of time on this show talking about how to be more authentic. Again, completely naive I didn’t realize that those two were related in that way. That is really interesting to me. How on earth did the rest of this happen in terms of you going from asking for help, getting denied help, someone else stepping in, and you have this very early midlife crisis? Take me through that.

Kary Oberbrunner: I did go to counseling. I tell people you probably haven’t self-injured but we all actually do. We don’t all believe our potential. We self-sabotage. Ask any entrepreneur and anyone will admit to self-sabotage. I got through it by focusing on how God wants perfection. I gravitated toward that. You either gravitate toward religion or rebellion.

Scott Barlow: What do you mean?

Kary Oberbrunner: Most humans, in my opinion, and I’m going to go a little faith on you, will not be a soul on fire unless you have a connection with your creator core and your community, otherwise we feel disconnected. To feel connected to our creator, some people are going to say “by golly I’ll just work my way, I’ll just try my hardest and be good, and be my best.” They work their way, it’s called religion. Other people say “heck with it, there is no way I could be good enough. I won’t work my way to be connected with God. I might as well live it up because I don’t have a chance,” so they go toward rebellion. If you’ve heard the story of the prodigal son, those were messed up kids. The one who ate it up, drank it up, lived it up, and spent all the money we always think is the bad guy, but so is the older brother who was a complete jerk. It was revealed the only reason he was nice to his dad was he wanted his inheritance too. My point is, my crisis of faith and way of healing was to realize that I can go to God completely pissed off, completely angry, and completely upset, because that is what actually starts the healing. I stopped pretending with people and God. Trust me, prior to this, you looked at my life on the outside and thought this guy has perfect grades, titles, and etcetera but on the inside I was completely a mess.

I found incredible healing and freedom from being real with how I felt to God. I found healing in that situation. I did a lot of journaling. Words became my friend. And I think those were the beginning stages of becoming a writer.

Scott Barlow: I was going to ask that. How did some of the stuff relate together so that you transitioned from words are paining me to words are enabling me?

Kary Oberbrunner: Well, this bleeds into business and if you are an imposter. Eighty percent admit to feeling like an imposter at some point in their life. I’ve done master research in the imposter syndrome. What is the imposter syndrome? I shouldn’t belong here, don’t belong here, shouldn’t be here, I’m not qualified enough, if people only new my story or what I did this morning they would think I’m a loser. That’s the imposter syndrome. It’s funny because we think it will disqualify us in the business world but in reality it’s what qualifies you. What is hilarious is that I have a doctorate and master’s degree in seminary - meaning bible stories. I have zero formal education in business and yet I’m often asked to consult with large businesses for business and marketing. I’m very clear that I don’t have the credentials and I think the fact that I admit it makes me different and they realize I’m not pretending. The previous people focused on their degrees but I come in and be real and they can relate. You become a magnet for the people that matter but you repel the other fake people because they realize if they get close they may have to admit their stuff. I think that is why our brand has blown up. People are attracted to authenticity.

Scott Barlow: Do you think that there will become a time where authenticy will become more normal. Right now I think part of the attraction that I find, and see a lot of the same benefits, in our business is because it’s so different right now. I’m curious what your thoughts are because you’ve spent a lot of time thinking about this? Do you think it’s realistic for it to become more normal?

Kary Oberbrunner: I think people are too authentic in the worst way. Let me explain: Social media. They say I’m a business owner, an entrepreneur, I’m doing a side hustle, I like clients, but then they go through the line at McDonalds or somewhere and don’t get their food right and they quickly pull up Facebook and say that McDonald’s sucks and so on. They have victim talk. Victims lay in bed with blame, excuses, and denial. Victors take ownership, put their oar in the water and move forward. Ownership, accountability, and responsibility - OAR. I can tell the losers and winners on social media in about two seconds. The winners are the people who are adding value to others and exhibiting ownership, accountability, and responsibility. You may say how is that possible because I don’ know anyone like that on Facebook. I’m not the end all but go check out my page. I get tons of responses and reactions from creating value for people. I’m not authentic on social media when I say, my wife and I just had a fight and she’s...... When you are a business leader or entrepreneur with a social media account you are telling the world to follow because you know where you are going, you are getting results, and you know how to help. When you air your dirty laundry in the name of authenticity it’s not helping anyone. I know it sounds like a paradox but I’m talking about selective sharing when the context is right. You are not a differentiator when you are authentic online with your rage, anger, disappointment and frustration. That’s not a differentiation, that’s what everyone is doing. I’m talking about authenticity that is thoughtful, redemptive and proves a path and way forward. There are three tones for any business, book, and leader.

Scott Barlow: I’d say one hundred percent of this applies to any job seeker, career change, or any situation where you are formally or informally a leader or somebody that is looked to for one reason or another. Yes please share.

Kary Oberbrunner: Again, that victim and victor was not my own. Some things that are my own I’ll claim, otherwise I’ll tell you who said it. No one knows who came up with that. The next one is not my own either. There are three tones for any book or social media. Your social media has a tone. Just like a radio station has a genre so does your social media. If a radio station plays pop, opera, and rap in one day they will lose their listeners because confusion repels but clarity attracts. If you go to my social media it is on par and brand with igniting souls. That is the radio station I play. If my account ever got hacked people would know within three seconds that it wasn’t me.

The three voices you can have in any business or book are Sage, Sherpa, or Struggler. Sage is the style that says I’ve arrived, I know the secrets, I’ve found the path, the Holy Grail or elixir. Come sit at my feet and I’ll share my knowledge. That is an Oprah, Tony Robbins, a Jack Welch. They present themselves as Sages.

Other people present as Sherpas. They say I was stuck, I did have problems and didn’t know where I was going but I found a way and got up the mountain. Here’s the shortcut to get there faster. That is the style of business and books I write.

The third is Struggler. The Struggler says I see a problem. I don’t know how to fix it. If you see it too and want to learn together let’s figure it out. That is books like Blue Like Jazz by Donald Miller. He said there is a problem with religion that I’m willing to call out. I don’t have a solution but let’s find it together. Those books work as well. You can have any approach but you get slammed if you pretend you are a Sage but you are really a Struggler. You will get lit up.

Scott Barlow: Tell me why.

Kary Oberbrunner: People don’t want imposters. If you say I’ve been there, I’ve done it, I’ve figured it out come sit at my feet. People will do a little digging on social media. I saw something on my newsfeed the other day “High School Girls Discover with Detective Work Principals Credentials are Fraud” something like that. Guess what? She got fired and she presented herself as I’ve been there and done it and she got called out. She is done. That is the place you get nailed. People can accept struggler if that is how you come off. I think if you are a sage and you come off as a struggler people will call that out because they realize you can’t relate to their pain and are being fake or placating them.

Scott Barlow: If people are thinking about their social media and how their accounts project themselves or create perceptions and they are really just getting started, and  thinking about projecting an intentional perception versus accidental or a word in between, something other, how would you advise them to get started? What are a couple ways to think differently in-between going directly to Sage, Sherpa, or Struggler. How can they immediately make a major difference?

Kary Oberbrunner: Number one alignment. You’ve got to get the radio station genre right. Most people’s social media, I’m being silly, but it goes “my dogs are so cute,” then “I hate what’s going on right now with politics” then “love this video about cats” then “Going to the monster truck show tonight” and “Hey I’ve got a business. If you’re interested in coaching private message me” then “I’m just so sick of Starbucks not serving hot coffee.” That’s peoples normal social media and what I’m saying is social media today is your personal television station called Facebook Live or YouTube. It’s your own PR firm called Twitter. It’s your own publishing company called WordPress. You have everything today that people thirty years ago would die for. They would have needed to be big business to have it. The fact that you have the tools and you aren’t clear is a dangerous game. Stop, take a hiatus from social media, rebrand yourself, and understand your brand. We do it with dream job boot camp and many of our programs. Clarity attracts, confusion repels. You will keep repelling people inadvertently or intentionally the more you attach your social media to your brain without doing the important task of thinking.

Scott Barlow: This is really interesting to me. I’m thinking about it for lots of different uses. Right now we are hiring for two new team members and we are going through looking at their social media accounts and learning the stream of consciousness flow about them as people. We are getting a level of authenticity but possibly not the level they intended to share with us. In another example this is something we use all the time, reaching out to other companies we want to partner with. We sent a gift to someone the other day based on what she had on her social media because she took the time to interact with us and we learned a bunch, maybe some stuff she didn’t want us to, from her social media. It seems to me that from a small amount of intention in really trying to determine what type of channel it is, at minimum do you want to project jazz versus R&B and at least making that decision. That will cause a major difference in every aspect because people have access to it. It’s powerful and a detractor as well. We just got forty job applications for one position and a whole bunch of those people won’t progress in the process because of some of that.

Kary Oberbrunner: You go to my website and immediately you have my VPS my Value Proposition Statement. I tell people that your VPS is essentially you seeing yourself as a drive-thru restaurant. When they go to your website they are going through your drive-thru shouting, “I heard you could maybe help me but what do you serve here?” In other words, I hear you serve food here, what do you have? If the person taking your order turns around and you hear him ask his co-worker “hey this guy wants to know what we serve, I don’t know, what do I tell him?” What are you going to do at that window? You are going to drive away. What the heck, they don’t know what they serve, what is going on here? Unfortunately if I told most people, and honestly even most of your show listeners - because they are amazing - but if they are like the majority of the population, most people don’t know what they serve.

If I had a thousand dollars and said Scott told me I need to hire you, Scott said you can help me. What can you help me do? I have a thousand dollars. Most people do not know what they would say. They don’t have clarity. When you don’t have clarity about what you can do for a particular client they aren’t going to hire you.

On my website it says I am an author, coach and speaker. I’ll tell you the VPS formula - I am a ____ who helps ____ do or understand ____ so that _____. That’s it. That is your VPS. That is why you make income because you are creating value for someone in those areas.

Mine is: I am an author, coach, and speaker who helps individuals and organizations clarify (I sell clarity) who they are, why they are here, and where they are going so they can become a soul on fire, experience unhackability, and share their message with the world. The secret sauce is that I literally have a product or service for each word in that sentence. When I say I’m an author you can see it on Amazon. When it say I’m a coach I have programs. I’m a speaker you can hire me. Who you are - identity. Why you are here - purpose. Where you are going - direction. Every one of my VPS statements has a product or service tied to hit. That is where you can build a very cool life and business.

Scott Barlow: Let’s talk about that for a little. This might be a good time to shift gears. Speaking of building a great life, business, or cool anything one of the things you mentioned earlier was the concept of the biggest thing that stops us is ourselves. I really wanted to ask you about that idea of first, what is stopping us and what does it actually look like and second the idea of unhackability. I want to dig into that.

Kary Oberbrunner: Most people are getting stopped because they are thinking about themselves. I know that sounds weird. It sounds like what do you mean? I don’t think I’m good enough. Who are you focusing on? Yourself. I’ve picked up clients at coffee shops and at parks pushing my daughter on the swing. I have a term that is “show up, filled up.” Everywhere you go you are full. Meaning you do not go into any relationship or exchange empty. People feel that.

I’ve picked up $5,000 clients on an airplane sitting by a complete stranger because I’ve showed up, filled up.

Me: How you doing?
Her: Great.
Me: Where you going?
Her: Ohio. I was just at a conference.
Me: Oh really tell me about it.
Her: I was at a conference and I want to someday return as a speaker.
Me: What’s holding you back?
Her: A book.
Me: Really? I’m an author coach.
Her: Really? I’ve been working on a book, I keep getting stuck.
Me: Really? How about we in the remaining flight come up with your title, subtitle, and table of contents.
Her: You could seriously do that?

I had to shut off my phone and computer, sit there and give value to this woman for two hours. Guess what? I showed up, filled up, and she purchased and bought.

That is how you do sales. Sales is not, Oh crap! If I give my best statement they will know I have nothing else to give. If I give my best away for free no one will buy from me. That is scarcity thinking. I want people to show up filled up. Focus on the person in front of you. They have a name, fear, and desires. You have massive skills. Every one of your listeners is a guru or expert at something. The problem is they are too familiar with it. They think it’s too easy. What do you mean people don’t know how to do interior decorating, everyone knows how to do that. I want your listeners to think about what at least three people have asked their advice on. That is probably a business. It illustrates there is a need. People assume that you are credible, that is why they are asking for advice. All you need to do is find a way to monetize it. Most of us are scared to ask for money and talk to strangers. We were told that as kids don’t talk to strangers and don’t ask people for money but then we go out in the business world. We have this psychological repellent from what we think is that guy or that girl who appears salesy. Here is what I tell people: Selling is serving. Marketing is storytelling. Can you tell stories and serve people? If they say yes I say you would be awesome in sales and marketing.

Scott Barlow: I think that is true for nearly everything that requires any kind of sales, which most things do.

Kary Oberbrunner: Yes, everyone is in the sales business. Even parents trying to get their kids to eat green beans.

Scott Barlow: Oh yeah, bring on something else when that airplane isn’t working. Why are all of us so resistant to those pieces or why are more of us not relating those two together?

Kary Oberbrunner: Why are we resistant to those?

Scott Barlow: Yes particularly the selling. We just mentioned that from early on we are taught not to talk to strangers. By the way I’m mentally celebrating that I just had a conversation with my daughter the other day on how you actually talk to strangers.

Kary Oberbrunner: That is cool. I think we do not really believe that we have value and that is what it comes down to. If you honestly had a cure for cancer would you say “well you know, I know Billy has cancer and is dying, but gee, he might not like what I tell him, he might be offended or reject me?” Maybe I should just keep that secret about cancer to myself and let him go through chemotherapy again. You would be like no, especially if you had a love one die of cancer. You would say I don’t want anyone to go through that. You would be focused on them and not you. Too many of us don’t think there is a cancer, we don’t think we have a cure, and we are focused on ourselves and our own inability and that is why we get hacked. How do you get over that?

Scott Barlow: How do you? What can you do?

Kary Oberbrunner: I’ll tell you how I got over it. I said I’m going to stop judging myself. When I’m talking with someone, and this was early in my five years of going pro, and the stakes were high. My wife wasn’t the type to say hey Kary you can do anything and I’ll support you quitting your job. She was like you better bring in the money because we have three kids and we are turning down health insurance and a mortgage. I married a truth teller and I needed that. I was nervous and the stakes were high. I did a side hustle. I teach that in my book “Day Job to Dream Job.” I don’ think, if you can, that you should do just the romantic thing that never works saying I’ll quit my job and figure it out. That isn’t smart because you haven’t developed the character of a side hustle. Change of location doesn’t mean change of person. You need to become the person worthy of your dream job while you are in your day job.

Anyway, long story short I stopped judging myself when I was sitting with a potential client wondering how I was coming off and sounding stupid, and wondering what does this person need? My mind started going blank I was getting nervous. I was getting to the money part and thinking he’d probably say no. I felt awkward. All I said was isn’t that interesting. Isn’t it interesting, just when I’m about to help this guy and lead him in a deeper relationship through a coaching program that I start to get nervous. Isn’t that interesting? All I did was acknowledge the fear. I didn’t judge it or push it down because that makes you focus on it. I encourage people it’s as simple as saying “isn’t that interesting.” Use that phrase next time you feel yourself getting hacked and getting nervous.

People don’t want to be sold they want to be helped. Raise the objections before they can. I have an author program. It’s a legit, solid program that costs money because we help them build a business around their book. I know people will be uncomfortable with the price so I handle it before it comes. I say, “Scott if all you want to see is your book in print please don’t go with me. Go down to Kinkos photocopier and hand them your flash drive and they will print you a book.” If that is your goal go for it. They kind of chuckle and say that’s not what I want so you say what do you want? You stop talking and pitching and you listen. You help. When you do that and you aren’t tied to the outcome people feel it. I always put a guarantee on our products that creates more sales. If people can write down these six words which we call the Deeper Path Pay-off from one of my books The Deeper Path, it says income is never the problem. Everyone says income is the problem. It’s never the problem it all starts with clarity.

I’m going to say six words that flow from the other. Clarity produces competence. Once you are clear you know what you are good at which produces confidence. Clarity, competence, confidence. Once you have those three people listen. They pay attention. Notice currency today is not money but attention. Now you are influencing them which allows you to impact them which allows you to gain impact. Six words from deeper path pay-off are: Clarity, competence, confidence, influence, impact, and income. That is how every sale works. When people focus on the money they are focusing on the transaction rather than the transformation.

Scott Barlow: Let me pull you back for just a second because I’m curious and I don’t want to lose this. We have a couple open loops. What happens after you stop judging yourself and you are using the phrase “isn’t this interesting” to create this unhackability?

Kary Oberbrunner: Crazy story, it’s a movie analogy, which is the best. In the movie “Inception” Leonardo DiCaprio plays a guy that goes inside of dreams to steal dreams. Once he was in the dream everything was cool. He was operating inside the dream and no one knew he was trying to steal it. When he started to think about it everything got weird and everyone in the dream turned on him to tear him apart. Acknowledging “isn’t that interesting” allows you to refocus on the client in front of you. That is what I’m talking about. When you say, “oh crap, I’m starting to think about my voice and if I sound confident,” you have immediately left the scene. The client feels that. The client says whoa where did my potential coach go? You can’t be in two places at once. You are in your head right now judging yourself about your effectiveness. You’ve lost the client. Imagine a brain surgeon doing that, playing Xbox while doing surgery. No one would do that; horrible doctor. But we do that. We play around with our self-limiting beliefs and think the client won’t realize it. No, you don’t judge, but show up filled up. Refocus on the client in front of you. Play a trick, say I’m going to count how many times they say “the”. It forces you to focus. People can tell. That creates confidence. I once was around a guy who was in the room with Paula Abdul and she wanted to hire someone and every guy walked in trying to sell her. “You should hire me because I did this project, etc.” The guy, my friend, walked up to her, knelt down eye level, looked her in the eye and said Paula what do you need? That is the one she hired. People don’t want all the credentials. They want to know that you care, are listening, and will help them.

Scott Barlow: I love that. For a variety of reasons. Shifting the focus, I know there is term for it but it escapes me. Inserting that trigger point where you have made the decision in advance to observe instead of judge and then giving yourself freedom to practice that by inserting the question of “isn’t that interesting” and acknowledging when it happens is the first step to change any unconscious behavior or emotion. I absolutely love that. Then shifting that focus to other people and focusing on how you can help.

Kary Oberbrunner: Selling is serving.

Scott Barlow: Awesome. Hey I really appreciate that, and you taking the time today and being able to take us through your story and share a few anecdotes. I love this stuff. I’m curious for other folks interested in getting more Kary where can they find more about what you do and the things we’ve mentioned today?

Kary Oberbrunner: Karyoberbrunner.com is where you can find out a lot of things. That is where everything is. If people say they want to learn more about books its karyoberbrunner.com/book. I’m excited about what you’re doing Scott. I’m very passionate about helping people close the gap between their ideas, implementing, and that is our unhackability. We have a free assessment people can take at elixirprojectbook.com. That is my fiction book that was super fun to write. It’s a metaphor for how many of us get hacked by our own self-limiting beliefs and how to close that gap.

Scott Barlow: Very cool. We will have all of those in the show notes. Go to happentoyourcareer.com/177 and check out all of that and quite a bit more. Thank you Kary. I appreciate you taking the time and making the time. This has been awesome.

Kary Oberbrunner: Thanks for having me and keep doing your amazing work Scott. I appreciate you.

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Multipotentialite: How to Be Everything with Emilie Wapnick

“IT’S COMPLETELY POSSIBLE TO HAVE A LIFE WITH PLENTY OF VARIETY THAT ALSO PROVIDES STABILITY.” – EMILIE WAPNICK

Multipotentialite.
Multi-passionate.
Scanner.
Renaissance Person.
Generalist.
Multipod.

Whichever term you favor, the meaning behind it is what’s important.

WHAT IS A MULTIPOTENTIALITE?

According to our guest (and coiner of the term), Emilie Wapnick, a multipotentialite is a person that doesn’t have “one true calling the way that specialists do.”

Emilie describes multipods as people with many paths that pursue all of them, either sequentially or simultaneously (or both).

A person with Multipotentiality “thrives on learning, exploring, and mastering new skills.” As innovators and problem solvers, the multi-passionate have the need to discover anything and everything to satisfy their curiosity.

While having the drive to learn new things and master new skills is a fantastic quality and strength to have while job searching, a lot of multi-passionate people struggle with finding a career that “fits” them because they have such a wide range of interests. This makes it hard to narrow down a specific career, since there are so many choices out there that they can thrive in and leaves them often asking “what do I want to be when I grow up.”

Is the struggle starting to make sense?

DO YOU FIND THAT YOU IDENTIFY AS A MULTIPOTENTIALITE NOW?

The secret in thriving as a multi-passionate, career-minded person, as we will outline below, is finding that sweet spot in the amount of variety a multipod needs in their career. As a Jack/Jill-of-All-Trades, you’ll have to pinpoint the intersection between your interests that will not only make you happy, but earn you money.

Emilie, a multipod herself, has studied and surveyed individuals that identify themselves as multi-passionate people and has outlined strategies that allow you to succeed in creating a career and a life that encompasses your many passions as a multipotentialite. If you want to hear more of Emilie’s story check out episode 103.

Let’s take a closer look at how a mulipotentialite can structure their work and position themselves to build a career by combining their interests.

WORK MODELS & STRATEGIES FOR THE MULTIPOTENTIALITE:

STRATEGY 1: GROUP HUG

The Group Hug approach to your career is defined by having a multifaceted job or business that allows you to wear many hats and shift between several domains.

This approach allows you to take your passions and do some research to find jobs that encompass your most-valued interests. You’ll want to look at starting a career in interdisciplinary fields like teaching, urban planning, or architecture.

If you’re struggling to find an interdisciplinary field that you’d enjoy on your own, another way to go about finding an industry you could succeed in is by doing a different kind of research, and finding where the multipods hang out and ask for their career advice.

Another great way to Group Hug your interests into one full-time career is to look for work at an open-minded organization, small businesses are usually a great place to start. If you get the chance to pitch a new job task outside your job description make sure to frame it in a way that the organization can see how it will benefit.

And if you aren’t able to combine your interests in your day job, you could always start a side hustle to work on your other passion projects!

STRATEGY 2: SLASH APPROACH

Thisapproach is a great work model for those multipotentiality if you have a lot of niche interests that don’t directly compliment one another.

To these folks with interests that distinctly differ, “part-time” jobs are the dream. That is, jobs that are intentionally part-time so it allows you to work in completely separate passions, as opposed to a handful of part-time jobs that you have just to pay the bills.

The Slash work model is a favorite among people that highly value freedom and flexibility in their career, consequently, the Slash approach does require a fair amount of self-direction, independence, and organizational skills.

Side-hustlers also fall in as the Slash careerist.

STRATEGY 3: EINSTEIN APPROACH

The Einstein approach is defined as having a full-time job or business that fully supports you financially, is mentally-simulating rather than mentally-exhausting, one that you thoroughly enjoy, and still leaves you with the time and energy to pursue your other passions on the side.

This is also referred to as having a “good enough job.” Your current job is good enough to pay your bills, while allowing you to explore other work on the side.

The Einstein model is enjoyable, fun, yet provides you with a challenge outside of your day job.

Side note:  Are you wondering how people that use the Einstein approach find the extra time and energy to work on passion projects after working a full-day job?

As multipotentialites have such a variety of interests, many of them that effectively use the Einstein approach to fulfill their needs to work in their passions often times work on completely separate, yet enjoyable interests that utilize different parts of their brain, because it allows them to have the energy to work outside of their day jobs.

STRATEGY 4: PHOENIX APPROACH

Working in a single industry for several months or years, then shifting gears to start a new career in a new field is what the Phoenix approach to careers is all about.

If you’re angling towards the Phoenix approach and you’re ready to make your switch, an easy way to transition to another full-fledged career is to start to build something on the side because it will allow you to continue to grow it so you will a smooth transition when you’re ready to move onto the next career.

Speaking of transitioning careers, below are a few suggestions to make that move as easy as possible.

Don’t buy into the idea that

[multipotentialites] are the ‘Jack-

Of-All-Trades, Master-of-None.’ It’s

totally possible to nail this stuff and

thrive as a multipod.

-Emilie Wapnick
HOW TO CREATE A SMOOTH TRANSITION AS A MULTIPOTENTIALITE
  1.  Reach out to your network connections and find people in the field you’re trying to get into
  2.  Expand your network and go to more events
  3.  Volunteer in a job or industry you’re interested in to gain experience
  4.  “Free work” – Reach out to an organization, pitch the work you think needs to be done and outline how you        would like to do that for free, as you continue to excell in the work you’re doing, pitch the idea of getting          paid for the job
  5.  Job shadow
  6.  Get training

On top of that, remember to take note and emphasize your transferable skills in every job you pursue. Your career experience, no matter the industry, is valuable. The important part is being able to frame those transferable skills and strengths to benefit any organization that you plan on contacting.

I WANT MORE INFORMATION!

If you’re still running into roadblocks after following Emilie’s work approaches for multipotentialites or feel like you’re still missing a piece of your career puzzle, get in touch with our world-class career coaches and they will help guide you through your obstacles and provide you with the support you need to combine your passions into a career work plan!

Head on over to https://www.happentoyourcareer.com/coaching to find the career help you need.

Catch Emilie’s live presentation from this podcast below!

Remember, now that you’ve decided to do something about your current situation, you’ve already made progress. And, just because you’ve made a decision to move forward with one thing, doesn’t mean that you’re committed to it forever.

There is always a way to pivot.

Once you take action and do something different from what you’ve been doing, you’re already moving in the right direction.

Don’t rush your career change process. By doing that, you defeat the purpose of the time you’ve put into doing all of the soul-searching and goal-setting to find your next career move.

If you hit a road block and don’t know what to do next, don’t be too hard on yourself.

Big life change isn’t always a leisurely stroll in the park.

If you find that you need an extra push of support, we’ve got the resources for you. Check out the Career Change Bootcamp program as it was created to guide you to build a strong foundation in finding the right path to your next career.

Read more about it here or visit our Career Coaching resource for a more personalized one-on-one career adviser.

BUY EMILIE’S BOOK AND GET A BONUS!
JUST UPLOAD YOUR RECEIPT!

Emilie Wapnick 00:03
It wasn't until my mid 20s, when I sort of made the conscious decision to just flip it and make it a good thing and be like, "This is how I am, I'm going to find a way to make it work. I'm going to see if there are other people out there like this who are making a living, who are successful."

Introduction 00:23
This is the Happen To Your Career podcast, with Scott Anthony Barlow. We help you stop doing work that doesn't fit you, figure out what does and make it happen. We help you define the work that's unapologetically you, and then go get it. If you're ready to make a change, keep listening. Here's Scott. Here's Scott. Here's Scott.

Scott Anthony Barlow 00:46
This is Scott Anthony Barlow, and you are listening to Happen To Your Career, the show that helps you figure out what work fits you by exploring other stories, we get to bring on experts like Emilie Wapnick, which who we have on today, who help people that don't just have one true calling, or people that have really amazing stories, like, Kirby Verceles, who found her ideal job by learning her strengths. These are people that are just like you, except for they've gone from where they are to what they really want to be doing.

Emilie Wapnick 01:16
I'm a multipotentialite who has this one thing, but I'm like an expert at not being an expert at this point.

Scott Anthony Barlow 01:24
My conversation with Emilie today, we get to talk about what happens when you have lots of different interests, when you're passionate about a number of different things. Or maybe you have a lot of hobbies, and you're trying to figure out how to put them all together, either with your career, or should they be your career, or something completely different that you haven't thought of. Those are the questions that we answer today. And in fact, when people who are good at a number of different things, and they have lots of talents, when they're trying to pick their career, if you will, then they bump up against the question of, hey, how do I earn income for a lot of these different things, too? And that's exactly the question we're looking to answer today. Emilie and I go deep into, how can that look? In fact, what are some different models and examples of ways that that can happen in your life. So I think that you're going to enjoy this. Emily has been on the show before, she's a fantastic guest. And she has a high degree of expertise in what you might call multipotentialite or multi potential reality. There's a number of other names for it, too. But we'll get into all that and a lot more.

Jerrad Shivers 02:42
Decided that maybe, you know, 80, 90 hour weeks and a young family doesn't necessarily go together.

Scott Anthony Barlow 02:49
Jerrad was burned out with long hours and high stress.

Jerrad Shivers 02:53
When we started to do the questionnaire and write everything down, we started our pros and cons with where we wanted to live and who wanted to be around and all that stuff.

Scott Anthony Barlow 03:01
Listen to Jerrad's story later on in the episode to learn how he used coaching to help him figure out what fits him and actually make the change to work he loves.

Jerrad Shivers 03:10
I ended up with my dream job.

Scott Anthony Barlow 03:14
It might help to throw out some context for how we got to hear, I guess, which as I told you, I don't know five minutes ago, I got sent your TEDx sock no less than 10 times from my customers, from people that follow our blog and our business. And it was coming at me left and right over about a period of three weeks or so. So congratulations.

Emilie Wapnick 03:43
Thank you. And I apologize before this call, but I'll apologize again. Sorry for spamming you.

Scott Anthony Barlow 03:50
The public apology.

Emilie Wapnick 03:53
But that's pretty cool.

Scott Anthony Barlow 03:54
That really is pretty cool. So I went back, and this was really interesting for me, because I really love people's stories. That's something that I'm fascinated by. And I love people's careers, not just the career like, I don't know, job occupation or title, which clearly we're not going to spend a lot of time talking about, like, specializing or anything along those lines here, except to the extent to define, but I'm fascinated by a career in the aspect of it, its people's journeys. And you've had a pretty interesting one. So I'm curious though, what your reaction is to this, I want to play you something before we get going because, and we'll see if you remember this. This is from an interview a while ago, before you really even started doing any speaking long before the TED talk...

Emilie Wapnick 04:44
Oh, no.

Scott Anthony Barlow 04:45
I know, huh? Take a listen.

Natalie Sisson 04:49
Lots of different product launches, or are you really wanting to focus on more recurring revenue types of products and services?

Emilie Wapnick 04:56
Well, I love the recurring revenue model that I'm definitely a big fan of that. But I think for now, we're gonna look at how you tried in, and maybe it brings more people in a couple months, I actually have a speaking role that I want to use.

Natalie Sisson 05:11
So I want to hear it. If you want share it.

Emilie Wapnick 05:13
Get into public speaking, maybe talk to, at some schools and some organizations, it's just something that's been on my backburner list for a while, I've got quite a bit of a fear of public speaking, like most people, and I'd like to just get over that. So the second half of 2012 is going to be devoted to this public speaking goal. And I also want to write a new Manifesto, because my ideas have evolved quite a bit since the first one. And I think that that would go nicely with the speaking because they're both kind of on the same topic, which is the multipotentialite making it work.

Natalie Sisson 05:45
I agree. And just touching on that, actually, I mean, one, I look forward to seeing your speaking progress, and I'm sure you'll probably start out kind of small, and before you know it, you'll explode onto the scene.

Scott Anthony Barlow 05:54
Okay, and I think that we've reached critical mess. Just recently...

Emilie Wapnick 06:00
Got your craft, you know, it was so awesome.

Scott Anthony Barlow 06:03
Well, so that was a little bit of context here. So that was Natalie Sisson, and the audio quality wasn't the greatest. So I apologize for that. But I really wanted to play it anyways, just to give people before and after, since that's what we do on this show, really dig into people's journeys and stories and everything like that. So I'm curious, just what are your thoughts listening to that, like blast from the past? Before we get into any of my curiosities beyond that.

Emilie Wapnick 06:28
That was super cool. I was afraid you were gonna play something stupid that I'd said, like four years ago. But, no, it's true. I hated public speaking, I hated speaking in class. And, you know, anytime I had to give a presentation, it was like, my life ended. But I just hit this point where I felt like I had a message to share, and also how I wanted to get over this fear. And, yeah, and then I started doing it and eventually got to the TEDx stage. And yeah.

Scott Anthony Barlow 07:04
So, first of all, you've got one particular topic that your TEDx talk is on. And again, I really want to dig into that. But I'm curious, you're obviously somebody who's got lots of different interest, right. And that's what the TEDx talk is on, and even the name that you've come up with, and you've come up with this name years ago, at this point, right? I'm gonna tell people a little bit about that. And then I've loved to go backwards and find out a little bit more about how this all came to be.

Emilie Wapnick 07:38
Yeah, so the word that you're referring to is multipotentialite. And multipotentialite is someone with many interests and creative pursuits. There's sort of a spectrum. And on one side, you've got the sequential multipotentialite at someone who kind of moves through their interests one at a time. And then on the other end of the spectrum, you've got the person with 20 different things on their plate. And you can exist anywhere along the spectrum. So there's no wrong way to be a multipotentialite. All that it means is that your life isn't just focused around a single thing, really.

Scott Anthony Barlow 08:13
Now, where on earth for yourself? Did you really start to discover this? That's what I'm really curious about, like, where is this coming to be?

Emilie Wapnick 08:23
Yeah. So it was something that used to bug me a lot that actually caused me a lot of stress in my life. For many, many years, I noticed that I kept becoming interested in something and like really diving in and making my whole identity about that thing, I'd be like, "Oh, I know what I'm going to do with my life, I'm going to be a musician or a web designer, or a lawyer" or whatever it was. And eventually, I would start to feel like either a sense of boredom or just that I wasn't being challenged as much, or I would just become interested in something else, and want to go explore that. And I viewed this as a bad thing for most of my life and worried what was wrong. I didn't know what was wrong with me, like, "Why can I stick with anything? Am I afraid of commitment? Like, what is going on? Do I not have like, you know, that one true calling we're all supposed to have?" So I was thinking about a lot of these sorts of questions. And it wasn't until my mid 20s, when I started, I sort of made the conscious decision to just flip it and make it a good thing and be like, this is how I am, I'm going to find a way to make it work. I'm going to see if there are other people out there like this who are making a living, who are successful. And that's where the idea for party like came about. And as I started blogging, I started meeting more people and started writing more and more about these ideas. And now I'm positively thrilled to be a multipotentialite and I see a lot of the benefits that I couldn't see before.

Scott Anthony Barlow 09:59
Well, this whole idea of multipotentialite, you said that, you really started flipping the switch in your 20s. What happened to caused you to flip the switch? Like you're back in your 20s, and, you know, you weren't looking at it, it doesn't sound like as a set of strengths before, what really happened to cause you to flip that switch?

Emilie Wapnick 10:22
Yeah, so I was actually, in my final semester of law school, and I pretty much knew that I didn't want to become a lawyer, just wasn't the life that I wanted for me. And so I was trying to figure out what I was going to do after I graduated. And I'd become interested in entrepreneurship and the idea of starting my own business. And I took a course on, you know, starting an online business. And of course, the second module was like, how to choose a niche, like, let's look through your interests and pick one and create a business around it. This is very difficult for me.

Scott Anthony Barlow 11:03
You see that?

Emilie Wapnick 11:03
Yeah. So, you know, I was making all these lists, and they all sounded like fun, but I didn't just want to pick one topic. And I was just racking my brain about this. And that's actually when I came up with the idea. I was like, you know, I've never really just done one thing. I've done a lot of freelancing and had, you know, kind of random jobs here and there. And I've always made it work. And I wonder if not choosing a niche could could be my thing. I wonder if I, you know, so I was actually thinking about coming up with a business that forced me to, like, really look at this pattern and see it for what it was and just make the decision to try and flip it. And, yeah, that's, and then, you know, a few months after launching the site, I put out this Manifesto, and a friend of mine another blogger was reviewing it, and he referred to us as multipotentialite and that's where the word came from. And it just stuck.

Scott Anthony Barlow 12:01
Interesting. Who was the other blogger? Just curious.

Emilie Wapnick 12:04
His name is Trevor Clark. I don't think he's blogging anymore. He's a multipotentialite. So last I heard he had like an artisan mushroom farm, like legit mushrooms, not like... but no, they were like selling them to fancy restaurants and stuff in Michigan. But I think he might not even be doing that anymore. I'm not sure what he's up to now, but always something interesting.

Scott Anthony Barlow 12:28
Yeah. Very cool. So some of that stuff was a little bit difficult to find, as I was looking through, so that's really interesting to hear it straight from you. Very cool. Now, so what happened from there? You got the idea for the business at some point and said, "Look, I'm gonna make this my thing." And how did you go about doing that?

Emilie Wapnick 12:53
I just started blogging, really, I got the site up, you know, hacked together. I hacked an old WordPress theme with some web design skills. I had acquired years earlier and started blogging. And people started reaching out to me and I started making connections with other bloggers and just kind of grew from there.

Scott Anthony Barlow 13:16
So was it really, I know you said, you're going through the course and everything like that, was it really intended to be like, your sole income, or if you want to call it that, from the beginning? Or was it, and I know, I'm asking the multipotentialite but what was the original intention?

Emilie Wapnick 13:35
Yeah, I mean, I think I was just thinking, like, I don't want to be a lawyer. So let's try this thing. And I did do some web design, just to sort of hold me over for about a year while the business was, you know, becoming profitable. But yeah, it's ironic. And I see the irony that, like, I'm a multipotentialite who has this one thing, but I'm like an expert at not being an expert at this point.

Scott Anthony Barlow 14:07
So I was wanting to ask you about that because it's sort of, I mean, it sort of is your thing, right? But it's not your only thing.

Emilie Wapnick 14:16
It's not my only thing. It's my thing right now. And I've always felt like I'm a bit more on the sequential side of the spectrum. So I really do tend to move to get very, very involved with something for several years, and then move on to something else, but I always have other projects and interests on the go. So and then the other thing is that, it is sort of my "specialty" but it's deceptively interdisciplinary. Because I get to write about work and career and business. I get to write about productivity. I get to read about confidence and like dealing with family members who don't understand or don't approve. There's so much that I can focus on and I can switch formats. I can write, I can speak, I can do video courses, I can run workshops. So I've found that even though it's like one thing, there's a lot of different things going on within it. And that's one of the tricks that I teach people, if you're, you know, considering your career, looking for something that's very interdisciplinary, or that just lets you wear a lot of different hats, that can be very fulfilling for multipotentialite.

Scott Anthony Barlow 15:26
Well. And I think that's what really what tied me over to, quite frankly, not tied me over that's probably the wrong way to say it, but that's what it kind of fills me up. Because I'm very much the same way. And I feel like I fall more towards that side of the spectrum as well. But, you know, in my business, I get to do all sorts of different things. It's not just one thing every day in one particular expertise. So I'm really curious about, I know you get into a little bit on your TED Talk. But I really wanted to ask you some questions about you've got these... you talk about these three different strengths. And I'm curious if you've identified more since then, and, two, wanted to have you talk about them a little bit. So you've got, you know, the first one that you end up talking about, is this whole idea of, idea synthesis, which part of what we were talking a little bit about.

Emilie Wapnick 16:21
It is, yeah, it's taking two or more fields and kind of smooshing them together and creating something new at the intersection.

Scott Anthony Barlow 16:32
Where do you see yourself doing that? Where did you first start seeing yourself doing that?

Emilie Wapnick 16:37
Oh, wow. I feel like I do that a lot. It's actually one of those things that seems to appeal to me about the different projects that I get involved in, like, they tend to be kind of interdisciplinary. I mean, gosh, when I was a kid, I used to do all kinds of weird multimedia things, like, I make little videos and put together plays and to try and figure out at the earliest time, I guess.

Scott Anthony Barlow 17:07
I love to be able to tell you that I've got one of these on to play for you, too.

Emilie Wapnick 17:13
Let's see, there was okay, one, very interesting venture as a child's... friend, and I set up a fortune telling origami stand in the park once, where we like, made these origami candy boxes and told fortunes, and didn't last very long. But there's a project that brings together a few different

Scott Anthony Barlow 17:34
Yeah, I would say so.

Emilie Wapnick 17:37
But no, I mean, I noticed in my work now, you know, like I mentioned before, my web design skills, like just years of freelancing came in handy when I was starting the site. And my law background came in handy when I was registering my trademark. And occasionally when I'm, you know, dealing with a contract or something, and my music backgrounds comes in handy. Well, I did a podcast very briefly, like in 2010. That's not not available anymore. But yeah, it came in handy then. And, you know, anytime I'm making videos, my film background kind of comes in and like lighting techniques. So there are definitely many skills that I apply laterally, that kind of come into the business and make it what it is.

Scott Anthony Barlow 18:26
So what about rapid learning? Because that's really, I mean, that's something that for a long, long time, I've always felt that has been a strength for me, long before I heard the word, you know, multipotentialite. But, tell me a little bit about that. And how you think about that, and why that's such a strength and where that actually comes from?

Emilie Wapnick 18:51
Well, I think there are a couple of things. So multipotentialite's tend to be really passionate, we tend to like get kind of obsessed with our new fascinations. And that drives us to just consume and just learn as much as we can about it. And also, there's the fact that like, the more you become... the more you're a beginner and you go through those awkward stages of like not being very good at something and then getting to be competent, the more confidence you have, and the quicker you are to acquire skills next time. So it's kind of like a muscle, like, the more you practice diving into something new and being like really bad at it and getting good, the faster that process becomes. It's kind of like, some people refer to it as meta learning. So just, you know, the ability to acquire skills more rapidly. And that stuff comes in handy if you're working for clients. And there's something else that they want done. If you can be like, oh, I can do that and just, you know, kind of dive in and learn it and do that for them and happy clients. They don't need to go anywhere else and, you know. And in various other ways, it's, yeah, I don't know, multipotentialite just love to learn. It's a very common thing.

Scott Anthony Barlow 20:10
So that's I mean, I get, I don't know, I probably get, like, between 30 and 40 emails a day with different types of questions. And usually one of the things that pops up, because a lot of things we talked about our strengths, you know, on our show and whatever else, but people are always people that I can tag as multipotentialite fairly quickly, they start out, "Well, I love to learn. And that's one of my strengths." And I see that again, and again, there's five or six other things that I see again, and again, and again, I didn't have the term until well, I don't know three weeks ago, when I started being bombarded multipotentialite, but it was interesting for me to watch your TEDx talk, and then say, "Hey, this is exactly what I'm getting, these are all the same characteristics, and all these same strengths, too." And and start to apply it and think about it through this lens that you're talking about. And then the other one is that you mentioned as well as adaptability. So can you explain that a little bit for us, and then want to ask you a little bit about that, too.

Emilie Wapnick 21:13
Sure. So adaptability is just the ability to morph into whatever you need to be in a given situation. So that is especially important in this day and age when, you know, the economic landscape is a lot less certain than it used to be. And things are just changing so quickly. So the ability to take on new roles to... it's kind of related to the learning new skills thing, but it's like you already have the skills and you just like, which version of me do I need to become to solve this problem or for this client or customer? Or, you know, whatever. So yeah, being adaptable is a huge advantage.

21:59
Maybe like three years, which just focused on trying to create this online business, kept failing, kept changing approaches, kept pivoting, never truly committing to one thing. And little did I asked like, "hey, do you even want an online business?"

Scott Anthony Barlow 22:13
Remember Matt from earlier? He made some changes on his own, but failed to ask the really important questions.

22:20
Yeah, to be totally honest, it was horrible, right? It's like waking up every day and wondering like, Okay, what am I going to do today? And what are my goals? It's basically waking up and kind of feeling lost and analyzing over and over again, and coming to the same answers.

Scott Anthony Barlow 22:36
Making a bunch of pivots wasn't all bad for him, though.

22:39
The light in that as I gained different skills, especially people skills throughout the whole time.

Scott Anthony Barlow 22:44
We coached Matt to help them realize what his strengths were and how to take actions based on those.

22:49
Those tests that you had me go through were fantastic in terms of like, okay, yeah, here are my strengths. Yeah, that makes sense that really true. And then that kind of just gives you again, that confidence boost to take action. to do something.

Scott Anthony Barlow 23:01
Congratulations, Matt, in building a business in a life that you love. If you also want to figure out what work fits you and find that fulfilling career that gets you up in the morning, lights you up, gives you purpose, well find out how coaching can help you step by step, go over to happentoyourcareer.com and click on coaching to apply, or you can text, MYCOACH to 44222. Pause right now, and we'll send over the application.

23:29
The more that you can double down on your health or wellness, the better. That will go back to effectiveness and efficiency of how you run your business.

Scott Anthony Barlow 23:40
Where do you see that for yourself then? Like how do you think about that for yourself? And maybe there's something projects or clients, customers, whatever that you've got going on right now, where adaptability really ends up helping you in that way.

Emilie Wapnick 23:54
Well, I do a little bit of coaching. And usually it's people who want to come up with a business idea that is a little bit more multifaceted, and lets them bring in their various interests. And we talked about overarching themes and stuff. But I've got a student now who just saw my TED Talk and just wanted to work with me and say, "I'm particularly interested in building an online business or anything" or you know, starting Renaissance business or anything like that. And so we just started doing a lot of like deep work and figuring out what drives them and helping them come up with a title that they can, you know, they can say when someone asks them what they do, and just working on some of the other things that I don't usually get to go into in coaching but I feel like my interest in psychology and self help if you will, and all kinds of stuff really came in.

Scott Anthony Barlow 24:51
They just showed up on your door after seeing your TED Talk. How can I pay you money so that I can work with you and clearly the TED Talk is working.

Emilie Wapnick 25:00
Yeah, it's been amazing. I mean, I've heard, I've gotten so many wonderful emails, and it's just been a little overwhelming, but incredible.

Scott Anthony Barlow 25:10
Yeah. And that's fantastic. And I think it's well deserved. By the way, if you've listened to the show at all, you know, by now that you can go to happentoyourcaree.com, and then we'll have all the links, we'll put the TED Talk up in the show notes so that you can actually see what we keep alluding to over and over and over again. And you can see what got sent to me 472, it's just gonna go out by the end of the episode, it's be like 1,010.

Emilie Wapnick 25:36
Your listeners should email you right now, and say "Hey, have you seen this TED Talk?"

Scott Anthony Barlow 25:43
That's probably what's gonna happen. Probably gonna get a bunch of emails saying, "Can you see the TED Talk?" So I, okay, so you work with clients on a regular basis, and you go through and you're helping them with some of this deeper level stuff, or in some of the not as deeper level stuff, like, what do you even call yourself? How have you been referred to? Actually, before I asked this question, I'm curious, what do you, when people ask what you do, what is it that you say, Emilie?

Emilie Wapnick 26:20
I'm trying to have different things. Usually I'll say, I run an online community. And then they'll ask me, "What kind of online community?" And then I'll be like, "It's a site for multipotentialite." There are people with many interests in creative pursuits. And then either they'll be like, "Oh, okay." Or they'll be like, "Huh, that's interesting. Tell me more." And then we'll have a conversation.

Scott Anthony Barlow 26:42
That, yeah, you get that dividing line right there.

Emilie Wapnick 26:45
Yeah. It depends why they're asking if they're like, just being polite, or if they're actually interested.

Scott Anthony Barlow 26:50
Yeah, exactly. That is interesting. So you don't list out like all the 52 things that you're interested in?

Emilie Wapnick 27:01
I don't. Sometimes if I meet someone in a particular context, I might lead with something I might say, I'm a writer or something. But, or if I'm talking to a crossing guard, I usually say, I'm a web designer, because that makes more sense to them. But, like someone at the border or whatever.

Scott Anthony Barlow 27:21
Well, what then, since you do work with clients and everything like that, like what do you recommend to people in the situation where they're clearly identifying with being a multipotentialite? And they're really trying to figure out, you know, how do I decide what to do first, because regardless of which end of the spectrum, you swing to, at least this is how I'm thinking about it. And regardless of which end of the spectrum, you swing to, whether you're 20 projects all at one time, or whether you're more sequential, you've got to still choose to do one, at least start one thing at a time, you can't start 1500 things all at the exact time, you could try, but it doesn't get you anywhere necessarily. How do you help people think about that differently? Because this is the question I know that our listeners are going to ask and this is a question I get regularly.

Emilie Wapnick 28:15
Yeah. So usually, we do some brainstorming, and I have them write out a long list of things that they're interested in. Sometimes we'll do you know, the list of things that they've done before, things they've enjoyed, things that they're becoming curious about. But in this context, I would say you know, put all of your different ideas down on paper. And then try and decide on like two to four things that are really pulling at your heart right now that you just like really want to dive into and start there. And more things will come up, and you can add those to your backburner list. And if you're really dying to jump into something new, you know, get some work done on one of your priority projects first, and then set a timer for like 40 minutes and just go down the rabbit hole and have fun and like, because I think people sometimes feel like, if I start any one thing, then I'm giving up on everything else, you're not going to be able to, you know, and that can be really paralyzing. So it can be helpful to like give yourself some freedom to actually just go ahead and explore whatever you want, but set a timer. So you know, it's not going to just take over your whole day. And then get back to the few things that you've decided to focus on. And then you can kind of find that right number for you in terms of like which projects, how many you want, like, on your stovetop, right? I like the stovetop analogy because you've got like four things on the go. One is boiling high, and the other one is just simmering you kind of like tend to one and then tend to another but you can handle four or so without going crazy. So yeah, I usually have people start there like two to four, and see what feels right and go from there.

Scott Anthony Barlow 29:59
Two to four things that you're diving into. And what about timeframes? Because that's one of the things that I get questions on all the time. And I'm just curious on your outlook on that. So let's say that they end up diving into, I don't know, two different things, you know, how long do they spend there? And what does that depend on? And how do you think about that?

Emilie Wapnick 30:22
Yeah, it depends on the person, and on the project. Some projects are the kind of projects where you can work a little bit on it every day. Other projects are more of intensive, like, once a year, a friend and I try and get together in a city and write and record an album in a month. We've done it a couple times now. And that is a project we're like, just having one month and really going hard works for us and for the project and makes it possible. We, you know, logistically, it would be really difficult because we live in different cities to just kind of have a band and practice regularly and do all that. But we don't want to like give up playing music. So we do this intensive thing. And it's a lot of fun to just kind of write an album. But there are other interests, that it's really a matter of like practicing everyday, like if you're learning a language maybe. And yeah, so people organize their time differently. Some people will do like the high school subjects schedule like, I forget how everybody should call it, something like that the high school schedule method where you like, break up your day, and you're like, from this hour to this hour, I'm going to work on this project, from this hour to this hour, I'll work on this project and kind of break up your day that way. Other people will dedicate one day to a particular thing, then the next day will be a difference project they're working on. Some people will go by the week, it really depends on how you like to work and what your projects are like.

Scott Anthony Barlow 31:59
That's really interesting. Just coming off, do you know Mike Vardy?

Emilie Wapnick 32:04
Yes.

Scott Anthony Barlow 32:04
So Mike obviously really recommends the theme days, right. So that's part of his thing. But that layering in here is that's fresh on my mind a little bit, but I think that could work very much too, or sometimes even breaks into like, half the day. And then that's a little bit what I hear you talking about, to some degree, and I think that that can be very, very effective. But what I also hear you saying is you've got to pay attention to you, and the way that makes sense for how you work, how you're wired, etc, etc. Is that kind of right? Am I interpreting that correctly?

Emilie Wapnick 32:39
Yeah, definitely. And also, you know, paying attention to what times of day you're most creative and kind of trying as much as you can to fit your more intensive creative projects into those periods where you've got a lot of focus and you know, and then the like, maybe some email checking when you're feeling less clear, and just kind of being aware of like your energy levels throughout the day and yeah.

Scott Anthony Barlow 33:11
So your one month, once a year recording project, is that tip of the hat or is that...?

Emilie Wapnick 33:16
It is. Yeah. We've got... we really do for another album, we've got one that's almost done with the mastering and should be out pretty soon, it takes forever the mixing master. It's mostly our fault. It's not our engineers or producers fault but, and then we'll probably do another one in the spring.

Scott Anthony Barlow 33:38
Very cool. Comes out... are you selling this too, or like how can we get a hold of this, Emilie? I kind of want to hear it.

Emilie Wapnick 33:49
Yeah, you can just go to tipofthehat.bandcamp.com. And I think we've got a 4 bucks for the first EP or pay what you want. And probably the, you know, future records will just be pay what you want, because I like that model. And it's not we made a lot of money off of the first one anyway. So it's more just for us and just stick any get our music out there.

Scott Anthony Barlow 34:14
So closing up, I know we're starting to run out a little bit of time here. But I'm really wanted to want just ask you about what is the biggest or most common questions you get from multipotentialites or even the most common challenges that you get. And then I would ask as kind of a follow up, where do you urge people to start with some of those challenges?

Emilie Wapnick 34:40
Yeah, that's a great question. Usually, it's about making a living as a multipotentialite. That is probably the biggest challenge that people have. And there just aren't that many good resources out there like there aren't that many career guides written for multipotentialite to, you know, help them get or design a career that includes a lot of variety, that's just not really, and you know, career counselors, there are some cool ones out there. But largely, it's like, let's look at your skills and interests and narrow it down, not broaden it out, give you a few different options. But, so yeah, the like, how to make a living question is a big one. And multipotentialite, you know, they want to be able to pay the bills, they also want to be able to dip into their many skills, and it kind of express the breadth of who they are. And they want to do something that feels meaningful as well. So yeah, those you know, finding, putting together a career that includes those three elements is a big one.

Scott Anthony Barlow 35:51
You picked a heck of a set of questions, right? Now you got to try and answer like, how do you make a living? Man, no pressure.

Emilie Wapnick 36:00
Well, I'm writing a book about that right now. Basically, you need a life and career that provides you with variety, and there are several different ways to get this. I don't know if you have the time for me to go into this.

Scott Anthony Barlow 36:15
And let's please, let's dive into it. I can make more time, if you can make a little more time.

Emilie Wapnick 36:20
Yeah, sure. So right now I'm writing a book on this exact topic. And I've interviewed dozens of people who kind of self described as being both happy and financially comfortable and multipotentialites. And I asked them this question, and it turns out that none of them make money in the same way. And there's no, unfortunately, there's no one career that is just like perfect for multipotentialites. But there are some commonalities, and I believed four commonly used work models. So I can go through those quickly, if you like.

Scott Anthony Barlow 36:57
Yeah, let's do it.

Emilie Wapnick 36:58
Okay, so the first commonly used work model is what I call the, 'group hug approach'. And this is like what we were talking about before, it's if you can imagine all of your interests coming together in one big group hug. So this is like the job where you get to wear many different hats. Maybe you're working at a smaller company or a startup, and you just get more input, more, you know, creative input. Or it's a business that is multifaceted, where you get to shift between different formats and write about a lot of different topics. That's the group hug approach. The second approach, the second commonly used work model is what I call the 'slash approach'. And this is where you've got several distinct and separate revenue streams. So maybe you have two narrow businesses that are very different, you're not combining anything, they've got different audiences, maybe you've got a couple part time jobs. And you love them both for different reasons. But you wouldn't want to do one full time you kind of like being able to just switch to a different part of your brain. Maybe you sell your art, or you do some sort of performance, and you just kind of have these separate revenue streams. And altogether, you get a sense of variety. And this works really well for people who love shifting between radically different parts of their brains on a regular basis. And then there's the what I call the, 'Einstein approach.' And that's because Albert Einstein worked at the patent office, he actually was employed by the government. And this was a notoriously slow paced job. So it provided him with stability and security. But it didn't take up too much of his free time or creative energy. So he had all that free time to work on his theories. So this is, you know, a stable day job that you enjoy, that does not completely drain you and leaves you with free time to explore your other passions on the side. And this works very well for some people, some people are really happy with it. I think the risk here is if you have a job that is not quite the good enough job, and it really like sucks you, you can't really go home and want to like work on your projects, you're just exhausted.

Scott Anthony Barlow 39:17
There's a fine line there.

Emilie Wapnick 39:18
Yeah, that's not ideal. And then the fourth commonly used work model is the 'sequential approach'. And this is where you dive into a field for six months, or several years. And you just kind of build a career in that field. And then you shift to an entirely new field and you dive into that for a long time. And all these work models can be mixed and matched and a lot of us are hybrids, but I found it helpful for people to just kind of delineate them and to show you your options. But I never want to tell people like here are the four work models now choose one because that goes counter to my message

Scott Anthony Barlow 39:57
That seems like counter to everything you...

Emilie Wapnick 40:00
So these are some ideas and you know, pick and choose what works for you, mix them together, whatever.

Scott Anthony Barlow 40:06
Well, I think it really could be too, and I think in reality like as you're going through different seasons of your life, two different things may make sense at different times like I think about. So we've got three little kids, right, and what... before we had three little kids what made sense for me totally does not make sense as in the same way for me now. That's really interesting. Group hug, Einstein. I like the names. I love the names.

Emilie Wapnick 40:30
Thanks. I'm, you know, one of my like, little weird passions is inventing words, clearly, which is another thing that I've integrated into my business. So, yeah, I like making up names and you know, smooshing words together and stuff.

Scott Anthony Barlow 40:50
Have you met Jonathan Harrison?

Emilie Wapnick 40:52
I don't think so.

Scott Anthony Barlow 40:53
I might have to introduce you to him. He has also made up a few words in his day. Awesome guy, but he helped us get started way back when and finally got to meet the guy in person not that long ago. But he runs a gamer's website on leadership, for two things that you normally don't smash together.

Emilie Wapnick 41:17
Interesting. Yeah, I like that.

Scott Anthony Barlow 41:18
Yeah, I know. It's cool. But yeah, you'll have to... you'd like him quite a bit.

Emilie Wapnick 41:24
That's cool. I'm gonna check that out.

Scott Anthony Barlow 41:26
Yeah. It's called classically trained.

Emilie Wapnick 41:29
Cool.

Scott Anthony Barlow 41:30
Shout out to Jonathan Harrison.

Emilie Wapnick 41:33
That's one of the things when I'm working with people to come up with a business idea. Often we're like, "Okay, what if we took knowledge from one of your interests? And we brought that knowledge to an audience related to a different interest of yours? Like, is there anything there that could be useful?" So it sounds like that's kind of what he's done.

Scott Anthony Barlow 41:52
Oh, yeah. He's done a really fantastic job with it. Yeah, you'll definitely have to check it out. We'll put links to that in the show notes too. Well, I would say that I'm really... I want to read the book now.

Emilie Wapnick 42:03
I better write today.

Scott Anthony Barlow 42:04
You better write today. That is amazing. Is there anything else that you're working on besides the book right now that you want to share with us? And then also, you know, as people that have listened to this and are just really excited, because they just found out their multipotentialite, where can they connect up with you?

Emilie Wapnick 42:25
Sure. So let's see, what's going on. The book, so I started running retreats. Well, we've done one, we did the first putty retreat was here in Portland at the end of September. And we just announced the second one, which is going to be in the UK in June. So I'm very excited about those. It's really fun. We get you know, 10, 15, multipotentialites in a house together for a weekend and we brainstorm and we co work and it's a lot of fun. So that's coming up. We're gonna be doing some speaking, just kind of, yeah, getting stuff, you know, figure it out for the next year. But there's some definitely some big speaking things coming up. Yeah, that's... and then the book is going to be a lot of work, but I'm excited about it. And people can find me and my work at puttylike.com.

Scott Anthony Barlow 43:21
Well, hey, and go over there and check it out. I've been on the site, it's very cool, especially if you even remotely identify with the multipotentialite definition that we've been talking about here. Go check it out. And thank you so much for making the time. I really appreciate it. This has been awesome.

Emilie Wapnick 43:38
Yeah, thanks so much for having me. It's been fun.

Scott Anthony Barlow 43:41
Hey, hope you really enjoyed this. And I would say that if you want to actually see the full interview and the slides that go along with it, well, we recorded this as a video. So all you have to do is go over to happentoyourcareer.com/220. And that'll take you right to the page where we've got the video embedded right on there, you can watch that. You can also, if you've already bought her book, send us a copy of the receipt and we'll actually send you a bonus PDF that accompanies the entire thing. So plenty of bonuses, head on over to happentoyourcareer.com/220. I think you're going to love the interview. It's even better when you watch it on video. All right, we'll see you over there. Next week on Happen To Your Career, we get to dive deep into a topic that many people don't talk about. What if you don't paint? Or what if you aren't necessarily an artist, but you have a desire to create, and you are a creative person or maybe even a creative thinker? How do you get a job and what types of jobs, what types of roles are available for creative thinkers just like you? Especially ones that pay more than, you know, pennies. And how do you make those happen? So that's what we're gonna dive into next week. I think that you're going to absolutely love it. Join us right here next week on Happen To Your Career for so much more when we talk about careers for creative thinkers. We'll see you then. Until then, I'm out. Adios.

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Get Unstuck, Find a New Career Path with Kathryn Minshew

THERE ARE WAYS TO GET  UNSTUCK

KATHRYN MINSHEW

Starting the career search process can be intimidating, especially since the first thing any job search website asks for is WHAT? Like you’re supposed to know what job title you want in the first place?

When you don’t know what career path you want to take, the process is not only hard to get started, it can be paralyzing when you don’t have all of the answers. Just thinking about a career change causes stress, anxiety, frustration, and fear to rise inside many people because the majority feel stuck and unsure of what to do first.

But, there’s a way to get unstuck.

You have to be willing to change your mindset and approach your career change differently than you have before.

If you’re willing to do that, all you need now it to make the time and energy to get you through the journey.

Below, we’ve outlined tips from Kathryn Minshew, CEO and Co-Founder of The Muse, a career discovery platform that “puts the human at the center” and helps over 50+ million people a year in their career search.

Now, pull out a notebook and let’s get you started down the right path to get you unstuck and find your new career path.

HOW-TO GET UNSTUCK

Also known as getting out of the Figure It Out Limbo

STEP ONE: Layout your list of values

Ask yourself what you value most in a career.

Do you value your independence, creativity, management-style, flexibility in schedule? Or maybe you’re the type that values prestige, compensation, stability, or career advancement? Whatever it is that you value, write it down and make a list of what is most important because this will help you get closer to determining your new career path.

STEP TWO: Look to your friends, family, and co-workers for their honest opinion

Ask five friends/family/co-workers for their professional observation of when they have seen you at your happiest? What kind of work have they seen you do that absolutely lights you up?

The people closest to you only want to see you succeed and it could be anything from planning and scheduling parties with friends and family, to executing and leading projects.

Getting a more distant, outsider opinion in what kind of environment you thrive in will be beneficial in putting together the framework of your next career.

STEP THREE: Research and assessing the variety of paths against your values

You’ll want to take your list of values from STEP ONE and the opinions that you’ve gathered in STEP TWO and do some research to come up with a list of careers that best match your findings from STEP ONE and STEP TWO.

This part is similar to the scientific method.

Take your theory of career paths and test them against the career values that you’ve listed in STEP ONE and see how well they work. Your goal is to be able to approve or disprove the career paths that you’ve narrowed down for yourself.

The important part of this step is being able and willing to disprove the potential careers that you’ve chosen for yourself.

Once you’ve gone through the steps, you’re now able to take a closer look at the career path that best fits your needs and your values.

Now you’re ready to move on to the “Test Drive” method.

STEP FOUR: Test-Driving Potential Career Paths

What does is mean to “test-drive” your career path?

Essentially, you’re just dipping your toe in the pool of the career you’ve got your heart set on before committing to high-diving into the the deep end.

HERE ARE EXAMPLES OF “TEST-DRIVING” A CAREER FROM KATHRYN (FROM MOST INTENSE TO LEAST):

1. An internship – Whether you’re just getting out of school or are in-between jobs, an internship requires at least a 3-month dedication, but you’re in the trenches at that point getting to know the job position (hopefully at a company and industry you’re looking to get into)

2. Volunteering – Like an internship, you can volunteer your skills for a certain period of time to get that “on-the-job” feel at an organization of your choice. Volunteering is a great choice, since most organizations will let you do the work if you can outline your skills tailored to their needs.

3. Informational Interviews – This is your chance to ask all of the questions about the job. Ask the good, but also ask about the bad. Ask about the parts of the job that are mundane, tedious, and not so glamorous.

4. On-the-job Shadowing – If you can find an organization that gives the green light and you’ve got the time, shadowing someone throughout their daily routine is a great way to see it in action. Ask those questions and get all the information about the position as you can!

YOU FEEL LIKE IF YOU SWITCH CAREERS, YOU’VE LOST EVERYTHING – LOST EVERYTHING YOU WORKED FOR, YOU LOST THAT EXPERIENCE, [LIKE] IT WAS WASTED […..] NOT IF YOU FOCUS ON WHAT I HAVE LEARNEDWHERE HAVE I GROWNWHAT SKILLS HAVE I DEVELOPED.

 KATHRYN MINSHEW

The career search process is more of an endurance run and not a sprint. This is a BIG life change that we’re talking about.

Once you have done the work of laying out your values and following the steps that Kathryn has mapped out for you to narrow down your new career path, don’t be afraid to test it out. When you’re looking for a new career, it’s definitely something that you want to be sure that you can sustain.

If you need help getting your career search started or need a little more direction before you start testing out your potential career paths, we’ve got the solution for you! Just apply for our coaching and we’ll set you up with one of our career coaches that can help you highlight your experiences and frame them in a way that will lead you down a more structured career search.

Head on over to www.happentoyourcareer.com/coaching to work with one of our coaches and figure out your new career path!

At the end of the day, if you know deep in your heart that this is not the right path, it is easier than ever before to change to a new path. NOT easy, but easier than before and possible.

-Kathryn Minshew
Guest: KATHRYN MINSHEW

TheMuse.com

https://www.kminshew.com/

The New Rules of Work: The Modern Playbook for Navigating Your Career

Social Media
Twitter: @kmin
Kathryn on Linkedin

Scott Barlow: How do you describe what you do these days?

Kathryn Minshew: That is a great question. The main thing I do is work on The Muse. I like to describe The Muse as people’s trusted and beloved place to navigate your career. I started the company five and a half years ago and we serve over fifty million people every year across the United States. Over 700 companies use us for employer branding, hiring, and to reach great people. The idea for The Muse was what if you created a career platform that put the human at the center that helped people figure out what they want to do and go get it; the job, promotion, or negotiate the raise. Then help them succeed in the career they have, be more fulfilled, acquire skills, and develop relationships at the office. After several years working at TheMuse.com my co-founder and I decided to wrap it up into a book which comes out on April 18th.

Scott Barlow: I have a copy and have read through most of it. I really enjoyed it. I cherry picked some of the parts that I was particularly interested in and was pleasantly surprised. We will get into all of that. I’m curious about your career first and want to dive into it because you have an interesting story of how you got to here. You have The Muse now but it wasn’t always that way. Right? You started your career in a drastically different place. You thought you’d go some other directions but it didn’t turn out how you thought. Where does this start for you?

Kathryn Minshew: I grew up in Washington D.C. We moved there when I was eleven. I decided quickly that my career was going to be in Foreign Service or international relations. As I grew up I was absolutely in love with the idea of being an ambassador, Foreign Service Officer, an international women of mystery. I don’t know if you watched the show “Alias” but Jennifer Garner played this badass heroin that spoke a bunch of languages and that was as comfortable kicking ass and working for the CIA as she was at a high end cocktail party. I remember thinking I could do that, that could be my career. It didn’t work out like that which I am grateful for.

After studying political science, learning French and Turkish, and traveling I had an opportunity working at the United States Embassy in Nicosia, Cyprus on the Regional Security Team. It was an incredible experience but not what I expected. I realized that the idea of a Foreign Service career didn’t match the reality. It set me into a massive period of career exploration. I thought about different paths, skill sets, and functions and spent a lot of time on job boards. I ended up taking a job at McKenzie Company as a consultant. I learned a lot but it wasn’t the right long term path. As I was thinking about what was next it struck me how insufficient a lot of the existing career tools were. Here is one example from when I was thinking about business strategy jobs. I went to a major job board. They all start with a giant blank search box which is frankly an intimidating place to start.

Scott Barlow: It’s depressing.

Kathryn Minshew: Exactly, because unless you are exactly sure what title you want it’s a terrible place to begin. I had no idea what to type in the box. Business strategy director is what I entered. The first job that came back was “assistant store manager” at 7-Eleven in Secaucus New Jersey. I remember thinking, you have got to be kidding me. This is ridiculous. It’s from that experience and the whole host of experiences that I started thinking about the concepts and ideas that would become The Muse. We didn’t get it right the first time, but my co-founder Alex and I essentially started a project that eventually become a company. It was a career advice related community, a blog platform for professional women. It didn’t really work out and it was ten months that was some of the hardest of my life but we learned core lessons. When we launched The Muse, Alex, Melissa and I, in 2011, we were ready. It’s been a wild ride. The timing was perfect because people were looking for what we were offering.

Scott Barlow: Let me ask you a few things. Let me go back to Cyprus. What were some red flag indicators that happened while you were there that got you thinking it wasn’t what you were after?

Kathryn Minshew: I was aware intellectually that a lot of Foreign Service work is fairly bureaucratic. There are a lot of people involved and progress is measured in inches. The reality of that set in while in Cyprus. I loved my co-workers and boss but they kept saying this field requires incredible amounts of patience. I realized I’m very action oriented. I like trying, experimenting, and failing and you can’t do that in international diplomacy. It’s challenging to try and fail because the consequences are on a large stage and trust is built over decades not just years, months, or days. Something else that struck me were the possibilities for advancement based on age. When you look at the State Department for example, if we are negotiating a trade deal or policy agreement or defusing an international crisis with counterparts in the United Kingdom, Russia, wherever it is: What would the perception be on the other side if you send a twenty-five, twenty-eight, or thirty-two year old in a senior position? It might not be good.

It was frustrating because I realized it doesn’t matter how smart, or talented you are, or how hard you work there are certain positions you won’t be able to serve in especially in a front facing capacity until you are a certain age. Not because your abilities or the intrinsic desires of the State Department but simply because if another country is going to make an assumption based on your age that has to be taken into consideration. I could go on but I had colleagues telling me, look you seem smart and driven don’t join the State Department right away. Do something else first. Go join the private sector for ten years then come back in your mid-thirties and you’ll have a great career here then.

I remember thinking that is great advice, thank you. It makes sense and I realized that there are a lot of places you can climb, move, or take on positions more quickly. Age is a factor, because there are times still, and I’m in my early thirties, where people say I seem young. Certain fields have structural challenges, more than others. That was one that might be a challenge for me.

Scott Barlow: You looked at yourself and said okay, some of these things aren’t lining up, a few are missing. You chose to pay attention to that. I see and have talked to so many people that know that and are aware of it. You’ve even sent us many people from the muse, many are listening right now and they haven’t acted on that. Question one is why did you chose to act on that, maybe because you are action oriented, any other reasons? What can other people do to not ignore that?

Kathryn Minshew: I’ll take them in reverse. I think a helpful activity is to look ahead at your boss and your boss’s boss. People that are in your path three, five, ten years down the road and ask yourself do I really want that job and am I willing to do what it takes day in and day out to get there. That can be eye opening because the career can seem glamorous from afar but when you are in the trenches you aren’t sure it’s where you want to end up or if the day to day requirements are worth getting there.

For me personally, I think I was fairly willing to accept that maybe I’d been wrong. Many people fall into that trap. They want something so bad, they work hard towards it then they finally get it and realize it isn’t right. What is hard is you feel a little like an idiot. I know from personal experience. I’d been telling people it was my goal. I had scarified and got to step one and there was a clear path ahead of me and there are voices in our culture that say you owe it to yourself to keep going or it would be embarrassing to stop now. I’m the kind of person that ignores those and says it’s better to get off the wrong path now. You feel like if you switch careers you have lost everything you’ve worked for, you lose the experience, and feel that it was wasted. People have said that to me, like aren’t you afraid you wasted all that time, especially when I was in the thick of it.

The experiences have informed so much of what I’ve done. You focus on what have I learned, where have I grown, and what skills have I developed. It’s not a loss, but it’s still hard.

What we wanted to do with the book “The New Rules of Work”, and themuse.com is to help people feel more supported and comfortable making those big changes. It is scary but if you know it’s not the right long term path it’s better to make a move sooner rather than later. The exception to that is if you can say, if I invest two more years I can get to x point and that will generally allow me to make a lateral move to y where I want to go. That is reasonable.

In the book we encourage people to look at your values, not what your parents and friends want you to do. Does the path line up? For me there was more I wanted from my career. It wasn’t an easy process. I sat on my coach for hours with books, papers, and charts. I was trying to get structure around the decision. I cried a couple times. At the end of the day if you know in your heart that it isn’t the right path it is easier than ever before to change to a new path. Not easy, but easier than before, and possible. That was part of the experience for me that made me passionate about helping other people make the same change.

Scott Barlow: Here’s what I love about that. And a little behind the scenes. Kathryn has been such a trooper because her voice is waning and she is still pushing through. You said in the book, “One of the new rules you prescribed is your education and skills gave you the experiences that brought you were you are today, but your past is a platform to spring forward from and not a ball and chain.” The opposite side of that is that many of us say if we change now that we are losing everything that was put in place that we worked for, that we have emotion invested in. When I read that I thought of sunk cost theory. All the emotion that goes into that causes you to make decisions that aren’t necessarily good for you going forward just because what has happened in the past or what you perceived you put in. I love that you are releasing us from that versus trying to say you must keep going down that track.

Kathryn Minshew: Absolutely. Sometimes it just helps to have someone tell you there is another way. It doesn’t make it easy but it is possible to take a foundation of experiences, learnings, education, goals and change to another path and goal. Leverage what you have learned and use it and look back in five or ten years and say I don’t know if I’d be as good as what I do now if I didn’t have those experiences in another field that others may think are tangential or wasted.

Scott Barlow: Let me ask you a little about the going forward piece. Like you I spent hours and hours sitting with books, charts, and excel spreadsheets. That is the type of person I am. We have that in common. What can someone do if they are really struggling? How can they get started if they are in this figuring it out limbo?

Kathryn Minshew: This is the focus of the first third of the book. I’ll try to summarize it. First start to layout a list of your values. We have a process called The Muse Method. At its core it’s about what do you value? For example, a person who values autonomy, independence, flexibility, and creativity will have a different ideal path than someone who values prestige, compensation, and stability. All of these things can be good but you have to ask what is most important to you. You can use your friends, family and colleagues to help. I love suggesting finding five people you respect, at least two to three you’ve worked with closely and ask them when they have seen you most focused and happy. What sort of activities do you feel I enjoy and lights me up professionally? You don’t have to worry about a path.

I loved reading about international relations, history, and discussing politics. But those aren’t the functions you play in a day to day job. Is it interacting with others, having control of what I do and when, or diving deep into numbers and coming up with insights from the analysis others haven’t seen? You can start thinking about yourself but also getting outside input to understand tasks and functions you enjoy and values that are important.

We help people run through a method of researching and assessing paths against those values. It’s basically the scientific method. You have a hypothesis and you have to go collect information to prove or disprove it. You have to be able to disprove. You can say I want to be a branding consultant. But using Alex as an example, she wanted to do this but when she sat down with someone at a major global consumer package goods organization they talked about how the team had spent time deciding between twenty shades of blue and she realized that would drive her up the wall. It’s not that the other person loved that part of the job but they could deal with it.

I think there is a theory that the good things are good generically but you want to think about the bad parts. What is the negative part that you are okay with? That you say it’s not my favorite but I get it versus what would really hurt and hold you back. There is a more complicated process in the book. I hope those tips help people see there are ways to get unstuck.

Scott Barlow: I’m curious about the values piece for you. What are some of the biggest values for you as you’ve progressed through your career even back in Cyprus or as you made progression doing some of the projects, and had growth where it didn’t work out as you anticipated? What values did you learn about yourself? What was most important to you along the way?

Kathryn Minshew: First, my day to day matters intensely. It’s not necessarily true for everyone. Some of the people I worked with at the State Department or World Health Organization in Geneva were able to be fixated on the larger mission of their work and organization that could obscure day to day frustrations. For me, I am action oriented, and I love to feel like things are happening moving and being pushed forward. A startup is a good fit for that reason. I love to feel like I’m constantly learning so when I do the same thing over and over again it starts driving me up the wall even if I enjoyed it in the past. I valued a career where my day to day would vary, where I would be constantly pushed and stretched, and made a little uncomfortable. I really value autonomy and control meaning that I will work ninety hours a week without complaint for The Muse but I like to know that I decide when I am working. I’ve been frustrated in previous roles when someone said I’m going to need you to stay in the office until this time or when I thought I was going to get out early and someone else arbitrarily decided I needed to stay late. It’s one thing when I decide or if the work is important and needs done. That is very easy, but I’m probably less patient than a normal person at feeling like someone else is trying to control how I spend my time and energy.

Scott Barlow: So no, “I’m going to need you to come in on Saturday” for you?

Kathryn Minshew: I can make myself come in on Saturday but it’s hard to hear it from your figurative Office Space style boss.

Scott Barlow: I’m the same way. It’s probably how I ended up in CEO roles in the past too. I can identify with that. A couple other things. You mention in the book, I’m flipping to the page, you mention test driving your career paths and I wanted to dig into that a little because I think it’s incredibly important. We get this hypothesis and people latch on to it like it is the thing and I’ll be awesome but they get there and are depressed because it wasn’t what they thought it would be. A different approach is required. You prescribe that too so what do you mean by test driving and how do people start doing that?

Kathryn Minshew: it depends on the career path but there are different ways to dip your toe in the pool before you face plant into the new career. It’s so important because once you are in it, it is harder to make a change. Not impossible but it’s better to know ahead of time. Let me start with the most intense to the easiest paths. On the more intense spectrum, if you are a student or at an age or place where it still makes sense, interns can be useful because they are temporary. No one will look at you like you were there too short of a time because it’s expected. It’s a low risk way but you sacrifice some comp. I encourage people if they aren’t sure to go that route because you get a trial period.

Similarly one of the stories we tell in the book, one of our friends was interested in moving into social media, she was active personally and thought it might leverage a lot of creativity that she didn’t have in her current job. She started by finding a small business or nonprofit and asked if she could work with them for three months on their social presence. She showed examples of what she would do. Someone gave her the chance. Put out a picture for a business on how you can help them. She found doing it nights, weekends, and on her lunch hour that some things she found were unexpected that she didn’t love. At the same time if she did decide to pursue it she has experience while not quitting her full time paying job. That is an intense way to test drive a new career.

Some less intense ways are informational interviews. Sit down with someone in your path and ask what they do during a day, what sort of people would love the job, who would hate it, and what are some of the worst things they deal with. What does it take to overcome those? These interviews can be valuable but you have to focus not just on the positive but on the grind and tough stuff. The right person will help you. When we started profiling employees on themuse.com and company profiles I wanted to get the feel of taking an informational interview online. If you are looking for an example, say you want to switch into sales or engineering, we have thousands of employees profiled online and you can listen to their videos if you don’t have someone directly to talk to. The combination of in person and online research can give you a sense of what a career is like. Go past the high level and hear about, for sales, the day to day rejection and decide if you are okay with that.

Some businesses will let people shadow for a day or week. If you have flexibility do that and step into the shoes of a future career. I know it seems like a lot of work and not everyone can do it. It depends on your current role, financial situation, and where you are in your career. One of the reasons I encourage people to think about it is the time spent up front - a week, couple days, a few months - if it saves you making a wrong move it’s a good thing.

Scott Barlow: I really appreciate that. We spend a lot of time on our show and company teaching these pieces. That is phenomenal. Two more quick questions. I appreciate you practicing what you preach even when it is hard, losing your voice and all. Kudos for practicing that.

Kathryn Minshew: I hope people know I don’t normally sound like this.

Scott Barlow: You still sound decent. No one would probably know if I hadn’t said anything. That is a dovetail into the next thing. The book is “The New Rules of Work: The Modern Playbook for Navigating Your Career.” There is good stuff in it. One off the wall question. I know you have seen a lot of changes in terms of what work even looks like, and will look like, and with that we’ve seen how you go about getting work and how it changes and the new rules of work. How long do you think before these rules continue to evolve?

Kathryn Minshew: I honestly believe they are evolving every day. There are major changes with each new technology. Google Hangouts and Skype are used differently today than three or five years ago. As the next things develop and generation Z enters the workplace it will change. My personal take is generally within a three year window, there is 80% consistency because people are resistant to deeper change. You can assume that if something held true two years ago, especially around human to human interactions, there are at least 80% of the bulk hold truth today. It is important to be aware of how things change. It’s interesting. As we looked at collecting the wisdom, stories, and experiences from the last five and a half years from The Muse and putting it into the book, a single point in time that people will sit down with on their couches, we had to be cognizant of that. My plan is to update the book regularly and we have the website to keep up to date. Anyone that thinks the rules of the workplace are changing isn’t swimming with the tide.

Scott Barlow: Yeah. Completely agree. I love that you are making those plans to update the book and have other methods to help people keep pace with it. Way to go. Virtual pat on the back because you are in New York and I’m on the opposite end of the country. Go check out the book. I’ve read through a bunch of it. I cherry picked but what I read was awesome. I highly recommend it. Where can people find it and find out more about you and the muse?

Kathryn Minshew: The book is “The New rules of Work”. It’s a modern book to navigate your career. You can hopefully find it everywhere, Amazon, Barnes and Noble, Project Indy, or your local book store. If they don’t have it ask for the manager and ask them to carry it. Hopefully they will. That is a great way for book sales so if you do it I will wave and high five you from New York. We are launching nationally and expect to be at every major retailer. We have a page on themuse.com/newrules that has excerpts, worksheets, and more information. For me I am on Twitter @kmin. Go to themuse.com and we would love to hear feedback, have you engage with the site, and leave a review for the book or email me. So far the feedback has been good so crossing my fingers and toes. Some of the best things we learn are from the people who read The Muse and the book and push us on our thinking. I’d love for people to engage and let me know what they think.

Scott Barlow: I really appreciate you taking the time and making the time and coming on the show sharing everything from test driving to figuring it out and everything in between. Thanks so much Kathryn.

Kathryn Minshew: Thank you. I’ve had a lot of fun and I’m glad we could do this.

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Add Value, Grow Your Career with Michael Bigelow

IT’S ONE OF THOSE THINGS THAT THE LIKABILITY AND CONNECTION CERTAINLY DO HELP. BUT IT’S ONE OF THOSE THINGS THAT I REALLY DO FEEL THAT IT’S BOTH WHO YOU KNOW AND HOW YOU’RE CONNECTED TO THEM, AS WELL AS WHAT YOU KNOW.

MICHAEL BIGELOW

Whether you’re looking to make a lateral job transition to a new industry or trying to achieve a major career overhaul, the process from the vision of your dream career to actually getting your foot in the door for an interview never seems like a straight shot.

Let’s start by breaking down the process to make it easier on yourself.

CHANGE YOUR MINDSET ABOUT INTERVIEWS – BOTH INFORMATIONAL AND JOB CANDIDATE, REAL-DEAL TYPE STUFF

Let’s distinguish what we refer to as an informational interview.

An informational interview is a conversation.

It’s a casual conversation with someone at an organization that you want to work for or it could be with someone who is in the position you’re looking to transition to.

The point of the informational interview is to find out more about this particular job that you’re interested in pursuing. Find out as much information as possible about the position, the person in the position, and their story and experience in that position (or their career in general).

Get some expert tips about the career you’re looking to transition to.

FIND THE EASY “ASK”

Do you have a friend that has gone through a career change? Maybe they know someone who knows someone that has successfully transitioned jobs or works in an industry you want to get into?

All it takes is asking your friend if they can connect you.

Here is a sample script in case you need one:
“Hey. I’ve been really excited about _____ of the ______ industry, I know that your friend works for _______. I’m hoping to ask them just a couple of questions about their experience about getting into the industry…would you be willing to introduce us?”

Then all you have to do it send off a quick email with 3 questions to start the conversation.

MAKE IS EASY FOR THEM TO SAY, “YES.”

When you score an interview, go into the meeting with the mindset that you’re not just a job seekerApproach the meeting without the expectation of coming out of it with a job offer.

It helps to understand that the people meeting with you are making an extra effort to talk to you. So, you want to make it count and make it worth it to them. You want to make the most of the mutual effort by not only doing your research, but having your questions ready to go.

Keeping the tone casual during an informational interview will allow the conversation to flow and provide for a better exchange. It will also allow you the ability to add value to your name and what you can offer by identifying some of the issues the organization struggles with and provide different solutions and perspectives to add to the organization’s existing toolbox.

HOW DO YOU ADD VALUE?

Even if you go into the interview without expectations of a job, people have to believe that you can do the job.  You want to demonstrate in a different capacity and interact with them your ability to do the job (…whatever that may be).

One thing that separates people is enthusiasm and that self-starter drive. Organizations are always looking for people that want to find solutions and fill the knowledge gap.

During your conversation, take note and apply your experiences to become part of the solution to their issues and go more in-depth to set yourself up on how you can add value to their organization, meet more people, and start more conversations.

DON’T FORGET TO FOLLOW-UP

Another way to give value is to send a follow-up. It doesn’t have to be business-related either.

You just want the other person to know that your conversation mattered and that it was meaningful to you. Show that the conversation had an impact on you and not in a way that you are expecting something in return.

It’s not always about business. We’re all people and taking the time to find out more about someone shows that you’re looking to expand your knowledge and that you’re serious about learning more.

Making sure that I was doing my best to feel like I had given something that really pushed me to think about, ‘Well if I can’t give something from a career or a job-focused perspective there are other things you can do for folks – even if it’s recommending a good YouTube video.’ It shows that you care in a way that’s natural and fun.

Michael Bigelow
“SOMETIMES YOU CAN STRETCH YOURSELF, AND SOMETIMES YOU NEED A TEAM OF PEOPLE TO KIND OF STRETCH YOU BEYOND YOUR BEST.”

If you’re ready for the next steps to take your career from good to great and need help gaining that outside perspective on your career and life to draw out the best and brightest spots of your unique combination of strengths, skills, and experience, we’ve got expert career coaches available to help create a road map to get you to your picture-perfect career situation.

Head on over to www.happentoyourcareer.com/coaching to work with one of our coaches and figure out your career blind spots and identify your BIG value-adds to guide you through your career change.

EPISODE LINKS AND RESOURCES

Guest: MICHAEL BIGELOW

Relevant Links
http://www.mikebigelow.net/htyc/

Relevant Resources

https://www.happentoyourcareer.com/172-time-energy-and-your-career-change/
https://www.happentoyourcareer.com/128-figuring-out-what-really-fits-with-eric-murphy/

Introduction 00:00
This is the Happen To Your Career podcast, Episode 174.

Mike Bigelow 00:05
When I moved to San Diego in the latter part of 2008, and this was a period where there were very few jobs in engineering, a lot of the folks I talk to using a sort of like normal channels, we're often saying, "hey, we'd love to have somebody like you on the team. Unfortunately, we just let three or four people just like you go, because there's not enough work to go around anymore."

Introduction 00:37
This is Happen To Your Career, we help you stop doing work that doesn't fit you, figure out what does and then make it happen. Whether you're looking to do your own thing, or find your dream job, you've come to the right place. I'm Scott Barlow.

Eric Murphy 01:00
Going asleep, waking up and just going through a brutal job and weekends being crazy short and Sunday being like, "ahh, I gotta go work again on Monday."

Scott Anthony Barlow 01:10
Eric was a burnt out engineer who wanted to move several states away to be able to find a career in a company that he absolutely loved.

Eric Murphy 01:17
It seemed like getting a really awesome job was really hard to do.

Scott Anthony Barlow 01:21
Listen for Eric story, later on in the episode to learn how he used coaching to be able to make a change to a job that he loved

Eric Murphy 01:27
I got the confidence to believe that making a transition like this can happen, which is huge.

Scott Anthony Barlow 01:38
Hey, this is Scott Anthony Barlow, and you are listening to Happen To Your Career. This is the show that helps you figure out what work fits you by exploring other stories. Now we get to bring on experts like Dr. Phil Carson, who teaches people to live a more balanced and healthier and have vibrant lives by managing stress, or people that have pretty amazing stories, like Lynn Marie Morskie, who helps people quit the things that aren't serving them to create a life that they love. And these are people, they're just like you. They've gone from where they are, to what they want to be doing. And they are people that are just like our next guest.

Mike Bigelow 02:12
My name is Mike Bigelow, and I'm an engineer who was living in Portland, Oregon, and was moving up to Seattle, Washington to support my wife's career change, and kind of move back home, my folks are still up here as well. As we're speaking now, I am sitting in my new apartment, having unpacked most of it in a gap week between when I left my old job, and when I'm starting my new job. So yeah, right here and now. It's pretty cool.

Scott Anthony Barlow 02:38
Having unpacked most of it, that in itself is a success.

Mike Bigelow 02:42
No kidding man. No kidding.

Scott Anthony Barlow 02:44
We got the pleasure of helping Mike make his career change. And in this episode, you're going to hear exactly what the differences are between local versus remote job searching, because we get so many questions about that. And Mike did a really fantastic job with this, not just in his most recent change, but over the life of his career. And also how to maximize your time in both situations, which is incredibly valuable. And then how career coaching can take you from being a good job candidate to a great candidate by offering the path that you want to grow along. And Mike did something really particularly well in identifying what his big value adds were from his past job experiences. And then he gives some really great examples in how you can apply them to nearly any industry. So take a listen for that a little bit later in the episode. And we also talk, we get pretty deep into how creating a conversational environment during informational interviews and what we call the test drive method, opens so many more doors than walking into the conversation, expecting a job offer or traditional job search methods. So first of all, let's go way back and talk about what led up to this change in the first place. Long before we met each other, and long before you went into this. You know, what did your career path really start ? Take me through some of that first.

Mike Bigelow 04:09
So one of the things that, I guess is maybe part of the origin story, if you will, I've been fortunate enough to work in several different areas over my career so far. And one of the odd things that has come out from that, one of the unique things I think, is the position I'm often in finding work in another city. So like, I'm always conducting remote job searches. And this presents a lot of different things in terms of challenges, and how you approach these sorts of things. When I first started my career, you know, right out of college, it was just, you know, email alarms and checking with them and have some conversations and it was good, but it was amateur, maybe a couple of times they got picked up by a headhunter or something like that, and that was refined. But what really brought me around to the idea that a systematic approach to making a career change, and the value of coaching was actually when I moved to San Diego in the latter part of 2008. And this was a period where there were very few jobs in engineering. A lot of the folks I talked to using sort of my normal channels, were often saying, "hey, we'd love to have somebody like you on the team. Unfortunately, we just let three or four people just like you go, because there's not enough work to go around anymore." So I realized early on in that career transition, that if I was going to be able to find a job, was rewarding in an area that I wanted to, and eventually just to be able to pay rent, like, I would need help, because I wasn't getting the results I needed. So I hired a coach back then. And it was one of the best I've ever made, because I was pushed to become the best version of myself and to present myself in ways that I hadn't thought about before. And at the end of that, it was a four month career campaign. And it really was a campaign like there was day in and day out activities, you know, constantly trying to meet new people, find ways to add value. At the end of that, though, I felt like, I'd been through the crucible, as it were. And I could pretty much figure this out no matter what came my way. And that proved pretty true for the next couple of transitions due to different moves and things like that.

Scott Anthony Barlow 06:21
Let me ask really, really quick, I'm super curious. When you went to San Diego, what took you there in the first place? And what were you doing just before that? Just to fill in some of the gaps for people.

Mike Bigelow 06:31
Great question. So I was moving to San Diego to support my wife, we were dating at the time, but she had a once in a lifetime opportunity for her educational career to get into astronomy. And this is a very competitive scientific field. And it's something she's been very passionate about. And it just lights her up like nothing else in the world. So I had the great fortune to have enough savings and the position and a little bit of experience in the job market to be able to join her in that move. I had been an engineer for about two years before and I was actually worked as a summer camp counselor, taking a bit of a break from that, when the recession really got into full swing. And that move down to San Diego was one of those ones where I just had some money in the bank and didn't know anybody. And I kind of had to start from ground zero in this time when folks like me were in great supply and low demand. And I ended up finding a position with a wonderful organization called the Center for Sustainable Energy. And they were administering rebates for new solar photovoltaic and solar water heating technologies, in my background in engineering sort of led myself to that. And I accepted that position, and started at the beginning of 2009. And that was one of the best things that happened to my career, honestly, was the coaching that allowed me to present myself in such a way to be appealing to these recruiters and our HR folks that were screening all the different applicants, as well as the support that my coach gave me in the first, really six months on the job, and made myself one of those folks that eventually became indispensable to the group I was working on. While I was there, I got promoted twice. And that was all because I set myself up for success at the very beginning. And obviously took a lot of work. And there was a lot of soul searching that went into that whole process. But at the end of it, looking back, I said, you know, it was really good that I ended up hiring Steve, who was my job coach at the time, and that I was fortunate enough to run into these folks at the Center for Sustainable Energy. They continue to do great work. And I still love running into those people from time to time, because there's just so many cool things that they're doing. And being able to be a part of that really helped launch the green engineering aspects of my career that have borne fruit time and again.

Scott Anthony Barlow 08:53
So I'm curious what happened next to them. And first of all, that's super cool, because I know that more about your progression, a little bit about your story, those green engineering aspects that you mentioned, too. I know those are going to come up again, too. So what happened from there? What prompted you to change again, because I know there was another change.

Mike Bigelow 09:15
Yeah, a lot of that change came from the advancement of my wife's career to get a PhD and so on and so forth. We ended up moving back to the Pacific Northwest, we wanted to either end up in Seattle or Portland. And so we moved to Portland for my position actually, which was wonderfully flexible in my wife's part. She did a great job negotiating her position with where she ended up now. And, you know, we had two years in Portland, but we knew that we would eventually have to move to Seattle for her position. And that's kind of what prompted me to start thinking about, okay, well, I know how to do this from a mechanic's perspective. I know how to get introduced to people. I know how to talk to folks. I've done this whole job search thing a few times. What's really going to make this different for me though, is I feel that this is an opportunity not just to change location, but also an opportunity to change position. This could be not just a lateral move from one city to another, but it could have the opportunity to be a promotion as well. I really do feel like I was moving my career and my experience to where I would be able to transition from leading projects, to potentially leading teams of technical people. And that is sort of been where I wanted to be for a long time. Because it's been one of the most rewarding things I've ever gotten to do back in college, I had a small team of folks I got to work with. And they said, "Sure, Mike, you can be team leader for this year long project" we were working on fuel cells. And I absolutely love that. And I knew that's where I wanted my career to take the path to grow along. And I knew that, you know, to get to a position of leadership, you kind of had to know all the things leading up to that. So that's kind of where I was when I was thinking about, okay, when I make this transition to Seattle, is this a possibility at this point? I think it is. How am I going to make that happen? So that was one of the reasons why I said, well, coaching did a lot for me back in 2008, I think it might be time to try coaching, again, to go from good to great, and to take some of those experiences that I've had, and really draw out the best and brightest parts of them. So that if there are opportunities to step into a more leadership based role, that I will not only present myself well enough for those, but I'll also be able to identify really where the big value ads are in those types of roles. And that can be something that I could do on my own. I know that those tasks are generally easier with an expert who is got a bit of distance between the problems that you're discussing, and sort of your emotional state as you're looking at those things. So that's...

Scott Anthony Barlow 11:52
It's hard to see your own blind spots.

Mike Bigelow 11:54
Exactly. And so that's what I felt would be a real asset to bring your coach along for this particular portion of my career transition.

Scott Anthony Barlow 12:03
Well, here's what I'm really curious about. And I think you did an absolutely fantastic job. I said that earlier on, as we're getting started here. But first of all curious about your first couple of transitions. And even if we go back before that I heard you say, you know, the remote job search and really kind of mastering the remote job search. What do you believe having been through that a few times, what do you believe are the major differences between the remote job searcher versus the local job search? What makes that more difficult in your mind?

Mike Bigelow 12:31
Well, the local job search has the advantage of being able to meet someone face to face for a coffee or for something like that, without a lot of disruption to your schedule. When you're using a lot of the techniques that you talked about Scott and many other career experts talk about, it sort of the fundamentals of being able to do a good informational interview or talk to somebody about how they got to where they are, because you want to maybe think about how you can consider to follow a similar path or add a similar amount of value to your own organization, being able to be in the same place is huge. So when you don't necessarily have that at a moment's notice, and you have to schedule those face to face interactions around some sort of travel or vacation, that gets a bit more challenging. The other part of it is that I really pushed myself to understand that a lot of the folks I'd be talking to, were making an extra effort to talk to me, because again, I wasn't going to be around, you know, for face to face conversation. You know, they were taking time out of their day to talk to me on the phone, or by Skype or what have you. And so I wanted to make sure that those 15 minutes or half an hour that we had together, were worth it for them. So it drove me to really over prepare my questions, how I thought about making time for their responses that even the way I took notes on this kind of thing, like it was just, I had a whole process I go through every time. And that I think really paid off because I felt that there was a great number of conversations I had, they just were absolutely fantastic. I learned a lot about the green industry, not just from a sort of Seattle centric perspective, but also from a larger sort of meta perspective. So those were absolutely wonderful insights to share with other professionals. And in the end, I really felt that it wasn't just about an exchange, right. I wasn't just a job seeker, who was hoping to make a transition. I felt like I could give something to them that was valuable, that was just, you know, I didn't want to feel as mercenary about it, honestly. I wanted this transition to Seattle to be a better exchange. I wanted folks to feel like that I took them seriously, I followed up on their advice, I had my own insights to share with them or ways that I could provide value to their organizations, even if we didn't end up working together and more often than not, I felt like I was able to provide that either through saying, "Hey, this is what I found out about this particular sort of meta trend that's going on" or, you know, "I feel that these tools are probably going to fit your requirements better than some of these other tools, I'd be happy to give a presentation about that." And sometimes it was just "Oh, hey, yeah, you're gonna be my neck of the woods, I'll buy a beer or whatever." And it was that kind of mentality and a mindset that I felt really allowed me to make the most of that distance, and to actually turn that obstacle into an asset where the amount of effort coming into it would allow folks to feel like that was worth their time. And it was certainly something that I wanted, it challenged me to bring out something beyond my current best, it stretched me.

Scott Anthony Barlow 15:48
So that is both awesome and interesting at the same time. Awesome, because I know what that takes, and that's not easy, necessarily. Interesting, because we get the, how do you do that question so frequently, so often? And then also, what does that look like? Because I think there's really a lot of confusion about this whole value thing. What the heck is value? And we've joked around with it quite a bit on the podcast. But I mean, really, you start to hear that word all the time. How do I add value? But I think you've already just mentioned a couple of semi tangible ways and what that looks like. But I'm curious if you can give an example. And since it's been semi fresh for you, tell us about one of those times where you were able to go in and you were able to add value in one way or another.

Mike Bigelow 16:38
Well, one of the things that I do, as part of the package of engineering in my sector of that is energy simulations for buildings. So you take a computer program, you worked on a virtual building inside of it, you put virtual people in it, they run all the virtual lights and add air conditioning, or they want heat or whatever. And at the end of a virtual year, in computer time, you figure out how much energy that building is likely to use. This is a difficult thing to do well in the building industry, but it's critical that it be done well for green buildings, and for some of the really high performance stuff that is pushing the industry to be more effective, more efficient, more cost conscious. There are firms that do mechanical engineering very, very well. And they come up with amazing designs that provide comfort. And it's one of those things, you know, how you talk about technology to be beautiful or invisible. This is both beautiful and invisible, like what these folks do, it is absolutely fantastic to see and understand kind of what they go for when they put these things together. So you can do that beautiful, invisible work and provide that end result of just comfort consistently throughout a building without any problems, without a lot of energy being used, without necessarily doing the energy modeling stuff that I specialize in. So there was a firm I got to talk to that was like, oh yeah, we might try to get into that. In the last couple times, we've done that, it's been difficult for one reason or another, you know, what would you do if you were to come in here and help us out? And I said, "well, regardless of what I would do, I would say, here are the tools that are out there, and what we need to do for you as a firm" because an individual solution, like if I come in, and I give you the solution, and I'm the guy that you have to run everything through, that's fine for a while, but hit by a bus and you've got deadlines like, you know, that's not going to work, we need to take a more systematic approach. And so here's how I would do that from a larger perspective, and you can do this without necessarily hiring me in terms of, you know, take this tool with this kind of post processing to get these sorts of results, once you have that under your belt, you might be able to add XYZ types of detailed solutions and things like that. I'm being vague on purpose, because there's a lot of detail that gets into that.

Scott Anthony Barlow 19:06
Saved the four hours of explanation to understand the explanation.

Mike Bigelow 19:10
Yeah, exactly.

Mike Bigelow 19:12
So in that process, we were able to collaborate on what a modeling system or solution for their firm might look like. And that was a way that I could use my experience to benefit somebody, even though I wasn't necessarily going to be hired by them, and then take care of like, yeah, this is really cool stuff. Yeah, we can potentially bring him in for a presentation. And it made the conversation much more two way, which I felt really awesome about. Other times, I was just able to offer, you know, findings from my research about what have you thought about talking about what we do as mechanical engineers in a different way in terms of saying, well, you can connect this energy thing that we're doing not just to this green building metric, but those two things actually combined for lower operational costs. And if you can prove it with these types of details and patterns back up, you might be able to talk to the project owner about, well, we're moving into a realm where you're going to have a higher profitability, lower cost to operate and product, which means that some of your core stats, and they've got their own jargon to talk about those things will be better in these ways. And so it was the ability to talk to folks about not just the technical work that we do, but also how we, as engineers, talk about it to non engineers, and how we can make sure that folks are giving us either the credit the team deserves in order for the amazing work that they do, or how to take what we're doing, and make sure that more people understand why it's important to their particular slice of the building industry, and those kind of conversations, again, even though I wasn't necessarily in the running for anything, or they weren't hiring at the time, they did a great conversation. And, you know, it's one of those things that we were able to develop sort of professional and mutual respect for each other's particular disciplines within mechanical engineering and those different spaces. And that I think, was the way that my research into not just how to do what we do for, you know, the actual tasks, but also the greater picture that those pieces move in, was able to really help other firms kind of think about, oh, yeah, well, you know, this is pretty cool stuff. And if we can talk about it in these different ways, being able to add those different perspectives and tools to their toolbox was another way I was able to provide value.

Eric Murphy 21:34
Grinding me to Pope.

Scott Anthony Barlow 21:36
That's Eric Murphy, we asked him what life was like before he made the change to his new career.

Eric Murphy 21:41
It sounds exaggerated, but that's how I felt sometimes.

Scott Anthony Barlow 21:43
Okay, it was pretty obvious that Eric wanted to make a change, right. But he didn't have a lot of time. And his job took a lot of energy out of him.

Eric Murphy 21:51
Weekends, being crazy short and Sunday being like, "ahh, I gotta go work again on Monday."

Scott Anthony Barlow 21:57
And that's exactly why Eric hired our team to help him make this change much, much easier.

Eric Murphy 22:01
Think one of the biggest benefits of having career coaching is when you're dealing with offers, etc., when you're in the thick of job searches, it's good to be able to email or text or call you to say, "hey, like this situation popped up. But how would you handle it?" That's also extremely useful. And a lot of your techniques, for example, writing handwritten thank you notes to everyone that you have conversations with, I wouldn't have thought of that. It made a massive impression. One guy and made me the offer, yeah, the handwritten thank you note in his hand, and it was like, this is very great. Thank you so much. That was really cool.

Scott Anthony Barlow 22:38
Congratulations to Eric and making the change to a career that he absolutely loves. If you want to make the change to a career that fits you and pays you more, find out how coaching can help you step by step, go over to happentoyourcareer.com and click on coaching to be able to apply or you can text MY COACH that's MY COACH to 44222. That's My Coach to 44222. Pause right now, and we'll send over your application, see you there.

Scott Anthony Barlow 23:08
So this is really, really interesting. And I just want to kind of recap what I heard out of that. So I heard you say that you were spending your own time of your own volition going and having conversations probably some of this time on your vacation, I would imagine or when you could be doing other stuff, and you were helping them without expectation necessarily that they're going to hire you.

Mike Bigelow 23:34
Yeah, that's the truest way I can really feel like I'm getting to somebody is to had as little expectation for reciprocity as possible. And honestly for me, personally, that made it a lot easier to kind of get away from the, how am I going to be efficient about this, and all those other sorts of things that can really put you in a different state, that isn't good, long term. It's very me focused rather than we focused or outcome would focused. So I did spend a lot of time preparing those sorts of things. I did spend time or lunch breaks, my weekends, and things like that, figuring out how I could bring value to folks through these different conversations, because I would assume that, you know, either they're having problems similar to what I'm facing in terms of getting non engineers to understand what we do, for instance, or, you know, with energy modeling and how to systematically take an approach that's going to work for them. I mean, they were using way different tools than I was, but at the same time, I'd use those tools, my other work. And so I was able to kind of talk about those kinds of things from a general strategic perspective. And that's what's important is that, you know, you're thinking about how you can serve the other person using the knowledge you have. And sometimes those assumptions were a bit off the mark, but at the same time, you know, being able to say, Well, here's X, Y, and Z, I like X, Y, and Z a little bit, really what I'm concerned about is ABC. Like, you know, we're already talking about the alphabet, so let's just focus on a different part of it or whatever. So there's that and then the other part of the Scott is that because I really wanted to make sure that I felt like I was giving to folks, I did my best to always follow a practice, which was new to me in this particular piece, which was to find something in our conversation that I could do for them as a follow up. And it doesn't have to be business related, there was one guy I was talking to. And he didn't allow me to buy the beers or anything like that when we were talking. And so there's no way I could give him any of those kinds of sort of monetary things or whatever. But he mentioned that, you know, "I'm kind of new to the area. And I really like hiking." And so I knew a couple of areas that were great hikes, I've seen other folks that are, you know, got young kids or families and things like that on these hikes, having a good time and said, hey, you know, at least I can follow up with that as a way to say more than just thanks for your time. So I said, "Hey, this great hike we talked about, here's the reasons that I think it was great, you know, I had some fun with my folks on one like this. And here are the links to the websites talking about the trail heads and things like that." you know, he said, thanks for that. And it was great, we got to kind of talk about hiking a little bit more after that by email. But at the same time, it was making sure that I was doing my best to feel like I had given something that really pushed me to think about, well, if I can't give something from a career, or a sort of job focus perspective, there are other things that you can do for folks, even if it's recommending, like a good YouTube video, like, it shows that you care. It's very natural, it's fun. I mean, folks do this with their friends all the time, hey, you gotta check this thing out. So I found some great SciShow videos that talked about, you know, avocados, and sent those to folks, of course, it wasn't just randomly, like we had actually talked about, you know, all my kids are interested in science, and they're, you know, nine and 10. And they, you know, are all about blah, blah, blah, I was like, "Hey, well, have you seen this" or, you know, other folks like that, again, had interest that we had talked about even tangentially that I could send a follow up on as a way to, again, give value. And I know that we talked about giving value all the time, I want folks to think about how that that is a shorthand for really, either being a friend or being a person who cares about what was talked about, and following up with something that let's the other person you were talking to know that your conversation mattered to you, you know, the conversation that you had was meaningful and impactful. And I remembered some details from it, and I'm acting on those details later. And that made this a very interesting career transition for me, Scott, because it wasn't just about finding a job, it was about finding my place in a community, and being able to show folks that I wasn't there, just to find something I was literally, oh I'm sorry, legitimately, I should say, interested in our conversation beyond the Mike needs a place to land in Seattle eventually. And that's really paid off, well, because I've been able to keep folks who I've gotten to know, even if I'm not working with them, like we've been signed up to go, you know, grab lunch sometime in the next couple of weeks, or, you know, we're gonna get together for something fun later on, or grab some beers or whatever. And that's really kind of neat, because I'm getting to know these folks, not just professionals, but as people who are interested in hiking, or grilling, or video games, or whatever else they're interested in, like, there's so much more to what we do than our labor and our work. And those are always very important parts of our day, and our week and all that, but at the same time, that's only one dimension of people and to be able to recognize that, you know, there are ways that you can help people either in their career or what problems they're working on, in these conversations but it can be something more fun and personal, like, you know, "hey, we talked about your kids being into this branch of science, or here's this one video I found, let me know what you think." And you know, it's those kinds of things that make this less about finding work and finding a thing to do for money and more about creating a career that you like, finding people that you can connect with, and being able to feel like you've given at least as much as you've received in these sorts of things.

Scott Anthony Barlow 29:07
Yeah, well, here's what's really interesting about what you just said, and also how you've gone about this is, so many of us are interested in having those things in our community of people that we actually get along with and like and, you know, in some cases, a boss that supports us and that we connect with and you know, have a good fit with the company and all of these other pieces, and yet we go looking for a job. So when we make a job change, we go and look for a job and then we find a job, miracly, because we go find what it is that we aim ourself towards in nearly every case. So then we're surprised somehow when it's just a job or it doesn't have all of these other things versus I would advocate that what you did is wholeheartedly different, because you went looking for some of the things that were most important to you and acted as those things were actually important and started with those things, rather than going in searching for a job. And ironically, you got way better, not ironically, not coincidentally, at all, you got way better results, than nearly everybody else. I forget the stats, but it's really, really low percentage of people that will get multiple job offers at the same time. Let alone, I do know the stats for people that will actually end up in a role that they actually enjoy in our content when satisfied with and experience continuous levels of satisfaction that is very low, and depending on which study you look at, it's someplace between about 30% on the high end, all the way down to about 12% on the low end.

Mike Bigelow 30:45
Wow, that's a very surprising statistics right there.

Scott Anthony Barlow 30:48
It's horrible.

Mike Bigelow 30:49
Yeah, that's pretty rough. At the same time, I feel though, that I personally have had very good supervisors and bosses throughout my career. And I honestly wouldn't be where I am today without a lot of their guidance and their tutelage, if you will. And I'm really excited for the folks that I'm joining as well, because though, like you talked about finding kind of a fit in a community, I really do feel like I'm joining a great community of folks that are doing good work in ways that I think are going to make an impact that we're going to be satisfied with at the end of the day. And that's been a wonderful thing. The flip side of that is that you've pointed out that, you know, you have to go about maybe doing the search and maybe a broader with a bit of a broader focus, it did take a little bit more effort. And in terms of like, you know, it was a little scary to be kind of vulnerable and saying like, I kind of like this video, and it's sort of, it's a scientific show, it's kind of fun and goofy, you know, to a business contact, you know, like we did projects that were worth multi millions of dollars. And you know, I'm just okay, "your kids might like this, what do you think?" That was sort of a scary and vulnerable point for me, but and I'm just thinking back across all the different conversations I've had over the last 11 years or so my career, I can think of maybe two or three that were negative, and the rest of all have been positive. And so it's one of those things that it is scary. And it does make you feel a little vulnerable to go outside of that standard script that we think that folks want to kind of talk about. But there's a lot out there. And even if it's just somebody saying, "Hey, that was cool, thanks." And nothing else ever comes of that conversation. It was important for me to feel like that I wasn't talking just about the work or the job, or the recommendation or the advice or the whatever. And that for me, made the process something that I could devote more energy too, because it gave more energy back to me. Does that make sense?

Scott Anthony Barlow 32:41
Yeah, it completely makes sense. And if we want to, well, you've got an engineering background and engineering discipline and everything like that. So if we want to take this fairly fuzzy and somewhat scary and semi emotional thing that is putting yourself out there to some degree, and turn it into something that is much more logical, if we just look at the logical side and say, "well, hey, we want to hire other people, or we want to work with other people that we like" right? Which means we want to work with other people that we get along with, which means that we want to work with other people that we share something in common or have some way where we are like them. And that's where those types of connections and beginnings of relationships. And that's where it becomes really logical when you trace those things all the way through. It's like, oh, yeah, of course, that's the person who ends up getting hired. Why wouldn't it be? We don't want to hire the person that's robotic. They look good on paper, and they come in, and they may say all the right things per se that, you ask hiring managers about this, that don't necessarily have lots and lots of interview experience. And they'll say things like, "well, it just feels like there's something off about this one." When I sat in the roundtable afterwards, and we discussed candidates, and that's what comes out of hiring managers mouth. Well, you know, they've got all the experience, and it seems like everything's good here. But I really like Johnny, you know, I think Johnny could do the job, or in this case, you know, I think Mike could probably do this with us, I just really liked that guy.

Mike Bigelow 34:13
Well, you're right. And it's one of those things that the likability and the connection certainly do help. But it's one of those things that I really do feel it's both who you know, and how you're connected to them, as well as what you know, it's got to be a combination of those two things, at least in the field that I'm in, because, and I say that mostly because of limited of my experience. I don't know how other fields kind of break down in terms of that. I do know that those good connections would have gotten me opportunities, they did give me opportunities to talk to folks that I might not have had a chance to talk to otherwise, at the same time, the position I did end up accepting was excited about the whole of my experience and what I could bring to the table in terms of what you can do and I have a feeling that most folks who are listening to your podcast and they're reading your blog, then they know how to do the thing. And it's just getting everyone else to kind of understand that there's, you know, a really cool person there. And that's something that takes practice, but is so rewarding at the end. And keep in mind, we're talking in sort of the afterglow of success here, Scott, like, I want to remind folks that I am where I am, because of a lot of hard work. If we go back to our earlier conversation, like the first time I hired a career coach back in 2008, that was four months of me doing job search stuff, eight hours a day, every day, I took weekends off, but like, that was my full time job was finding some work in 2008. So my point is that there's maybe a tendency for folks because I know I've fallen into this same thing where it's just like, you hear somebody who's done all this, wow, like, that's so great. Like, oh, man, I don't know if I could do that. It's just everyone is got time, and the ability to do good work, and hard work. And I know that the choices that I've made to put in that effort, and the opportunities I've had to put in that effort, which were mostly in my control, but sometimes they weren't, sometimes I simply just got lucky that I talked to somebody at the right time, or had a conversation go one way rather than another. And those things are important to kind of keep in mind as we're talking about all this. It's not just like, oh, this guy like did all these cool things, and now has extra free time to invest a little bit of extra time and talking to people, you know, like the flip side of this is that during this last transition up to Seattle, Scott, when I was working with Lisa, not only was that help just what I needed at the time to kind of take myself from where I know I could go to where I ended up getting. But I gave myself permission to make time in other areas of my day, that time that it took me to find a new position in Seattle, like I said, I'm normally responsible for dinner, if I'm just eating by myself, it's okay for me to get takeout, and it's okay for me to eat something that's frozen. Like I just carte blanche gave myself permission to do that, like I didn't say, you don't have to exercise anymore, I was still up, you know, up on my exercise routine, I still tracked what I was eating and things like that. But I just gave myself permission not to necessarily have to prepare my own food. And that saved me a bit of time or a little mental bandwidth, in order to devote more time to this kind of thing. You know, I also knew that I was going to be most productive on this kind of a thing, about seven o'clock to about nine o'clock at night. So I didn't force myself to do anything. When I got home from my day job, I would give myself permission to watch, you know, a half an hour of Netflix while I ate dinner, or whatever. And then I wouldn't watch any more Netflix, I knew what kind of worked for me, and I gave myself permission to have a little bit of free time in some areas. But I also kept, you know, making sure that essentially four days a week, I was working at least an hour a day on this devote my Sunday afternoons typically it's kind of planning my week and initial emails prep and written or researched. And I devoted time on my calendar that I blocked it out, because that's what worked for me. Other folks have used, you know, checklists or habit apps or whatever, and those you know, whatever works for you just do it, just find that system that allows you to kind of track this progress, know that it's going to take a bit of effort. And there are going to be times when you've just feel kind of stupid, or at least I felt pretty tough, for whatever reason, like there's something didn't go the way I wanted or somebody cancelled on me at the last minute or they you know, for whatever reason, like we weren't able to make a clone call or something, I kind of feel bad, like I didn't give them enough heads up, I didn't send a reminder in time or they had something come up. And you know, maybe they're just blowing me off or whatever, like kind of keeping focused on sort of the next step like, well, if they're blowing me off on this next one, and it's not going to be a big deal, I've got four other people I can talk to, and I'll focus on setting up, you know, another conversation with the person I didn't connect with today. And then I'm going to let that be, that's going to be when it's going to be and we'll move on to talking to these other folks and kind of sending those emails and doing that research about what they may be struggling with or talking to their companies about. So I don't know, I felt like I just kind of went on a bit of a deep dive because that kind of makes sense in the context of what we're talking about.

Scott Anthony Barlow 39:09
Yeah, let me pull out a couple of things that I think are really, really powerful out of that. First of all, let me reach way back and say that, the method that we were talking about where you're giving value first, and you're looking for those opportunities to give value and even have shifted the mindset and you're having conversations without the intent to immediately get a job, give me a job now, which is by the way, like asking for marriage on the first date. So just don't do that ever again ever. But what you did we often call that the 'test drive method' here and something else that I don't think we said that I think was very, very valuable and you kind of alluded to it was the fact that hey, look, people have to believe that you can do the job. I think one of the other values that people often miss when you're going in and getting to have these types of conversations in the level that you did and build relationships which in some cases, evolve into continuous conversations, then you get the ability to demonstrate in front of them in a totally different capacity than you would if you're coming through a, I don't know, an application or something else, you get the ability to demonstrate in front of them and interact with them while you're demonstrating your ability to do the thing. And that's completely different, like other people don't get that opportunity, if you go about it the traditional way. Or if you're asking for marriage on the first day, as we said.

Mike Bigelow 40:32
Agreed. Part of my experience that's maybe related to but slightly different than what you talked about there is I feel that in an interview situation, you have a very limited amount of time to show people what you really bring to the table. And you can be very well prepared for this with great stories, anecdotes about how your experience matches to their needs, and you can solve what they're talking about. But at the same time, if you've had a chance to talk to somebody who might be your future coworker, or your future supervisor or boss in a more informal setting, and you've had time to, in a more conversational way, you show them that you've got a lot of these stories, and you're interesting and interested and all that. But you can also kind of figure out sort of what they're really top concerns are. And if you're fortunate enough to be introduced to some other folks in the organization and get to see a broader perspective, you're absolutely right, Scott, in saying that it's a very different game to have those informal conversations with people beforehand. Because as you're going through the formal process, you have much greater amounts of insight into the particular issues that that team is facing, what experience you have can match that and how they want to kind of hear about those pieces. It doesn't have to be something like, you know, I do realize that I'm coming at this with pretty solid set of projects under my belt and jobs and things like that. If you don't have that level of experience, still being able to tell those stories, even if it's something that started maybe sounds silly in your head, like, well, I did this one thing in college or I was a camp counselor that did you know, this thing, if you can kind of connect what you did, even in those situations that don't seem all that high stakes, and they don't have seven figures of project or budget, writing on it, just being able to talk about those things really allows folks to kind of see that you're thinking through the sorts of questions that they're asking, and that you're able to, again, paint that picture of yourself, had those other experiences and that better conversation. And that can put somebody who is more prepared and more engaged ahead of somebody with more experience, who might look better on paper. So I feel that your points are very well taken here, Scott, in terms of these informal conversations do allow you to play the game a lot differently.

Scott Anthony Barlow 42:55
Oh, yeah, absolutely. And the other thing I don't want to get lost that you had mentioned as well, and I think we talked about this on a few different episodes. For example, most recent one, I believe, was our episode on making sure that you have the energy and the ability to make the change. But also, I would put this in the category of what I heard you doing was making this much easier on yourself in a variety of different ways, some of the mental energy it might take by allowing yourself to pre make the decision of, look, on Wednesday nights, I'm going to eat this thing in this way. And it's just not a big deal. And, you know, we're done with it. And I don't have to think about it anymore. And then the other side of it too, and I think we talked about this in Episode 128 with Eric, who was another coaching client, past coaching client, actually, ironically, also an engineer. And we worked with him quite a bit on, hey, how do we make this a much easier situation? How do we... have you take action on some of this stuff where you're at your best? And just naturally, you know, at some of your best energy levels, how do we leverage the time that is already in your day where it's going to be easier to be able to make some of these things happen versus more difficult? How do we set the chessboard up, so it's very easy to get the checkmate versus having to bring the Queen from all the way here to all the way over there. Why not just make it easier? And I think you did a particularly good job of that. So kudos to you first of all.

Mike Bigelow 44:23
Thank you.

Scott Anthony Barlow 44:24
Yeah. And consequently, it sounds like, you know, this transition was much easier in some respects, than the 2008 transition, just in terms of sheer time almost, that it takes. If I'm doing the math, right.

Mike Bigelow 44:36
Yeah, I mean, this one was about two months versus four months back in 2008. Obviously, slightly different circumstances. But at the same time, your point is well taken that, at that point in my career, I was very focused on just the fundamentals of how to talk to people better in a professional capacity. And that worked out fairly well. At the same time, you know, I got myself to the point through that, that I was like, you know, I did okay, but there are other things that I could do better. And that's what I really felt like I was able to grow into this time is doing that second half of it better. And of course, you know, that's part of the reason why I feel that coaching is a very valuable thing is that, you know, if you just take a look at my own career, my own success, it's been because I've had people able to kind of show me better ways to do things, or to challenge me to do more than I have been. Because sometimes you can stretch yourself, and sometimes, you need a team of people to kind of stretch you beyond your best. And that's something that I think the biggest value for me from coaching is that you have somebody in your corner, who is looking out for your best interest. And if they're doing their job, as well, as Lisa did hers, they're pushing you to be the best version of yourself, and to stretch and grow yourself consistently towards that best self.

Scott Anthony Barlow 45:52
Well, I'm certainly a huge fan of Lisa. And she kept me in the loop for your entire journey. So that was fun because I got to, for every person that we work with, I sort of get to live vicariously through them. And as we bring more and more coaches onto the team, then I get more and more of that. So that makes it a lot of fun for me. But as I mentioned already, I think you did particularly nice job just because you were looking, well, I mean, this wasn't your first time around. So I think we got to see advances even and I think that was one of the reasons I was interested in having you come on and talk about this. So one other question that I would ask you, Mike, before we go is, you know, if somebody is getting started, and somebody is on the other end of this, maybe we're back where you were in 2008, or they haven't made several of these transitions in this particular type of way, what would you advise them to do to get started using this type of what we call the test drive method, which is a variation of informational interviews or informational interviews themselves, or any other method that really requires being able to get out there and begin building relationships with people?

Mike Bigelow 47:02
That's a good and tough question, Scott, I would say, and this is something I've actually talked to some folks that have come to me in the last couple of weeks, say, "Hey, I see that you're doing this job transition thing, how do I do that?" I would say start making this as easy on yourself as you can. Because this finding a different job or starting a career or changing a career, those are all very difficult, energy intensive things that take a lot of your time, your emotional energy and mental bandwidth. It's a big undertaking. So start off by making it easy. Look at your friends who maybe are doing things, or know folks that you could potentially talk to and find at easy ask, you know, if one of, for instance, has a friend that maybe you met at a party or know of through, you know, kind of a friend of a friend thing, and they work in video games, and you were thinking, you know, "maybe I could do this video game thing, because I like programming, or I'm very good at sort of the drawing aspects of coming up with these assets. I love computer animation" or whatever it is that you might think about those kind of things. But you need, I mean, it's a hard industry to get into, ask your friends saying, "hey, I've been really excited about XYZ parts of the video game industry. I know that your friend, you know, works for whatever company that's doing cool stuff. I'm hoping to ask them just to kind of a couple of questions about their experience in getting into the industry. Do you think would you be willing to introduce us? I'll just send him an email with three questions, and if they're too busy, it's totally fine." Something along those lines is the way to get started. The reason I say that is because A; your friend wants to help you out, they know that you're excited about video games, in this case, and their friend maybe works for a company that could help you guys figure that out. You've given a way to start the conversation saying that you're excited about this portion of it, or you've done something like this. And you want to know more about how their story looked, again, you're focused on not what you want, but what their story is, which is, again, easier to talk about if you're a person who is in the industry and somebody who's like a beginner, or trying to make the transition is coming to you. It's easier to kind of talk about your story than it is maybe give specific advice because it also got to think about it from their perspective, like be in a position where they have more knowledge than you, where they have more authority or experience or what have you. But at the same time, it's almost like getting put on the spot be like, what do I do to get in? That's a hard question to answer because there are a lot of complexities and experts or people with you know, a lot of experience can understand that that's a tough thing to nail down well. So make it easy on them to say 'yes' by you know, saying well, "I just want to know a bit about their story about how they got in, maybe ask them a couple of questions about the industry." Because then it's not about, you know, what do I do, it's about what's out there with the problems that are being faced. So you're taking a lot of load off the person you eventually want to talk to and your friend who's gonna be making these introductions. So at the end of all this, you've made it very easy for people to say yes, because they're not committing too much in terms of the length of conversation or the gravity of the conversation. There's not a lot of expectations in terms of like, well, you know, I'll need to find a way to get this person in interview or anything like that, there's none of that, you're just trying to find out what their story is, what issues or challenges are in the industry that they're facing right now. And from there, you'll be able to get a lot more information about how your background could potentially fit those sorts of things, or to, you know, attack the problem in a different way. And this can give you great insights, not only for eventually maybe making that transition, but they're going to allow you to have more in depth conversations as things progress. A great example is that, you know, somebody I know, went ahead and did this, and when they had that conversation, they're prepared a little bit to ask good questions. It wasn't that sort of, oh, I need to find some buddies, you know, interview or next step or give them advice that's going to change their life or anything. They were just talking about, "how did you get in here? What was cool about it? What do you like? And what are some of the problems you're facing?" That led to a couple of introductions to other folks. And now, those introductions are going to be the ones where you have a lot more information from your first couple of conversations. Now, you can have much higher level conversations with those next groups of people. I kind of got a little detailed there. I apologize, Scott, you were asking a more general, right?

Scott Anthony Barlow 51:35
No, that's perfect. I think that helps people understand, one, how to get started, and two, what this can take. The less we're looking at this as a, I go and I talked to the person and then I get the job. The more that we're looking at this as a long term game, how do I actually build relationships? Or how do I set myself up to be able to add value or set myself up to be able to meet more people or set myself up to any number of other things, then I think that ends up getting, over the long term, better results, even though it feels to many people counter intuitively, like a longer way around.

Mike Bigelow 52:14
It's true, it can feel like a longer way around. But at the end of the day, we want, at least for me, one of the things that I felt was really motivating. And what I've loved seeing in folks who are just starting out who also are very, it's obvious, they want to make, you know, a career change to like the green engineering field or whatever. Like the fact that they've come and they've brought enthusiasm, they've brought decent questions that they've either researched, and at least they've talked to other folks about, those kind of conversations are just amazing to have as somebody who's in an industry that folks have wanted to get into. So I felt great about those conversations, because I've been able to, you know, kind of feel pretty cool about knowing stuff. And be know that the person I'm talking to is acting on that information. It's not just we didn't just have a good conversation. And you know, that was it, like they're taking it seriously. And they're acting on finding solutions or they're part of the solution to some of these issues that we talked about. So I guess, you know, kind of sum up, folks who are at the start, or might not necessarily have a lot of connections, or they don't feel like they can bring a lot to the table, realize that being a person who will listen and act is value in itself. And when you're serious about trying to take these difficult questions that you might wrestle with, in terms of like technical problems and things like that, because there was actually a time that I was talking to one group of engineers, and they threw a modeling problem at me that I had no idea, like, I had not seen this in my research. And I had just, I had dropped the ball and trying to figure this thing out. You know, but I was honest with them, I said, "You know what, I don't have a good solution for you on that one. But here's kind of what about that. Here's how I might approach and okay, that's fine." And we kind of let it go. And we talked about other things. Well, I went back and found out exactly how to do what they had asked me to do, not just the general solution that I kind of threw my hands and was like, maybe this and I was like, "Okay, here's how I was right. Here's how the general solution that I outlined can fail. So here's what you have to do to correct it." And I sent him a one page synopsis of the full solution afterwards. And that really changed the tone of the conversation. There's like, okay, Mike is serious, and he's taking this whole conversation to the next level. So the point of that is that if you don't know, that's okay. The problem isn't you don't know. The problem is if you find out that you don't know about something that's important to the industry that you want to get into, and you don't try and follow up with that, that's the problem. You got to use that sort of beginner's state to your advantage by being able to be sort out there and saying, "Look, this is kind of what I found so far" you know, and people might be able to give you a little bit more insight into what you're missing out. But to have somebody kind of fill in that gap after you talk to them and come back to you, like I said, I've been on both sides of that. And that has been just one of the really cool things about talking about either engineering or any sort of position is finding other folks that are excited enough to kind of try and figure out how these things are going to look differently or to find those solutions to actively fill in that knowledge gap. And even if you're at a more beginner level, or earlier on in your career, like that's what separates folks who are there and are going to grow from folks who are there and are maybe going to eventually get promoted, like enthusiasm. And this sort of self starter drive counts for a lot. And it doesn't have to be something like, you know, you do it the day of I mean, I was a bit extreme in that. It's something that if you know, you get back to folks in a week or two, with a good solution like that, people remember that. So I would say if you're in an early stage, or you feel like a beginner and you don't have a lot to contribute, being a person who's willing to ask questions, you've researched a bit, and to follow up on the answers is going to be the way to really, hey, learn a lot and be set yourself apart, as somebody who's taking what these folks say seriously.

Scott Anthony Barlow 56:23
Well, I really appreciate that. And I really appreciate you taking the time to come on, share your story, share some of your successes, especially the recent successes, and then also share some of the things and that maybe haven't gone as well, either or have, I guess, share the what it takes behind the scenes. That's, I think what I'm looking for. And I think all of that is really, really valuable to HTYCers that are listening right now, and are in this place where they're making a transition or about to make a transition or deciding to make a change in one way or another. So I very, very much appreciate that. And I know that we were chatting before, and you've committed to detailing some of this out on paper, on purpose, if I understood correctly, you're gonna do that and post it up on your website. So people can go over and be able to, I guess, see it in writing, if you will.

Mike Bigelow 57:18
I definitely want to make sure that I take this opportunity to kind of give back to your community here, Scott. So I'm thrilled to be able to put that together for, not only my friends, but for the greater HTYC community. So that website, it is a mikebigelow.net/htyc.

Scott Anthony Barlow 57:39
Cool. Well, I think people can remember that, we'll have that link in there as well. And you can find Mike's story and more about him and how he went through this process. And certainly coaching from HTYC and our team as well, on the show notes page, just go over to happentoyourcareer.com. And certainly you can find more about happentoyourcareer.com/coaching. So Mike, thank you so very, very much. This has been a pleasure. I'm so glad that we got to do this.

Mike Bigelow 58:07
Thank you, Scott, this has been wonderful.

Scott Anthony Barlow 58:17
Hey, if you're ready to take that next step in your career transition, but like Michael, you need a new perspective on your value ends, then I would absolutely urge you to apply for coaching, we'll set you up with one of our career coaches that can help you highlight your experiences and frame them in a way that, not only sets you apart from the competition, but leads you down a path to work that you've actually want to be doing. Here's a really, really easy way to do that you can go to Happen to Your Career and click on coaching at the top of the page. Or you can go ahead and pause this and text MY COACH to 44222. And we'll send you the applications that you can get started on it right away to find out if coaching is right for you and can help you make this transition. All right. We'll see over there.

Scott Anthony Barlow 59:05
Hey, thank you so much for taking the time and listening to the episode. I absolutely love this because Michael's so close to having just done this. And many of the people that we've had on the show have amazing stories, absolutely amazing stories, but I want to be able to share even more people. So we're going to do that, we're going to do exactly that. We're gonna bring more of the people that have already made this transition, and particularly some of the people that we've helped very, very recently do that sort of thing, because that helps you get even closer to understanding how it's possible for you and exactly what they did to be able to make it happen. So Michael did a fantastic job. And I'm really proud of him, quite frankly. But well and, no but, and I want to see you be able to do that too. So much more coming your way. And thank you so much for taking the time and making the time and listening to the show. Here's what's coming up next week on Happen to Your Career, we got plenty more where this came from.

1:00:04
I decided pretty quickly that my career was going to be in the Foreign Service for International relations of some sort. So as I grew up, I was absolutely in love with the idea of being an ambassador, a foreign service officer, an international woman of mystery as it were. But after studying political science, learning French and some Turkish language, traveling extensively, I had the chance to work in an embassy in Nicosia, Cyprus, the US Embassy there, and the regional security team. You know, it was an incredible experience, but it was not what I expected.

Scott Anthony Barlow 1:00:40
Hey, all that and more next week on Happen to Your Career. Thanks so much. I appreciate all the people that have been leaving reviews lately, that helps so many more people find the show. And it's one of the best gifts that you can give to, not just me, but the entire team, because that means that other people find the show. So if you've enjoyed this at all, I would absolutely appreciate and urge you to take a few seconds and give us an honest review. Here's one from Frank cast. This is a five star review that said, "I have learned a lot by listening to Scott and his guests on the podcast, I find it to be highly motivating and filled with practical tools and application." Thanks so much, Frank, really appreciate it. And if there's anything that you need, don't hesitate to go over to the website happentoyourcareer.com reach out to us. This is what we do and what we love to do. So we're going to continue to make good stuff for you and help you make it happen. Hey, we'll see you next time. Adios. I'm out.

Mike Bigelow 1:01:52
This is super exciting for me too, Scott. I've really appreciated the work that your team, particularly Lisa has put into helping me make this career transition. For those who are listening, my name is Mike Bigelow, and I'm an engineer who was living in Portland, Oregon, and was moving up to Seattle, Washington to support my wife's career change and kind of move back home. My folks are still up here as well. And what was wonderful about working with the Happen to Your Career team was that I was able to learn so much about how to go from good to great in that career transition.

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How to Know if You Should Start a Business with Mark Sieverkropp

YOU THINK IT’S HARD IN A JOB NOT HAVING THE FLEXIBILITY OF SCHEDULE OR NOT BEING ABLE TO DO SOME THINGS, BUT IT’S WAY HARDER WHEN YOU DON’T HAVE A SCHEDULE.

MARK SIEVERKROPP

Have you ever thought, “should I start a business?”Some think it will solve all of their career problems. But will it really?We hear a lot of stories about people quitting their day jobs and starting their multi-million dollar business.But, what we don’t see is all of the hard work and effort and LONG hours that they put into cultivating their ideas and the sleepless nights of putting those ideas into action.Starting your own business isn’t something that you’ll just do tomorrow just because you feel like it, so we’ve put together a list of questions that you should be able to answer before you hit the ground running with your new business idea.When you answer these questions, don’t cheat yourself. Be clear of why you are starting a business and not why you are running from your day job.

QUESTION 1: WHEN THINKING “SHOULD I START A BUSINESS”, WHAT DO YOU REALLY WANT OUT OF STARTING A BUSINESS? 

Do you know what is most important to you about starting a business? If you can’t answer that question, here’s what you can do right now, before anything else.

Brain Dump
Make a list of what is most important to you about starting your own business. This should be everything you think you’re going to get when you start your business.

Write this list down digitally or in a notebook, but keep this list close. Continue to add to it from things you hear, or read, or experience. For example, when you’re at work and you realize what the tasks are that you really don’t want to do, or the things that you wish you were able to do at your job.

PRIORITIZE Your List
You can make this part of the process less overwhelming for yourself by using the “Optical approach.” The one-two comparison you run into when purchasing a new set of eyeglasses.

In the sea of choices that you have for a new set of eyeglass frames, choosing one has been a little less overwhelming as the process is broken down for you by simply comparing one set of glasses to another. Take that same approach and apply it to your list of why owning your own business is important.

Just compare one reason to another, one or two, and put the most important things at the top of the list.

If it’s things like flexibility or freedom to decide how the work gets done, or if you want to be able to use more of your creativity at your job, you may not actually need a business to do that.

You probably just haven’t experienced a job that allows that to happen. Check out our episode on how to do your career differently as we talk about another list of things you need to have in your career to be happy.

You don’t need to own your own business to find that happiness. Listen to our episode with Dustin Hartzler as he created his own hybrid situation at work to fit his change of lifestyle.

QUESTION 2: ARE YOU MORE INTERESTED IN ACTUALLY STARTING A BUSINESS OR SIMPLY RUNNING OR OPERATING A BUSINESS?  

Let’s distinguish what is required from you to start your own business or operate a business.

When you start your own business, it can definitely be fun…if you’re up for the constant challenge of dealing with change. You must be able to rapidly adapt to the changes you encounter when starting your own business, because it will happen.

You’ll learn early on that as a new business owner, you can’t keep doing something that doesn’t work or help you get your business off the ground or improve its growth.

Another type of mindset you need to have is being able to understand and embrace failure. If you are able to accept failure as a process of learning, owning your own business could be a path you should follow.

On the other hand, if you have a hard time with failure or adapting to change, another avenue to look into is franchising or buying a business that already has their own business processes.

If that sounds like something that is more your style, listen to HTYC 166 Building on Business with Ace Chapman. Ace has all the tips you need on how to build your business by buying a business.

QUESTION 3: DO YOU HAVE ANYTHING RIGHT NOW THAT IS ACTUALLY STOPPING YOU FROM STARTING A BUSINESS?  

A LOT goes into starting your own business.

From the financial aspect to time and energy, and to everything that is tied into your life.

Do you have an incredibly demanding job? Will you be able to rearrange your situation to allow you to make the time to put the effort into building your business?

What about your family life?

Do you need to have a conversation with anyone that this decision will affect? A spouse, significant other, business partner, or anyone that has a vested interest in this decision?

If that is the case, find out what their deal breakers are or their aversion to risk because starting your own business comes with risks, that’s for sure.

Make it a point to identify and address these issues upfront because you won’t have the time or the energy to deal with that stuff when the ball gets rolling.

QUESTION 4: ARE YOU WILLING TO GO THE LONG HAUL? ARE YOU WILLING TO COMMIT TO THIS FOR THE LONG RUN?

The start-up process isn’t easy.

In time, it will look different. It will evolve.

Can you adjust? Will you be able to pivot with the constant change?

If now, know now that once you get a taste of starting your own business, it will be hard to go back to a job and work for someone else.

You might even be twice as miserable if you have to go back to a job. So, you want to make sure this is what you want to do.

Realize that it is a long-term decision that you’re making.

Takes A LOT of investment and effort…time, energy, and money.

Are you willing to work at this new business on the fun days and more importantly on the days that aren’t as fun?

If not, you might just want to find a better job.

In the end, if you’re thinking “should i start a business?”, make some time in your day to sit down and answer these questions.

When you get to the root of the reasons of why you want to venture down this path and you’re clear on some of the real issues and roadblocks that you may have to face, you’ll be ready to embrace the journey into entrepreneurship and pivot when things need to change to grow your new business.

EPISODE LINKS AND RESOURCES

Guest: MARK SIEVERKROPP

Relevant Links

www.backyardsoccercoach.com

Relevant Resources
https://www.happentoyourcareer.com/mark-sieverkropp-project-success/
https://www.happentoyourcareer.com/023-tackle-dreams-step-step-mark-sieverkropp-skropp2/
https://www.happentoyourcareer.com/057-networking-with-purpose-mark-sieverkropp-skropp2/
https://www.happentoyourcareer.com/145-making-it-happen-three-years-counting-a-special-anniversary-q-a-with-scott-mark/

Scott Barlow: Welcome back to Happen to Your Career. I have with me a very special guest. So special in fact that we absolutely had to record this early in the morning. Mostly because our schedules don’t align except early, and it’s because it’s what we used to do.

Welcome back Mark Sieverkropp reappearing on Happen to Your Career. It has been awhile since we’ve done this.

Mark Sieverkropp: You just can’t get rid of me. We should have done it while we were having lunch today that would have been fun.

Scott Barlow: It probably would have been better. Why didn’t we do that?

Mark Sieverkropp: I don’t know it would have been fun. Everyone would have looked at us funny which would have been enjoyable. You would have heard us smacking our lips while eating.

Scott Barlow: That would have been awkward. Now I know why we didn’t do that.

If you haven’t, go back and check out the first 40-60 episodes where Mark makes many appearances as he helped get this show up and running and turned it into what it is today.

You are back. Let’s catch people up because a lot has happened. You are going to help me dissect the question of whether people should start a business, how to go through that decision process, and whether it should be a thing. Before that, what has happened in your world?

Mark Sieverkropp: What has happened in my world? I’m trying to remember the last time I was on. I have been doing affiliate management and running launches, which has been fun. I was telling a friend I feel like I could create and launch a product in my sleep now. I met with a mutual friend the other day on the phone and laid out an entire plan for him to promote a product as I was walking; which was kind of cool because I realized I know how to do this. I’ve done a lot of that. Also, germane to this conversation, (look at the use of that word). I’ve been starting a business of my own. I’m an independent contractor with the affiliate stuff but I’ve started backyardsoccercoach.com, which is a passion of mine. I love to play soccer and legitimately say I’m working when I’m out kicking around a soccer ball. Those are the two things I’m doing among other things: church, family and community responsibilities, which keep me busy.

Scott Barlow: That is quite a bit. Knowing you I know you’ve had a ton of fun in the affiliate space. For people that don’t understand that how do you describe that? I know you’ve attempted to answer it before. What are you actually doing?

Mark Sieverkropp: We should have my wife answer that. She loves when people ask what I do because should has no idea. He does something on the computer, there is money that comes in so that’s good. Affiliate marketing is simply the online version of coupons in a way. Essentially we manage the relationship between the product creator and people who want to promote their product. When they promote it as an affiliate they earn a commission for each sale. It’s like advertising but you can determine what you are spending money on and you only spend money if you earn. We manage that relationship. We help affiliates promote products. I’ve helped Scott. We have people in the career space that are interested in Scott’s products and we give them the emails to send, graphics, and answer questions on when and how to send. We manage that all and payments and make sure they get paid for what they did. I tell people it is online marketing.

Scott Barlow: It is. I was trying to look up the last episode where you and I sat down when you were transitioning. Quick story, Mark helped me get the podcast and company up and running and then left.

Mark Sieverkropp: So Scott could make money.

Scott Barlow: Our profit went up drastically and Mark thinks it’s because of him. And then he came back to support us in the affiliate role which he has a ton of expertise in. Now he is focusing on the other two pieces even more. Which is cool. We get you at all the career transition points, appropriate for this show.

Mark Sieverkropp: Right. So you bring me back up. Mark is changing what he is doing, let’s talk to him.

Scott Barlow: Let’s dive into this question. We have so many people that listen to the show that have it on their wish list or bucket list, must-have-list, or some list. HTYCers make a lot of lists. They want to start a business and think it’s the thing to do. There are a whole bunch of reasons for it. So many people have a dream or a fantasy in their mind and they fantasize about what it would be like and how they can be in control of their lives or not have a boss telling them what to do - flexibility, own schedule own income, in control of their destiny. All of that sounds great but then it comes down the question whether this is right for you and something that would be good for you or is it just a dream and not good for your situation? We hope to answer that today.

Mark Sieverkropp: We were talking about this earlier. As I thought about it, starting a business has been romanticized in our culture. It is the cool thing to do. It’s not that someone shouldn’t start a business but there is a lot to it. As we go through this episode we aren’t trying to discourage you but want you to have an accurate picture. When I started my business as an independent contractor there was a lot to it. There is stuff I couldn’t believe I had to worry about and do. It wasn’t bad and it was the best for me but there is a lot to it. There are a lot of things not shown in the article “7 Reasons to Start Your Business Now” that you need to recognize. I tell some people what I do and things I deal with and they say no thanks I’ll go work my 8-5 job and be happy. That’s fine, we need those people too. Having a business has been romanticized.

Scott Barlow: I totally agree, a lot of it has. There are a ridiculous amount of articles. I have a bias and a little bit of an influence lens looking at it because we help people start businesses. The reason we wanted to do this episode is because we get this question on a consistent basis and get questions about businesses that people are starting, not for the wrong reasons but because they don’t have the total picture. We put together a set of questions that you can ask yourself to guide you to that answer of whether it’s something you should do and then you can start instead of just thinking. If it’s not something you should do disband the idea and move on and then you aren’t forever wondering if you should be acting upon it. So it’s not a regret.

Mark Sieverkropp: I was talking to my friend Matt McWilliams that I work with and he said you are a better writer if you put the bottom line upfront, bluff. The bottom line is, should I start a business? Maybe. You are welcome now you don’t have to listen to the rest of the episode.

Scott Barlow: If we can take you from a maybe to a yes or no through some of the questions, then that is the goal.

Mark Sieverkropp: Now that you mention it that is what we tell our clients in affiliate management. People hate to get nos. But when we ask people to promote our product we would rather have a no than a maybe. That’s what we hope to do with this episode - to give you a better sense of yes that is for me and I’ll take the trade-offs or no I don’t want to do that. It’s not a good idea. And be happy, and that’s fine. That is what we will do with these four questions.

Scott Barlow: Question one: What do you really want out of starting a business?

This is probably the most important. It can be hard to route through and really try to determine this. The easiest way is to sit down and write down anything that pops into your mind - write it down on pad and paper, on an iPad pro, whatever it is, google doc. Record the stuff and really try and determine what is most important in starting a business. Brain dump and make a list of everything you think you will get when you start a business.

Anything to add?

Mark Sieverkropp: Brain dump at the beginning, but also keep the paper near you as you go along. As you hear someone talk about something or you read an article you will think of things and you want to write those down. You may want to be careful if you are at work doing it. Don’t post it on your cubicle wall.

Scott Barlow: Yeah blow it up on your wall. (laughing)

Mark Sieverkropp: I think we can agree when we were working at a job there were certain things we didn’t want to deal with or thought we would do other things instead. You want to recognize those and write them down. You have to be clear why you are starting it instead of what you are trying to run from. You talk a lot about this in the career space. You don’t want to start a business just because you hate your boss. It might be a good reason to start the conversation but not a good reason to start the business. You may realize you are a way worse boss.

Scott Barlow: I’m a harder boss than any other boss that I’ve worked for.

Mark Sieverkropp: Yeah you go to work way earlier than they ever made you.

Scott Barlow: I’m going to go ask myself this question. I just thought of that. I think that as you get this list down the next piece is prioritizing it by importance so you can take all the stuff you have down and you can then do a one-two comparison to prioritize if you have a massive list it can be overwhelming. Think of the one-two comparison like glasses. If you have glasses you will understand or if you have met someone with glasses. Mark doesn’t have prescription glasses but has blue light glasses. Think about it this way when you walk in to buy a set of glasses you have someone who is experienced on the other end. Instead of letting you pull out four hundred sets of glasses and decide what you like, they will compare one set of glasses to another and break it down to small chunks and prioritize to decide which is more important. You get a gut feeling and then you take the more important one and compare it to the next one.

You can use the optical approach and prioritize yourself until you have the most important stuff near the top. You can break it down and make it less overwhelming. You need to prioritize because if you have the more important things to you at the top, like flexibility, creativity, and deciding how things get done, you might realize you don’t need a business to do that.

Mark Sieverkropp: I realize that as we were going through this that the approach you use with people for careers is important for a business as well. There are so many things you feel like you can’t have in a job because you’ve never had it before. That’s not necessarily true. Other people have it but you never have. Business owners don’t have a corner market on flexibility, creativity, and using their strengths. We just feel that because it’s how it is portrayed in that article “7 Reasons You Should Start a Business.” Certainly there are those things in a business but you can get to a point where you are completely beholden to that business and can lose all of that. It goes both ways. You have to identify what is important but then decide if the business you are thinking about is the best way based on what you like to do, your strengths and weaknesses, family situation, etc.

Scott Barlow: We know some of the things important to people to allow happiness through a ton of different research. The information is out there but most of us don’t realize it or ignore it. If you want more information go back to episode 170 where we talk about the things you must have in your career to be happy and it will help you understand. One thing is freedom to decide how the work gets done. If you don’t have that then most people aren’t happy. You get into micro-management. Go back and listen to that episode. In this case if you have those things it doesn’t necessarily need to happen in your own business. Just because you haven’t seen it doesn’t mean it isn’t out there. There are Flexjobs and remote.com and places like that that allow you to really only go after jobs and roles that do have more flexibility or do have more decision making power or more of that type of freedom.

Mark Sieverkropp: There are different ways to go about it. You can start a business or be an independent contractor, which is what I do. It’s like having your own business but kind of having a boss. There is freelancing. There a lot of different ways. There is more than one way to skin a cat. Whether it’s a different job or career position. Different business models can be better or worse for you.

As you line up what is most important you get a lens to start saying and looking at different models and seeing what is a good fit. You used the glasses comparison and I was thinking about when you go to the mall with your wife and she asks is this one good or this one holding up two things. You are immediately supposed to understand what it would look like if they were wearing it. Here’s a set of pros and cons to try to slowly narrow it down.

This isn’t something you jump into tomorrow. We hear stories about people just walking out of their jobs and hanging up their shingle the next day and starting their business. That isn’t a good idea for most of us. I spent several months talking to the guy I work with and trying it part-time. I think that’s an important thing to remember. Do not just jump into it. You don’t make a decision over the weekend and just do it, unless you want a ton of stress and have your spouse annoyed at you. There is a lot to it you don’t realize.

Scott Barlow: Speaking to that, it leads right into the next question.

Question Two: Are you more interested in actually starting the business or simply running or operating a business? There are two big distinctions there because starting a business and getting it up going from zero to one is a much different animal than going from one to one hundred, or pick an analogy there. Maintaining, running, operating, and growing is completely different than getting something off the ground the first time around.

Mark Sieverkropp: it definitely is. It goes back to what are your priorities? What do you really want out of it? You may need to do some networking. Maybe you need to be in your bosses position and it has nothing to do with running a business but you want to be directing what happens and have more input in how things are done. You need to ask yourself that. Scott can tell you, when you were starting Happen to Your Career it was a lot of three or four am mornings. You still work Saturdays. I was at your house the other day and you were working all Saturday. There is a lot to starting a business and building it up. I’m going back to that article of “7 Reasons You Should Start a Business Today.”

Scott Barlow: Again, some people are not ever going to want to work Saturdays. I love it. I never know what day it is. Weeks or weekends don’t necessarily matter to me. The last two days Wednesday and Thursday, we are recording on a Friday, we pulled my kids out of school and took them up to a place to go rock wall climbing and play laser tag during the middle of the week and we have that freedom and flexibility. But I will intentionally work on Saturday to make sure everything we need to do gets done. There are both sides to it.

Mark Sieverkropp: That is hard for people. That is a difficult transition. When I started, we owned our own business and worked from home which is another challenge. It’s a challenge for your family. It’s a big adjustment. I’ve been doing it for nearly two years and it’s still difficult and an adjustment. Working from home and setting my own hours. Everyone thinks that setting your own hours is great; you sit in your pjs all day and don’t work until 9 AM and you are done at 2 PM with a two hour lunch. Sure some days I do that because of circumstances. The other day I had some appointments and I was done at 1 PM. I got home that night though and worked from 9 PM – 11 PM. Some Saturdays I have to do three or four hours of work and some days I’m up early. You have to take that into account. It may not work for you and your family. Your spouse may say it’s a deal breaker because they like the 8 AM - 5 PM schedule and knowing that is what happens. You have to think about that or it causes a ton of stress.

Scott Barlow: Those are several things you want to consider in question four as well. We will re-bring that it up again in a minute. Distinguishing between starting the business and running and operating it. Think about it in terms of when you start a business there is a ton of failure. The amount of failure you go through is very significant. Depending on where you are in your journey, it’s a spectrum. You have different levels of comfort. Failure for me, I don’t know, is like a badge of honor. I don’t look at it as failure. Alyssa and I teach our kids this. It’s not bad. You are that much closer to being able to do whatever you are trying to do. It didn’t work out there was a mistake but it isn’t failure it’s a process of learning.

But depending on where you are you have to understand that going into it. Starting a business can be fun because you are rapidly exposed to new things and continually changing how you are approaching it for what is working and isn’t. When you start a business you cannot have a tolerance for doing anything for long that isn’t working or you won’t get it off the ground. The opposite side is that if you are on your failure journey trying to get used to the idea that failure is learning it may not be the right time for you. Instead you should expose yourself to other types of mistakes and failures to ease into it. How do you think about that? I’m super curious.

Mark Sieverkropp: I think I’m glad that you finished the sentence that started with exposing yourself. Left turn, but yes I agree. There are very different opportunities for failure. Certainly there are ways to fail in a job and we’ve gotten used to those. I’ve had that conversation with my wife several times. Any of us who have gone through public school system have been trained for the failures and risks of being in a job but not as business owners. Like it or not. I’m on the school board in my town and I’m all for public education for the most part - though our kids may not be in the system next year. There isn’t anything wrong with that but you have to understand we’ve been trained to not only be okay with the risk of a job but trained to shy away from the risk of starting a business.

Putting yourself out there and accepting risk every day and knowing that you may fail today but you still get up and do it again tomorrow. It depends on where you are with that and whether you are okay with failing and stressing about how you will pay the bills sometimes. When we talk about figuring out what you are interested in it goes back to that list. Not just what is important but how important it is. Is it as important as the security of what you are doing now or the security in a job, even though that is a humorous phrase, that there is a level of security? There are certain things you trade off being an employee that you don’t have to worry about like whether the doors are open tomorrow, though you do in a sense, but it’s not your main concern.

I think you are right it’s understanding the types of risks and challenges you will face and realizing unless you have been raised in a certain way or developed it you will face different challenges. If it is something you embrace and like and enjoy then maybe starting a business is for you, but it’s different jumping in to a role where you are running a business rather than starting it.

Scott Barlow: There are two ways to think about that piece. If you are at the point where you are willing to grow through that rapid failure cycle and you are expecting that, you may not be comfortable with it but know it happens and it’s the right decision for you, that’s awesome. It’s another red flag, or good flag, opposite of red flag that you should look for. It’s an indicator you should go for it and start a business.

On the flip side if you are not then you can go down the track of doing something to expand where you are on the failure spectrum and your personal growth. I’m thinking episode 22, where you talked about project success and exposing yourself to things like this through projects. That’s an option or an alternative if you are interested in other things with owning a business. You could look at the options that allow you to operate a business, or own and manage a business, or run the business versus the startup process; like franchises or buying an already existing business with great systems. I’ve owned a franchise in the past, it is very good because depending on the franchise they all offer different levels of support. There are a few great opportunities that will help you understand and train you on how to operate the business most effectively so you aren’t completely alone. It’s different than the startup process and creating something from nothing. We have a great episode, not long ago, 166 with Ace Chapman where he helps lay out the things to consider when buying a business. Go back and listen to that and it can help you determine whether running or operating a business or starting a business is good for you.

Mark Sieverkropp: If you have a name like Ace you have to listen to what he says. You hear the name Ace Chapman and you think he’s good at what he does, and I don’t even know what that is. I’m obligated to listen at that point. You are right, there are those options and they are good for a lot of people. I’ve never done it but I’ve heard you talk about it and we see franchises everywhere. A lot of business are franchises. There is a lot to creating processes when starting a business. Ever thing from managing books and accounting to the process of offering a service and product. If those aren’t what you want to do then a franchise might be it. They’ll say here’s your process go do it. It takes away a lot. That is a good option to look at.

Scott Barlow: We are spending probably ten plus percent of our time creating processes which may or not sound sizeable but it is a sizeable chunk. Even the conversation you and I are going to have later today is deciding what the processes are. What processes are in existence for your role and what will transition to the next person. Having that handed to you also has a failure cycle that goes with it. Check out the Ace Chapman episode 166. It can help you understand more of those questions.

Here’s another question. This is a simple question but helps you diagnose what might be stopping you and helps you get ready to answer the question of whether you should or shouldn’t do this. To decide whether you can stop worrying about it or whether you should get immediately going.

Question Three: Do you have anything right now that is actually stopping you from starting a business?

This is another thing that you can but down on the list and decide if there are actually things stopping you or if they are just perceived things. Not just for the business idea, put that aside for the minute. Many people get stuck saying I’d start a business but I don’t have the right idea. It’s not ideas that start businesses, that’s a mask for a different problem. We’ll tackle that in a future episode and help you go through and get the right business idea for you. Let’s push that aside for now and ask if there is something else actually stopping you such as a demanding job or huge chunks of your time being taken up by other things that will get interfered with. It goes back to what do you really want out of it and what is more important; that prioritization piece. Maybe you have something going on with church that is incredibly important that you aren’t going to give up. Are there other places in your life to make time so you can get going?

Mark Sieverkropp: I think with all the questions, but with this one specifically, if you are married or have a significant other you need to have this conversation with them. When you are in this type of relationship the concerns they have are just as valid as your concerns. You have to have the conversation. When I transitioned to owning my own business and being an independent contractor my wife and I had a lot of conversations. I was going to be working with a guy named Matt and we had a lot of conversations and with his wife as well. We really went over the requirements, what would happen, and what it would look like. It was hard. It was difficult for my wife because she is risk adverse. It took a lot of discussion on what it would look like and whether it was something stopping us or if we could address it and move forward. I would recommend that anyone playing a significant role in your life should be part of the conversation. There may be things that are deal breakers for them. It may stop you because of their feelings or needs or aversion to risk. Those are legitimate things that could stop you from starting a business right now. You need to identify those up front because you don’t want to deal with that on top of the stress from starting the business.

Scott Barlow: Otherwise you start feeling “they are killing of my dream” and stuff like that which doesn’t need to happen if you are considering this upfront. Do you have anything right now that is actually stopping you from starting a business? Get it down on paper and have the conversation with your significant other or anyone with a vested interest.

This last question, question four, goes back to what you were talking about earlier Mark, that this isn’t easy. The startup process isn’t easy.

Question Four: Are you willing to go for the long haul? Are you willing to commit to this?

It may look differently than when you start, in fact I promise it will, you will start with one business idea and plan and when you get beyond 90 days it will evolve and change. If it doesn’t it will never start. You will learn things and have different information. There are a lot of different things that will happen. You have to adjust and pivot. I promise you it will look differently.

But are you willing to commit to this for the long haul for the reasons you’ve identified in step one?

Mark Sieverkropp: I think if you take the leap and jump into it full force. It applies also if you are doing a side hustle, but certainly if you want to start a business it is very difficult. On the flip side once you get a taste of it, and you like it, you better be ready to do it for the long haul. It would be difficult to go back to a job. Your whole mindset changes. You have to be ready or you might be twice as miserable if you have to go back to a job in six months. There is a lot to it and it’s a big decision. It goes back to our early discussion, make sure it’s what you want to do and take the decision slowly and make sure you pencil it out, and look at it from different angles and ask all of the questions. It’s a long term decision and isn’t something you just try for a couple weeks thinking if I make a million we will continue if not we will go back. It’s not like that.

Scott you worked on Happen to Your Career for a long time before it got where it is today. It takes that effort, concentrated hard effort. You need to ask yourself that question am I willing to do it not only on the fun days but the days that it aren’t and I’m tired and exhausted and want to do a million other things. Are you willing to do it at that point? That’s the question you have to ask. If you are not then I would consider finding a better job or a career you like better.

As we were talking through this I think it’s important to clarify and say I feel like we are going through this we are trying to talk people out of starting a business. There are some really good things about it. I love it. I could never go back. Scott and I have had this conversation. We are utterly unemployable from this point on. For us there is nothing else we could do. I could not go to a job where I sit there from 8-5 ever again. There are so many awesome things with opening a business. I don’t want people to get this idea that Scott and Mark are just trying to talk me out of my dream. That’s not it at all. There is a process you have to go through.

There is a ton of really good stuff about it. There is some of that romanticized stuff about owning a business that is true but it’s colored by the stuff that’s not so much fun. It really does depend on your personality and your tolerance for risk and what you really want out of it. It is really good too. There is a lot of really awesome stuff to owning a business, like working for yourself and setting your own schedule. There are both sides. I didn’t want to get to the end of the episode and have anyone think it was all doom and gloom and all terrible.

Like you said Scott you spent the last two days rock climbing with your kids. That’s pretty cool and fun. I spent a week in Nashville with my family. I was working while I was there but we got to do that. Scott is going to watch his kid’s school performance later today. That’s hard for a lot of people to do. That’s a really cool thing. I will say you can do that with a job depending on the job. But there’s give and take in all of it. There is good stuff to starting and owning a business and running a franchise or whatever it is. There is good to both.

Scott Barlow: To build on that, I think about this stuff and I think to a lot of people it could sound negative. For example, you mentioned getting up early, I started getting up earlier and earlier to find more time to devote toward the business because I decided I wanted to do it. I didn’t love getting up early but I absolutely loved what I got to do once I got up. It made getting up at 3:55 to 4 in the morning completely tolerable and even exciting. The act of getting up in the first place was not that exciting. That is another thing to look for. That can help you answer the question of whether you are willing to go for the long haul. I love how you framed it out: When it is hard are you willing to be there for that versus just the easy and exciting stuff? It was hard to get up every single day at 4 a.m. even when I didn’t want to and still do the stuff. But it was exciting and I was willing to do it because everything else lined up.

Mark Sieverkropp: I think it’s important to realize and I mentioned it in passing earlier, you think it’s hard in a job at times not having flexibility of schedule or being required to do things, but it’s way harder when you don’t have a schedule. Having to sit down and make a schedule. I guarantee it would have been easier for you Scott if your boss said your schedule. I know at your previous job you had to go in at the middle of the night, but that is easier than you having to tell yourself I have to get up at 3:55 a.m. tomorrow. It is so easy to look at the clock, and there are mornings I do it, I won’t lie I did it this morning, I looked at the clock and groaned, thinking maybe I just won’t get up. But nope, I have to do it I made a commitment. I guarantee it is easier. It is harder to get up and do those things when you don’t have someone else telling you to do it. It’s harder to get the work you need to get done that day. Especially if you are working from home and your kids are upstairs playing or the rest of the family is going o the store and you want to get out and help your wife at Walmart. There are days I do that, but there are other days when I realize I can’t because I have things I need to do.

If you think it is hard dealing with a schedule when someone else is setting it, it’s a lot harder to be your own boss, to be your own task driver. It’s important to realize and understand that. It goes both ways. It’s funny I talk to people that say they couldn’t do what I do because they’d just sit and watch television all day, that they wouldn’t have the focus to do anything. But you might have the opposite problem, I do. It can be seven at night and my wife can’t believe I haven’t stopped yet. There are challenges on both sides to be aware of. When you set your own schedule you have to determine your own schedule, which I guess is the best way to say it.

Scott Barlow: Side note, I have a Netflix binge problem. I’ve had to solve this. Here is my easy fix for the Netflix binge problem. 1) I’ve taken it off a lot of my devices so it’s not easily available. (Especially since Netflix has started producing Marvel Comics series which is awesome). 2) The easiest thing I’ve done, which has worked every time so far, which may not be for you, but when I’ve watched half an episode and realize I’m staring at the top of the ledge and I’m going to spend twenty hours diving into something, I’ll skip to the last episode and watch the last half of it so that I only spend half an hour. It totally ruins it for me. But it saves me from spending literally 20 hours because I can’t stop myself. I have little willpower.

Mark Sieverkropp: Here’s what I do. I binge on Netflix a little bit, not to the clinical issue problem that you have. But here is what I do, it’s one of the cool things about owning your own business and working for home. I batch the things that are mindless tasks and do them while I’m watching television at the end of the day. Like emails or copying things from spreadsheets. Things I can do without thinking. That’s kind of cool. I could never do that at work. This is mindless so I’m just going to pull my iPad and watch four hours of Elementary while I work. You can’t do that normally so it’s cool owing my own business. There are days I’ll eat lunch and then sit and watch television for two hours because that is the type of work I’m doing. It’s kind of neat. I also work outside sometimes which is nice under my gazebo. Not now while it is cold but in a couple months I will look forward to it. I know you do that too sometimes Scott like at coffee shops. It’s nice to change your scenery.

I can tell you it is much more fun doing hard work, or work you don’t want to do, when you are outside and its 78 degrees with a light breeze and sun. It’s just better. There was one day I was watching a family of quails walk across my yard and I had a conversation with them. I’m like, “Wow I work from home and don’t have interaction with people” (laughing). I’m talking to quails.

Scott Barlow: This is the other side of clinical if it’s not Netflix.

It is a ton of fun and adds a whole different element. Your decision is going to be based on what is right for you. If you don’t like talking to quail maybe it’s not your thing or maybe you cultivate a different type of business to do what you like to do. If you haven’t already made a decision to start or not start a business and you’ve been considering it for a lengthy time, more than a month, maybe years, go through and answer these four questions so you can make a decision and get started or decide it’s not what you want.

Mark, I really appreciate you getting up extra early.

Mark Sieverkropp: Only for you. You are the only person I’d get up to record something for at six in the morning. Not true, I might do it for David Ralph. But only you two.

Scott Barlow: David is a friend of the show, he has an episode, go back and listen to it, and oh my goodness, bonus surprise at the end.

Mark Sieverkropp: I literally listen to that like once a month (laughing).

Scott Barlow: I fell over laughing.

Mark Sieverkropp: Literally fell over.

Scott Barlow: Yes, literally. Mark, by the way, I don’t know that we talked a ton about backyard soccer coach. If you want to see a business getting up and running in action this has been Mark’s side project. It’s really cool and I was super excited when he first told me about it. It really lines up with his expertise and what you do. I thought it was super cool. What can people find if they go to backyardsoccercoach.com?

Mark Sieverkropp: Backyardsoccercoach.com is essentially for those of you that have children that play soccer and you know nothing about it. It’s not necessarily for people who have played their entire lives, but you might get something out of it. I’m really trying to help parents that have kids that play soccer that have only kicked a soccer ball once in middle school P.E. They want to help their kid be successful. It’s a lot of resources and tools. I’m creating a series called Soccer 101 that helps people with the basic rules, what the players do, and the types of equipment they need. It’s a basic soccer education with resources and tools for soccer parents to help their kids.

Scott Barlow: I think you are underselling it a bit to be honest. I was thinking the other day that it’s perfect for me. I played soccer when I was a kid. My youngest plays, Grayson. There was a call for coaches. He’s been playing and I was trying to think of what drills I would do if I were coaching little kids. Obviously you don’t need to know a ton but I was thinking I’d ask my friend Mark and go to backyardsoccercoach.com. That would be really helpful in that situation. I know and understand the basic rules, but I have no idea when it comes to working with Grayson where I should be utilizing my time even though I know the basic elements.

Mark Sieverkropp: It’s very different playing for a bit and then being able to help someone else learn how to play. It’s a very different skill set. That’s what I am trying to do. Help parents be able to do that and have a good direction to go in. It is better when you say it, you make it sound better.

Scott Barlow: It always sounds better.

In all seriousness that’s why I found the idea valuable with talking to you about it and you telling me about different drills then checking it out. I found it valuable. If you are interested in seeing a business up and running in action then go check it out or if you have little kids in soccer and you want to understand how to work with them regardless of whether you know anything about soccer or it’s been a long time since you played go check it out.

Mark, I really, really appreciate you making the time and getting up early, even if there is one other person in the world you would do it for.

Mark Sieverkropp: Absolutely happy to do it. Had a good time and we brought up things that I continue to think about and things I continue to ask myself as I’m starting and running my business as a contractor.

Scott Barlow: I really appreciate it.

Mark Sieverkropp: Thanks Scott.

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Time & Energy and Your Career Change

Q: WHERE DO I FIND THE TIME AND ENERGY TO CHANGE MY CAREER?

Some people don’t give their mental energy enough credit.

Whether you are currently:

  • At a job that no longer satisfies your needs
  • Looking to move yourself into another industry to better your career
  • Thinking of starting your own business

Your mental energy is key in finding the time and space to focus on how to change careers.

If you are thinking that it is impossible to try and conquer this task while holding down a full-time job that is draining what energy you have left, that is understandable.

BUT! If you’re serious about changing careers, you need to make finding the time to create that extra energy to sustain yourself through your upcoming career transition. You need to make it a priority to ease that mental stress, so you can focus on more important paths – like your career change.

Here are 3 things you can do to jump start your energy to drive you to find that illusive extra time and energy to put your career plans into motion:

1. HOW TO CHANGE CAREERS: START YOUR DAY BY PUTTING YOURSELF FIRST.

Make the mind switch to focus on yourself first. It sounds simple. But, it won’t feel as simple as it sounds until you begin to implement this switch on a daily basis. This will help you not only get more done, but it will also help you get the ball rolling on your career change and continue the momentum you need to push you to follow through with your career transition.

Example: Our client, Eric, began waking up 30 minutes earlier to acclimate to the morning and kick-start his career transition by taking that extra time and energy in the morning to identify companies that he wanted to work with in his next career. The extra homework that he did in the early morning hours led him to network with the people he needed to in the organizations he was hoping to work at, as well as several job offers.

2. RE-EVALUATE YOUR DIET AND REPLACE THE “ENERGY-DEPLETING” FOODS WITH HEALTHIER OPTIONS

You can start by taking 15 minutes out of your day to write down your meals and snacks from the day. Choose one or two things that have the highest impact on your productivity. Find out which foods slow you down & consume less of them. Take this task in small steps, you don’t want to completely shock your body.

Example: Cutting out carbs, sugars, and soda will clean up your diet and improve your energy levels. You can replace those foods with fruits and vegetables and start drinking tea or sparkling water to fulfill those voids.

3. TAKE SMALL PIECES OF YOUR LIFE AND PUT THEM ON AUTO-PILOT

Take out the energy and time suck that small activities such as decision-making about some of your daily activities (insignificant decisions like what to eat for breakfast, when to do your household chores, grocery shopping, etc.) take away from you during the day. You may not know it, but the energy that you spend making these small decisions throughout your day is draining you, slowly.

You can try leaving the insignificant decisions for the end of the day or create a basic routine with easy meals to make for the week. Be more efficient by creating systems of where you spend your time.

Example: Make a decision to eat the same thing every single time for 6-12 weeks. Use that extra mental energy from during those 6-12 weeks to focus on your career change. You want to eliminate the daily irritations to add energy, willpower, decision-making power to your career change.

Try to layer one of these 3 things into your life now. Slowly create that extra time and energy for yourself to get that extra leg up on your career change.

Take care of yourself mentally and physically and you will be able to sustain yourself throughout your career change.

If you’re serious about it, it is worth it.

EPISODE LINKS AND RESOURCES
Relevant Resources
https://www.happentoyourcareer.com/071-get-intentional-get-results-with-olivia-gamber/
https://www.happentoyourcareer.com/076-your-job-search-in-the-social-media-age-with-al-smith/

Scott Barlow: This is Scott Anthony Barlow and you are listening to Happen to Your Career. This is the show that helps you figure out what work fits you by exploring other’s stories. We bring on all kinds of experts like Emilie Wapnick who helps people that have more than one true calling. Or people that have amazing stories like Jerrad Shivers that found his ideal job by learning his strengths. These people are just like you. They have gone from where they are to what they really want to be doing.

Today we have so much fun stuff. This is one of the things that I’d say is one of the bigger stopping points we haven’t spent a lot of time on in 172 episodes. We are already at 172 which blows me away. Thank you so much for supporting the show, for listening, emailing us, going and checking out our email list, and the great resources we’ve put together over 4 years. Those have all been inspired by your questions and what you need. Keep it coming! The same goes for this episode.

We have noticed a few things through working with thousands of people through myself and my company. Today we are going to talk about one thing that doesn’t get mentioned but is a huge need. We are going to dive into how to be able to have the energy so you can find the time to make a big career change. We will also talk about why that energy is sometimes elusive and where it is going and how to get it back or make sure it never leaves. We will go into different ways you can do it right now. These are easy steps we have used with clients to help them make the marathon trip that is career change actually happening. When we look at career change it is a marathon and not a sprint. It doesn’t happen in a week or two but usually closer to months in some cases, or a majority of cases it is spread over multiple months. When you are making that change it requires a different approach than just resume tactics. Here are a few different strategies that will make it easier for you, but not magic pill stuff. I’m more interested in allowing you to be able to sustain in making the change so it happens.

It is just me today. I want to cover with you some of the ways you can do this right now. I mentioned it earlier, but so many people come to us, maybe even you, and know you need to make a change and are planning on it. Maybe you’ve been working on it but you consistently find that you don’t have the energy or the time to do it. You are at your job and maybe you love that job but it consumes a bunch of you and you don’t feel like you have a lot left to work on a career change. Maybe it’s the opposite and that job is draining you because you aren’t excited. It is taking everything from you. That is pushing you over the edge. When you get off work you aren’t excited to do something that is extra.

Whatever situation we find that if you do not consistently have the energy and aren’t intentionally taking steps to have energy the career change doesn’t happen or it is significantly slowed down. It could be halved or quartered. I don’t see a lot of, or any honestly, career coaches talking about this. I see career coaches focused on how to get your resume through auto-tracking systems instead of focusing on how you sustain the long journey of the change.

I want to go over three main ways you can do this. Each of these ways are ways I have personally used and used with clients. They aren’t always easy to do, like much of what we teach and much of the stuff we talk about with guests. It’s not always easy but worth it. I want to help make it even easier for you.

Let’s break some of it down.

The first thing that I want you to begin doing is going to sound so simple, but it is not simple until you build it into a routine. Start the day by putting yourself first.

There are a lot of different reasons behind this. This could be a powerful mindset switch. Let me explain. If you have determined that you aren’t interested in impeding a large chunk of your life at your current job it will be important and empowering to focus on yourself first. When you get in the office and you have a ton of needs waiting - like your boss wanting the latest report, email to check, reports, and other deadlines you’ve forgotten - it gets mind numbing. When you get home you don’t want to do anything else. You’ve heard Eric, and Jerrod, and other shows we can link, but with both of them we worked on how to start off your day when you are the freshest and have the most energy to work on the things that will get you where you want to go before the pressures hit and before you’ve made it to the office and others are asking things of you. Before you deplete your energy.

Start when you are at your freshest and give to yourself first. I firmly believe in this. It will scare most of us because most of us are people-pleasers and we give and give to other people. It can be hard to put yourself first. I have found that the times where I have done this in any life change, but especially career changes, of which I’ve made many, the times I’ve done this went so much smoother. When I wake up and I am one of my first priorities, and am working on things that will move me forward to where I want to be, there are many immediate and by-product benefits.

The first thing is that your energy isn’t depleted. You are at a higher level of focus. Maybe you need to wake up for forty minutes to an hour which is fine. Take your situation into account, but once you are up and settled in then you will find that you are going to be able to put a different amount of energy and head space toward this. I mentioned Eric earlier, he was getting up a little earlier than he normally would, by about half an hour, which would allow him to acclimate and then spend time working on identifying different companies he wanted to contact to build relationships. He ended up interacting with about thirty different companies. That was huge because he built a ton of relationships that led to job offers. That was really cool. His secret was doing what he could during the mornings when he was at his best before the energy depleted because he had a demanding job that was taking a lot.

When you are putting yourself first it will allow you to build momentum. I know when I was doing this, and Eric said the same, I would feel accomplished. I would do this work at the beginning, finishing an application or identifying a couple people to contact later, or I would finish all my prep work so on my lunch hour I could make a couple calls. Whatever it happened to be I felt very accomplished. A lot of our clients describe the same feeling like I feel like I’ve got a ton done. You feel good walking into work and it ironically makes your work day better. Which allows you to have a little energy left. These all feed on each other. It is easier to do the same thing they next day. When you’ve done it for two weeks it starts to become a part of your routine. When you’ve done it for that period of time you start seeing benefits from it. You are getting more done and building the momentum that makes you feel more positive about this marathon that the job search and career change can be.

That is thing one. Make it a mindset switch to put yourself first and then the simple action is to start the day. Even if you aren’t a morning person. Do it even for thirty minutes. Maybe you just get up fifteen minutes early and work on something for yourself as you make the career change. It’ll be huge for you. This is the same thing I did later when I was working on building a side business. I started taking it to extremes and getting up fifteen minutes earlier every week. It was about 3:55 a.m. to find more time and invest more of my energy into myself. That is another example. The easiest way to start is go the bed fifteen minutes earlier and get up fifteen minutes earlier. That is step one.

The next piece after you have done that for a few days and mastered getting up build in the piece where you are taking the time to do something for yourself first. If it is career change for you, which a lot of people are here for, this will be incredibly important. Do something that is going to push you forward. We have other episodes on what you can do. We have Olivia Gamber talking about upgrading your career and giving suggestions. We have Al Smith with LinkedIn. There are a number of other things you could do during that time. The important part is making the initial mindset shift and realizing you need to put yourself first to get energy and results and follow it with action. Starting every day by putting yourself first.

That is thing one and it may or may not sound like much. But we have found it to be something that isn’t talked about much that can make a big impact in your career and life change. You can get the results that you want. The results trail when you take different actions.

Thing two. This one sounds obvious at first. I want to give you ways that you can implement it as well. This is about diet. I’m not a health expert. This is a huge excitement/passion/interest of mine. I do a lot of studying looking for different resources and understand how this stuff actually works. I’m not interested in telling you about a particular lifestyle change or anything like that. I want to offer one piece of advice that has worked for many of our clients. I’m not a health coach or anything like that but the one major change you can make is simply choose one or two things that you are going to consume less of that are slowing you down right now.

Let’s break that down as to why it can be important. First, you are making a lot of changes already with a career change, in the job search, and/or building a side business. You are making a lot of change and devoting energy to that. When you are trying to change your diet completely and trying to adjust to a lifestyle and doing it in a big way it will be difficult to keep up. Instead look at what you consume on a normal basis and just remove one or two types of food that are going to slow you down. It could be carbs, breads, sugars, soda, anything. Take a look at what you eat on a regular basis during the week and choose one or two that will have the highest impact. For me, the two biggest pieces slowing me down were different types of sugars and breads. I ended up ruling all of those out for a period of time when I needed a huge amount of energy. That was a big lifestyle change. If you haven’t done it before then I would say just start with one of those pieces. Just one. For example, I eat a lot of ketchup, which has a ton of sugar, or a ton of soda. Removing one piece to start with can be huge. The philosophy is not only to add things that give more energy but removing the impediments and barriers from the energy you already have. Just another way to think about it, like the opposite of number one.

An easy way to implement this is to initially write down what you are eating for a couple days. You can probably chase back your meals and snacks in an average week. Just take about fifteen minutes and make it easy. Look at everything and try to determine the top two or three that you believe are slowing you down. Make your hypothesis and then research those couple of foods and see if they are actually slowing you down. If they are pick one or two to eliminate. I would say try and determine what you will replace it with. What will you substitute in for that? That can be helpful rather than just eliminating. If it is something you rely on, like soda, I used to drink a lot of it and if you would have just removed it I would not have had anything else. I had to replace it. In some cases it doesn’t have to be something perfect for you. Replacing soda with coffee is still a better alternative even though caffeine all day isn’t incredibly valuable either. You get the point. If you substitute it out with something better for you it will be more helpful across the board.

After you make the decision tell someone else so they can hold you accountable. It could be a partner, spouse, colleague, or someone else who wants to do it too. Tell someone else and give them permission to hold you accountable.

It may sound something like “hey I’m doing this so I can get more energy. I’m going off soda. I would love if you can ask me once a day or a week when you see me how I’m doing on that? I will give you a full report and it might sound silly but it will help me a ton because I feel accountable to someone and I will be more likely to do it.”

Any person that you are going to feel accountable to, anyone you trust, can do this. That is thing two. Instead of layering something on let’s pull something out. Choose one or two things you are ingesting and remove them and replace them with something else.

The last thing is probably my favorite by a long shot. Take different pieces of your life and put those pieces of your life on autopilot. It doesn’t have to be done in every aspect but taking a couple small aspects of your life that take your energy and time and putting them on auto-pilot can make a massive difference. The goal and reason is to take out small activities and eliminate unnecessary decision-making. Decision-making takes up a lot of energy. Even small decisions, if you are spending your time and energy on them, are draining you and leave you with little. It makes it more difficult for you to make a career change.

It could be a lot of things. It could be subscribing to easy meals and having them build you a menu for a week. It could be having your groceries delivered, hiring a housecleaner, or someone to mow your yard, or even leaving the most insignificant decisions for the end of the day versus the beginning. It could be as simple as deciding what you are going to wear and putting it by your bed so you don’t have to make the small decision in the morning. Have a routine where you do the same things in the same order every day. You are on routine rather than making decisions.

Another thing, and other ways to do it are if you regularly order or buy things have them delivered. Like groceries or hiring other people. If you don’t want to spend extra money you don’t really have to. Order from Amazon. It offers a lot and in some places they allow different types of subscriptions. When you have a subscription service you do it once and you don’t have to think about it again. You don’t have to make a decision and take the time and effort. If that is diapers, or whatever it is, take a look at the things you often replace and have to add to a list or make a decision. Remove it from your life.

Other ways that you can automate your life or put some of the pieces on auto-pilot might be creating systems for yourself within the framework of where you spend your time. It’s going to sound silly but one of the things Alyssa and I were experiencing when we came home every day was that our kids shoes were everywhere and it drove us insane. It was absurd because we were wasting so much mental energy on asking the kids to pick up or we were in a huff and stressed because it was the four hundred and seventy-fifth time we’ve asked them to pick up and they weren’t doing it. Instead we built a shoebox that attaches to the cabinet, that took little time to make, and it saves time and energy every day. The kids can now come in the door and they have a place to put their shoes. It’s easy for all of us and it’s hidden behind the door. We have eliminated that piece and essentially it is on auto-pilot. Building that in, literally in this case, allowed the elimination of all of that unnecessary energy being expended. That is what I’m talking about.

Another way you can do this is making the decision that for a short period of time you will eat roughly the same thing. You have three or four staple meals that will just be on the weekly menu. You won’t have to think about it for six or twelve weeks. I don’t want you eating the same thing for the rest of your life, but for a short period of time while you are in this marathon it can eliminate some of the headache and time and energy expended.

Another easy thing is to take a look at where you are spending time making small decisions or having little irritations. What are the things you walk through or by every day and you look at on the ground and have to decide, even unconsciously, to not do something. For example, we had a bunch of pictures that were sitting on the ground in front of the wall that they were going to be hung on. They sat there for a year plus. Every time we walked by we saw them on the ground and it triggered in the back of our mind that we needed to do something. We had to make the decision and continue reaffirming it that we weren’t doing anything with it today. Those little tiny, microcosm decisions are expending energy we don’t even realize. That is what I’m talking about. Make one decision to eliminate it so you don’t have the same irritation and decisions. It adds energy back to your life so you have more energy or willpower for the stuff that matters like making a career change.

Those are a couple examples on how can you start. First, walk around the spaces you spend the most time and determine what the irritations are and where you spend a lot of mental energy that with one decision or step you could eliminate the decision. It could be files sitting on the corner of your desk. Just put them in your drawers. Maybe you just need to keep them and don’t have to do any work on them. Just move them so you don’t keep looking at them and making the decision over and over to do nothing with them. Walk around your house or apartment or where you spend the majority of your time and determine if there is anything else like that. Where do you find you are having to make additional decisions during the week? Where do you spend the majority of your time? Alyssa and I lived in France for around four weeks and we noticed the French shop every day. Either going out to eat or shopping every day. It was a ton of fun but we realized how much decision-making power that that takes every day. Having to go to the store and decide on a meal every day which we had already put on auto-pilot before. It was really revealing on how much energy it took. We had a meal plan before with healthy food and on a specific routine. But in France we had to keep making the decisions and decide how to get there and to which store. It depletes a ton of mental energy.

That is the last step. Take a look at your life and see where you are expending that energy that you don’t need to. Think about it, if having to decide to mow your yard isn’t adding anything to your life go and get neighbor kids to mow it. I know sixty bucks a month can sound like a lot but if it frees you up to make the transition and maybe an additional ten thousand dollars a year then sixty bucks for three or four months to have someone else mow your yard is a no-brainer. Plus you enjoy life more and it is great to have someone else mow your yard unless you are really controlling on how your lawn looks. There are our three things.

I want you to pick one of these and start working on it. Layer just one into your life. Start the day by putting yourself first, making the mindset shift, and taking action, consume less things that slow you down, and take a few pieces of your life and put them on autopilot.

Hey, I really appreciate you being here and listening every week. We have more fun coming up on future episodes. We have exciting guests. I’m not going to tell you about them now but we’ve raised the bar through the help of our team. We have to thank Josh Rivers who makes everything happen behind the scenes with post-production and guest scheduling and everything else that happens. We have Kirby Verceles who has been on the show. She made a job switch that she loved before we snatched her up part-time to work on the podcast. She is a big part of making this happen and making it a better show. We appreciate you being here. If there is anything we can do for you let us know. We love your feedback on what you are enjoying and what you want to see.

If you haven’t already, go to happentoyourcareer.com. This is episode 172- happentoyourcareer/172 will get you everything and allow you to download the transcript so you can scan through it.

Thanks again.

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Figuring Out Your Life’s Best Work with Yuri Kruman

THIS IS NOT ABOUT ANYONE ELSE – IT’S JUST ABOUT YOU!

What is my life’s work?  It’s quite an intimidating thing to think about.

When you look back to your younger years, what do you remember wanting to be when you “grew up”?

Is that the job that you are currently doing?

Sometimes when we look back to those days of innocence, we find where our passion lies.

Today, our guest Yuri Kruman shares his personal experience in figuring out his own life’s work. From trying to please his family’s wishes on what they thought would bring him much success, to getting “kicked-out” of grad school, and finally to doing what it is that he is most passionate about in life.

Half of figuring out your own career transition is looking back at all of your life’s experiences and determining what you are naturally good at. What you’re known for doing really well by those people that surround you. 

Finding out what your natural role is will help you translate that natural ability to something else.

According to Yuri, reconnecting to your essence will help you understand what it is that you need to be doing with your life. You need to be looking back and identifying the patterns in your life to guide you to your life’s work.

If you’re wondering how to actually pull out the patterns from your past, don’t worry – we’ve got you covered.

Yuri recommends the following steps to find your own patterns to help you figure out your life’s work:

Step 1: Get away from your usual advisers

These are people that have a fixed image of who they think you are, also known as distractions. Your need to get a fresh set of eyes to look at you and your experiences with no context or extreme filters on the perception of who everyone else thinks your are.

Step 2: Find out if what you’re currently doing or what you are looking at doing in the future is a “good fit” or not

Ask others more questions from people that have been where you are or are currently where you want to be going. Get their take on your role and future plans.

Step 3: Talk to other people that are in similar situations as you or that have transitioned to what you’re looking to do

Get their story. Learn from their experience. Learn what their biggest takeaways were and get some of their recommendations to shortcut your way to a new career path.

Step 4: Give yourself time and space away from your “routine”

Most of the time, we all live in a world on auto-pilot. You need to find time or create the space you need to find the “real you.”

Who were you before society told you who you were?

ABOUT YURI KRUMAN

Yuri’s family immigrated from the Soviet Union through his mother’s career in science. Like many people, he went down the path that a lot parents groom their children to follow…that path to a “successful” career through higher-education. It was while Yuri was in school, that he realized he was just not great at learning pre-med and that he didn’t belong in the sciences. He knew his passion was in humanity. So, he switched to law school to at least walk away with a graduate degree to please his parents.

It was after his first job as a paralegal that he had another realization that we can all relate to…he couldn’t pretend to be good at something anymore, that he needed to work for something that he is passionate about.

This leads us to today. Yuri is now a trusted career, business and life coach – a professional strategist based in New York.

As Member of the Forbes Career Council and CEO / Founder of Master The Talk Career Success Consulting, he has helped clients of all career stages, industries and job markets around the world (and all around the U.S.) to chart a clear path in their careers, building confidence and understanding along the way.

He specializes in helping mid-career millennials build their own startups and continues to help them set the foundation for their transition to start their life’s best work.

EPISODE LINKS AND RESOURCES
Guest: Yuri Kruman
Relevant Links

Website: Master the Talk

Facebook: Master the Talk

Twitter: @MasterTheTalk

Relevant Resources

HTYC Career Transition Resources

Scott Barlow: Hey, welcome back to Happen To Your Career. I’m excited about the guest I have with me, particularly about his story. I have a ridiculous number of questions, like always, but some are off the wall questions. Before we get too far into it I want to say welcome to Happen To Your Career Yuri Kruman. How are you?

Yuri Kruman: Thank you for having me. I appreciate it and am excited to be on.

Scott Barlow: I’m excited to have you here. Let’s do this. You have this very interesting past that weaves, bobs, and ducks. I’m out of adjectives, verbs, and any other descriptions but you have an interesting past we will dig into. What do you do nowadays?

Yuri Kruman: A few things, I help mid-career millennials coming out of banks or health care organizations, or any large companies, to build their own startups from scratch. I help first time founders or help them transition to a start-up where they can do their life’s best work.

Scott Barlow: Perfect, it seems like you are in the right place and people can see why you are here to talk about this. We started talking before we recorded about the concept and how-to identify what could be a really great career move for you and how to go about that process. We will dig into that but I want to go way back first. This has been a long, arduous, crazy, roller coaster journey for you based on what I know. Where does this journey start?

Yuri Kruman: It starts in a small town in the Soviet Union, now Russia, called Pushchino, about 80 miles south of Moscow. I had academic parents. My father was a physicist my mom was a neuroscientist. We made it out, that was our big thing. The day Bill Clinton was elected we moved to Lexington, Kentucky.

Scott Barlow: When you say you made it out, give some explanation.

Yuri Kruman: The usual situation for a Soviet immigrant is to come as a refugee through Italy, Austria, Israel, and maybe have a chance to go to the United States. For my family it was different because my mom was a scientist. All the academic centers in the U.S. wanted cheap amazing labor. That is how we got here. She was a professor.

Scott Barlow: That was the ticket.

Yuri Kruman: Yes.

Scott Barlow: What happened then? I want to come back to that because I’m sure that was formative for you. What took place from there?

Yuri Kruman: We arrived and at first you have an initial shock, everyone is driving a car and we are the fools walking to the grocery in the winter. At the grocery there are all these fruits. They had no taste. It was an initial surprise about everything. In the Soviet Union we had this idea that the streets were paved in gold in the United States.

Scott Barlow: They aren’t?

Yuri Kruman: I’m still looking.

Scott Barlow: So you get here and there is no gold leafing on the streets and just asphalt.

Yuri Kruman: Yes and we are walking on it, but we are Russian so we have good clothing for the winter. I grew up there and had the Midwestern experience growing up with wholesome values. People will stab you in the back not in the front like in the Soviet Union. I’m glad I grew up in Kentucky and not New York. I see kids running around thinking they know and have seen everything. It’s tough. You want nature and playing as a kid. And not thinking about college when you are 8 years old. I’m happy to have that part of my life. But when I arrived in college it was a completely different level. I was a good student, but you had a bunch of kids from prep schools working crazy hours and it was tough to compete. I came to the University to do pre-med. I wasn’t a good pre-med student. I loved the subject matter but I really loved humanities. That was my thing but it took me a long time to figure that out. In true immigrant fashion I kept going because you need a graduate degree and my mom was a neuroscientist. If you aren’t going to do an MD do a PhD at least. That is how I arrived in NY.

Scott Barlow: You had a lot of pressures?

Yuri Kruman: The pressures were massive right from the beginning. We came to the U.S. to have a good job, not having to think about anti-Semitism, to have an opportunity to become something great, to make a lot of money, and to get the graduate degree because you have two parents with PhDs that are academics which means you have to get a PhD.

Scott Barlow: You are obligated at that point, probably more than one.

Yuri Kruman: The trouble is during the first year in graduate school, I came to New York with bright eyes and big lights and I was not really thrilled to be in the program. I liked the subject matter but being in a lab all the time is not for me. I created my first start-up while in graduate school. Instead of going to lab I created “juicyjews.com” my first start-up.

Scott Barlow: Perfect. As it should be called.

Yuri Kruman: I still have the t-shirts and will be happy to send one to you.

Scott Barlow: I need a picture of that logo.

Yuri Kruman: My mom said you are going to create an anti-Semitic conspiracy. “C’mon mom, we are past that.”

Scott Barlow: You do the startup you have the t-shirts, fantastic logo, and what happens?

Yuri Kruman: These guys in India built this website from my savings, making 24k a year. I don’t know what the hell I’m doing. I built a network of 14,000 people on Facebook. I created an algorithm to figure out who was Jewish, which was about 98% accurate. I launched with a massive spike in traffic and then it died. I learned that my registration process was too long. I got the bug. I knew I wanted to do my own company at some point down the road.

I spent a year in graduate school and they politely asked me to leave because it was not a good fit. It wasn’t what I should be doing; not my focus. I said thank you and went. I needed a graduate degree so I apply to law school and worked a year as a paralegal. It wasn’t so bad. I wanted to practice constitutional law. Yeah, law school, it’s going to be awesome. I started a year later and worked a lot of different internships. I did something on Fifth Avenue for legal consulting, which I don’t know what the hell is. She advised a lot of big politicians making $500 an hour or more advising on something called legal consulting. That was my first experience. Then I started writing a novel mid-way through law school.

That is one of the things I have done. It took me about 7 years to do it. It got finished because I met my then girlfriend, now wife. She said either you finish it or I’m out of here.

Scott Barlow: Tell me about that. I knew you had wrote a couple novels but I didn’t realize that one took 7 years to finish. What was going on? What was the hold up?

Yuri Kruman: Between a quarter million in law school debt, to graduating in the single worse job market of all time in the last few generations; then there is the realization that I really should not be doing law. It is not what I love. I can’t do document review for the next 5 to 6 years. Frankly I wasn’t a very good student. It’s another factor. It’s a running theme. When I’m not into something it is hard for me to pretend. It took me a very long time to figure out that I needed to do something I’m passionate about. That is why I ended up doing coaching. I’ve been teaching and coaching my whole life. Telling people here is what you need to get healthier, here is a tool, or a strategy. I’ve always been doing that but didn’t think it would pay. Maybe when I was more established I would teach in a university.

Scott Barlow: The someday syndrome.

Yuri Kruman: Someday, some PhD or PhD-like scenario.

Scott Barlow: Let me ask you about a couple of these things. Not to dovetail too far but I’m really curious about some of the pieces that lead up to it. First, I heard you say that they politely asked me to leave. First of all what did that look like, I’m guessing it didn’t feel great, but how did it go down? What was it like?

Yuri Kruman: It was traumatic. It wasn’t because they asked me to leave, but because my mom was seeing my declining grades. In high school I was a good student. In college the other people were running circles around me. My grades are sliding down and down and I get to graduate school and think it’s my salvation and I mess it up. It’s a massive let down to my mom who was hoping to have me as a colleague. I’m doing research for six summers, some with her. It was this terrible feeling that Iet my mom down of all people

Scott Barlow: This is interesting though. Because I think it happens to a lot of people. Not that everyone’s mom is expecting to have them as a colleague, but to some degree many parents have hopes and expectations, whether they mean to or not, that get passed on or moved to our hopes and expectations. We have a tendency to pull those into ourselves and create our own web of what we should do.

How did you work through that because clearly you were in that web of expectations? Then all of that disappointment that we force on ourselves.

Yuri Kruman: Mostly I don’t know that I worked through it for a long time. I bottled it up. I’ve thought a lot about this. I have had a lot of Soviet people that are my clients. If they aren’t Soviets they were born to Soviet parents. You want to go through hard experiences to gain credibility in the eyes of your parents and grandparents because they went through Hitler, Stalin, discrimination at every level at the university, pursuits and the Soviet Union that was hell. It’s almost like you have to weather your own passage to gain credibility. Like I have street cred. I’m part of it.

Scott Barlow: Other than just that problem of Facebook.

Yuri Kruman: It’s a martyr’s complex. It’s a strong thing people go through. Their parents might be accomplished. They’ve gone through absolute hell. You feel like you are far above it and don’t know your value in the world because you haven’t seen the misery. It weighs on you for a long time until something either happens: trauma or inspiration, or something else forces you to caste it off. There is nothing in your life, in this world that has to make you suffer or continue suffering just because you have credibility. That is nonsense.

Scott Barlow: It is self-induced to some degree. Maybe not a first but eventually. How did you caste it off? Was there a single event? What is the first time you remember casting it off?

Yuri Kruman: It’s a series of events. Put yourself in this scenario. You just finished law school, you know you don’t want to practice law and it isn’t for you. You need to pay bills - you have a quarter million in debt. I had to move back home with mom for about 2 months. I couldn’t do longer than that. You become the little boy again. It’s not the chores, it’s you have your own worldview. You can’t go back. I moved back to New York and I lived between two friends, one that is getting married this weekend in Israel. I moved back and I get a job at a hedge fund. It’s a project not a job. My girlfriend of 4 1/2 years just left me and I met my current wife, shout out to her sitting right here. We met at that time and went on a date. A girl from Morocco. She is an engineer and French. We were engaged after 2 months. We didn’t have a place to live. Both of us lived with friends. We were having a drink and I get an email. One of our friends was moving, getting married, and had an apartment. We discussed it and said it was nuts, we both need a place to live how about we move in together. She wanted to ask her mom and grandma and they said yes miraculously. We moved in to this great apartment next to a university. It was a sublet. Two weeks later I went to get a ring. It was serious let’s do it. She miraculously said yes. She is shaking her head like my god.

Scott Barlow: This is the real secret about how we get the true story. We sit the other people right alongside to fact check on the spot.

Yuri Kruman: That’s right. I tell my story very gladly for my clients because that is the real stuff. It’s not cryptic. It’s so crazy that it could only happen in real life.

The bottom line is I’m with massive debt on my back. I don’t know how to manage my finances. I’m working projects here and there. Bad stuff. Pressure from having a wife or someone you are going to marry. She learns what is going on and it’s terrible. It almost broke us apart. We stuck it out and I had to start figuring out how to manage debt and revenue. Eventually I got to a point where I got so sick of my own nonsense. I didn’t have anything together. I wasn’t growing in the right direction. It wasn’t a good situation.

At that point I decided I had to do something and change my life. It’s really the feeling of being sick of myself and my own nonsense that spurred me to read guys like Tim Ferriss, James Altucher, and Ramit Sethi. To research how people have overcome all of these issues. I knew I wasn’t the first. I had to realize that others have been through all these things. That is the hardest when you have a martyr complex. I need the street cred and to suffer. When you get out of that you see light and see people have solved the problems. Follow their path because they are successful. That was the key. It wasn’t overnight, not even two or three years. It is a process that took a long time to see. I’m tired of going between projects and having gaps where I’m unemployed, freaking out, how am I going to support my family. I kept working for start-ups for peanuts hoping the equity someday would be worth something. It’s not a great scenario.

This dovetails into this last year. I’m going to write a book about it. All of that times three. Last April our second daughter was born. We learned that she has Retinoblastoma which is cancer of the retina. You can imagine. All of this with the startup not working. There is that plus a sick kid. We are talking about stage 3. It wasn’t metastasis. Thank god. We scatter and figure out how to treat this. We are lucky to be in New York because the best specialist is here. We pray and get things together. I decide I need to be at home to take care of her.

I decide to start my own business. I got on the muse and I see I’m getting good results for my clients. I really love it and I’m good at it. The business coming together with law, finance, and my love of teaching. It is my story, who I am. I was meant to go through all of this craziness to help other people. At one point everything comes together and most things make sense. That is how my company came about. That is how I am where I am today. Because I finally realized after eleven years of struggle and craziness and asking where am I going, who I am, and what am I meant to do. It coalesced into something I’m connected to. It’s my four pillars.

Scott Barlow: I would love to have you describe those to our listeners. HTYC-ers will benefit greatly from talking through those. I love talking about this stuff. We could talk 9-10 hours straight on this. Four pillars. What if I’m in the situation that most HTYC-ers are where they are looking at making the career change, identifying what they should be doing, and have similar experiences to you where it isn’t working? I’m going this direction because of someone else’s expectation and I know it isn’t right, but what then?

Yuri Kruman: There are four keys to this puzzle. It’s not that you do this and everything magically opens up.

Scott Barlow: No magic beans?

Yuri Kruman: It lifts a burden. You are used to thinking a certain way but you turn it around. It’s your show. Not their rules, not their terms. You are driving the process.

The first pillar is life mission. This is when you wake up in the morning and you check Facebook and get the nonsense out of the way and you start thinking about what you really want to work on. You don’t have to worry about money, track record, what others think. If you could do anything in this world what do you try to solve? Curing cancer, creating a new iPhone, building something that doesn’t exist, improving something? What is it?

Second is values. Looking at your circle of friends and family what is it you like about them that you would want in your co-workers and colleagues? A lot of us roll our eyes, cynically and say it’s my work place. I deal with these people on a daily basis and my comfort zone is at home. Those people determine the quality of your work. If your boss is a micro-manager or your colleagues don’t hold up their end you won’t last there long if they don’t see it in the same way.

Third is outcomes. What do you like to do for other people? We are talking, not about deliverables or particular role or title or industry, but if you found yourself in a situation to help someone else how can you help them? Is it choosing to improve their health, choosing to help them organize finances, distress, make their business process cheaper better faster. What do you always find yourself doing for others?

Fourth is roles. Not title, job, responsibilities, but where do you fit on the spectrum of people in an organization. Any organization, it may be the visionary leader who is always evangelizing about the most important problem in the world saying we need to increase access to HIV drugs in sub-Saharan Africa, or increase information through a better iPhone.

Or you might be the person who says I do not care about mambo jumbo. Let’s just get sh*t done. Get it done on time and under budget. That is the CEO.

You might be the in-house expert on economics. An academic safe haven. You are they person to whom everyone else comes for expertise or analysis on a narrow subject. You might be the caretaker. You help everyone else do their life’s best work by providing material and support. There are other roles but those are the main ones I’ve encountered.

Scott Barlow: Let me ask you about that. I get e-mail after e-mail and we talk to our students and clients and listeners of this show. We get constant questions about roles. I want to clarify this and what you mean when you say roles. I think people jump to job title, and other things like that. What do you mean when you really say role and more importantly how should they categorize themselves or should they when talking about role? Everyone wants to do that.

Yuri Kruman: It is important to understand role is not about title or the job you have. It’s not about your career per se. It is about the situations in your life that you encounter - there tends to be a pattern of how you behave, how you help other people, what kinds of responsibilities you find yourself taking to help others. It may be a volunteer activity.

Someone says “hey, Scott listen I know you are the best person to solve this problem and you are the most motivated.” What is that? Not from work, not your boss, but just from a friend you choose to spend your time with. For example, they know you are the person that is good at researching and analyzing the local foody scene. You will have that hot restaurant to recommend. They always come to you because you are the “curator”. You research, analyze, and give that deliverable of this is the place to go.

How do I monetize that? I don’t know. I can’t be a restaurant analyst. Wrong!

Think of it in those terms. You don’t have to work in the restaurant industry or be an analyst for a newspaper or bank. But you know your comfort zone is in filtering and curating a lot of information for others to use. Think about the context which you can do that on a daily basis or regular basis. That is your natural role in any situation which also means your organization and workplace.

Scott Barlow: This is really interesting and I’d love to keep digging into this because I find this to be quite possibly the number one challenge that people experience. They have a really hard time wrapping their head around, if this is my natural playing role in many areas of my life how does it translate into something else? That is the part because there are so many variables that gets overwhelming. How do you help them understand the context you mentioned and help them break it apart so they can see it in a more obvious way versus getting lost for example, in the “I make people laugh so I should be a comedian?”

Yuri Kruman: Here is how I approach this. When people say I’m dazed and confused I have them do the four pillars. I should mention a couple other things. Look at founding stories which is one of the keys, When you look at high school you usually had an idea of I want to be x, not knowing the context but knowing it was something you really wanted to do. It’s often based on your personality, who you are, your aspirations, and how you want to help others. That innocence might be key to the process.

How do I help people go from the four pillars to a title? I focus on two components, psychology and language. I’ve been trying to understand myself and other people to get my message across since I was a kid and I’ve done many different things in my career and life. I’ve met so many different people and worked from janitor to CEO and back. My life experiences have set me up well to read people and understand their motivations. Where do they come from so I can to get them to tell me the founding stories? Why did they go into what they went into and how to use that innocent view to reconnect to their essence? They can then say I need to do this in my job in some form or fashion. A lot of it is a science. Not a personality test but looking back at what I know from my background and experience, plus clients, I have helped and identify patterns. There are always patterns in how people see the world and what they should do.

There are people on one side that are quantitative: How can they organize this? It’s the engineer, coder, person who sees things in matrices and progressions, parallels, etc. You have others on the other side that see nuance. Psychology, language, humanities. It doesn’t mean that there aren’t people with both components but one is usually more predominant than the other. That dominance needs examined. I was always dominant with math and science on paper. I wanted to be pre-med and go in PhD programs. I was better at humanities. It should have been a sign to do something with humanities but I ignored it. I had external factors telling me to not go for what I’m stronger in and to not focus on it because I am better at it. I think about it all the time. Not neuroscience or whatever on the math side. Going through the process, identifying patterns, helping clients focus on the essence, and understanding what it looks like in a title and industry, and I give them context.

Maybe you are funny and want to be a comedian but it might not pay unless you are really committed. But what in your job gets you to talk to people and lower their barriers? Maybe it is selling. They never thought about it. It’s the threads we pull out, that’s how we find out what they like to do on their comfort level when they aren’t thinking about their brand and in technical terms.

Scott Barlow: What can they do if they don’t have a Yuri right in front of them? They could call Yuri but if they want to attempt this for themselves, what can they do to pull out some of the patterns. I love that, there is always a pattern. I totally agree that the same way you might go to a mechanic to fix your car versus trying to do it yourself you might have someone help that can find the patterns. What would you advise someone to do if they want to attempt to find the patterns on their own?

Yuri Kruman: The simplest thing you can do is two-fold:

1) Get away from your usual context. This is the one thing I advise my clients to do. Get away from parents friends, clients, and advisers. Anyone you associate with that stereotypes you: “my little boy, or the lazy schmuck that doesn’t finish is spreadsheets on time.” People that deal with us on a regular basis have a fixed image of who we are and what we are capable of. That layer keeps us from breaking through when going through a deep career exploration, pillars, and personality tests. You need to go to a different part of town, coffee shop, away from anyone and everyone that can recall the image you have of yourself through their eyes. It’s all the external filters that we put on throughout the day by necessity because we have to function and respond to peoples requests. Get away and go through the process alone with no distractions and see what comes out.

Do it with a pen and paper because your brain works fundamentally different than using a computer. When you bring out your fears and negative scripts and write them down on paper it’s like you get them out of your system. You acknowledge they are real and they affect you less. Once it’s on paper it becomes real. It becomes tangible, something to focus on and build upon. That is the number one thing.

2) The easiest thing you can do if it is a good fit short of going and spending your time doing it is talking to people who have been through similar transformations. If you want to go from working in a bank to working in a health technology startup talk to people who have made the transition. Find them on LinkedIn and through networks and get them to tell you their story. What do I do all day in my work besides the practical counseling? I tell my story because I will always find something to help the person see themselves in new light. That’s the number one most important thing.

Scott Barlow: I love a couple things you said. I liked what you were talking about in getting away. I interpreted that as giving yourself the time and space in a different place, context, and area, even physical, to get to new conclusions rather than your old mold of what it must mean. I love that. I don’t think we do that even though we know we should. We don’t understand the benefit of giving ourselves the time and space.

Yuri Kruman: Let me re-frame it. Imagine you are addicted to cigarettes. What you are really addicted to is nicotine, right? But it’s context. You smoke with the same people every day and you talk to them in a different way than nonsmoking coworkers. It’s the physical context. The time and space you engage in the same behaviors over and over that you need to break. It’s the physical component of getting away from the usual place, home, work, etc. It opens up parts that you forgotten. You are more than a friend, a son, a colleague, but you forgot because you are pressured by bills, bosses, track records, and fears. They add up.

Scott Barlow: Absolutely love that. The other thing I enjoyed that a lot people don’t realize or forget, but is valuable in this process, is pen and paper. For example, they can’t see it but I’m literally writing on an iPad with a pen, not because iPads are great but it is as close as I can get to duplicating the physiological thoughts meet pen and paper process. You can get places you couldn’t before. It helps me even in our conversation and if I was typing it wouldn’t be the same. Big take away there.

A question for you to pull this together and wrap some of it up. For people who are in this place and want to go through these four pillars and do some of this what would you say is one of the biggest things to get started? What is the one parting piece of advice? We have more than a few people in this situation.

Yuri Kruman: I mentioned that in my process of coming to terms of who I am, my situation and all the components, the foundational piece was becoming sick of engaging in the same behaviors and contexts. I wanted to become better. I wanted to transcend the crap around me. That was the number one thing that forced me to get out of the martyr’s complex and gloom and doom and go do something. The way you do that is go and learn from people who have already jumped from the dark to the light. How have they done it? What concrete techniques and strategies have they used? What do they recommend? What is their story? What can you take away from the stories? Reap as many as you can. Form a fuller picture in your mind of what applies to you and go do something.

If you have the money and time take a coach because they are there to guide you and short circuit the dark alleys and trial and error if they are a good coach. If they aren’t good you will be there for a while.

That is the number one thing whether you take a coach you must become sick of your own crap in order to change. That is the number one take away if there is one. When you are that point choose to say no to the BS to say no to people not improving your life, that want to occupy your time and provide no value. Say no, that is from James Altucher. Maybe you’ve read it. He is one of my favorites and has been influential in my life. That alone, saying no consistently, to control your life, your message, and branding, and how you see the world. Say no.

Scott Barlow: I really appreciate it very much, you taking and making the time to come on the show and telling your story. I absolutely love this. Some of the pieces are incredibly valuable. I have a notepad filled with all of these things as well. I want to urge people to go on the website happentoyourcareer.com/171 and find everything we talked about. How can they get in touch with you and find out more?

Yuri Kruman: Go to my website MasterTheTalk.com. Everything is there.

Scott Barlow: Head on over there. I’ve been on it. Great website. Yuri does a variety of things. We just scratched the surface. Thank you so much. I do really appreciate it. We’ll see you next time.

Yuri Kruman: With pleasure. Thank you for having me on. It’s been a great hour. I appreciate your time.

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Rewiring Your Mindset for Success with Regan Hillyer

GIVE YOURSELF PERMISSION TO DREAM. GIVE YOURSELF PERMISSION TO ASK FOR WHAT YOU WANT.

Question: What is your definition of success?

Is it the size of your paycheck?

Enjoying what you do?

Is it the impact you make in other people’s lives?

Maybe it is having the freedom to start and leave work whenever you please?

Whatever your definition of success is, do you know how you’re going to achieve it?

Some people may have an idea, but most of us don’t.

Most of us follow the system and hope to progress accordingly.

But, is that really the most efficient way to achieve the success we have in mind?

Probably not.

That’s kind of where Regan Hillyer found herself after following the systematic path of going to school to major in architecture and being asked to look into her future as an architect 20 years into her career. She was not happy about what she saw in her future, so she changed her path.

At the time, Regan wasn’t even sure where she saw herself to achieve this “success” everyone put so much pressure on.

She did a lot of soul-searching and decided to be proactive about her future by working on herself first. She began rewiring her mindset to succeed. Regan actively set goals and visualized her successful future to travel while working towards her goal to make millions. Many talk about this as developing a success mindset.

Regan now helps others with personal development by teaching them how to set their own “success mindset” to build their online empire with their personal brand.

In the podcast, and below, Regan shares how to be more proactive about your success by incorporating a more solid way to realize your vision of success.

STEPS TO DEVELOPING A SUCCESS MINDSET:

  1. Get clear on your unfiltered vision
    • Begin journaling
    • If you are more visual, create a vision board of your goals and measurements of success
    • If audio is a better way for you to realize your visions, have a conversation about it and record it
  2. Give yourself permission to dream
  3. Ask yourself:
    • Who you need to become to manifest your vision?
    • Where is your focus?
    • What resistance..fears…limitations do you have that is stopping you from achieving your vision?
    • What do you need to believe?
      • Belief system is necessary to manifest your dreams
    • What would the higher-version of you do to make your dream happen faster – action step
    • Intentional and aligned with your vision
  4.  Once you are clear on what you want and where you see yourself, become the person you need to be to achieve those goals

ABOUT REGAN HILLYER

Regan is a successful serial entrepreneur, speaker, and author of the new bestselling book, Be Your Brand.
She began her career at a personal development company, speaking on stage almost every week – until she got burned out and decided to make a big change.

Today, Regan is all about helping artists, leaders, creators, and entrepreneurs with their success mindset and building an “online empire” through creating a successful personal brand.

Regan continues to help her clients shift their reality and unleash their true message and communicate it effectively, so they can build a powerful personal brand that is in alignment with their values.t he invested in this business of buying businesses.

In the past 16 years, Ace has purchased over 40 businesses and discovered unique strategies to finance businesses and continues to help other people leverage those same strategies.

EPISODE LINKS AND RESOURCES
Guest: Regan Hillyer
Relevant Links

www.reganhillyer.com

Social Media

Regan on Facebook

Twitter: @ReganHillyer

Resources

The Ultimate Guide to Finding a Career that Fits You

The Ultimate Guide to Using Your Strengths to Get Hired

Scott Barlow: Welcome back to Happen To Your Career. I am so excited to have our guest on today. She has a really interesting story and background. Her journey is one you all can learn from and will be excited for. Regan how are you?

Regan Hillyer: Hey Scott I’m awesome. Thank you.

Scott Barlow: Thanks for making the time and coming on to talk to us. I appreciate it.

Regan Hillyer: Pleasure. It’s great to be here.

Scott Barlow: Just to get us started. How do you tell people what you do when faced with that question? How do you quantify it?

Regan Hillyer: I guess it depends on who I am talking to. Generally I let people know I do two cool things. First, I help people with their success mindsets. I help them shift their reality from within. And second, I help artists, leaders, and creators unleash and monetize. I help them create the life they truly desire around that.

Scott Barlow: That sounds awesome and right in line with what I know many HTYC-ers are excited about to. You haven’t always done that

Regan Hillyer: Correct.

Scott Barlow: I’d love to talk to you about what that journey looked like. Where did this start for you?

Regan Hillyer: I grew up in an amazing family in Auckland, New Zealand. I was told I had to follow the system and go to school, work hard, and get good grades. I did that then went to university which was expected. I was studying architecture because I had no idea what I wanted to do with my life.

For me my journey kicked off in a university lecture. The lecturer said “welcome future architects, I want you to picture your future twenty years out from now. What is it like to be an architect?” I started visualizing it and I felt sick to my stomach with what I saw. I knew that even though I was good at it and people were telling me I would be the best architect, at my core I knew that it wasn’t right and what I was put here to do in the world. I made a decision then that I wasn’t going to follow that path and be an architect.

I proudly told my dad and he said I will support anything you want to do that will make you happy, but what are you going to do? I remember there was silence on the phone and said just give me some time to figure that part out. That is what threw me into personal development and soul searching at a young age. Why am I here, what is life about, what is my purpose, how do I help people and make an impact and live a great lifestyle?

I threw myself into doing everything: wealth creation, investing in properties, currency trading, sales, marketing. I did everything people told me to do. Investing money I didn’t have, showing up, and being committed, but nothing clicked. I told one of my mentors, when I was frustrated that I’m not cut out for this or meant to be successful. He said “Regan, the thing is you have it backwards. You are pouring all your time, energy, and money into figuring out strategies to make it work and you need to work on you and rewire yourself to succeed. Change your mindset and understand how successful people think then everything will shift.” That’s how I got into coaching and personal development and figuring it out organically for myself.

Scott Barlow: So what I heard is it is your dads fault for asking the parental type questions like what are you going to do. That is really interesting because I heard you say maybe I’m not meant to be successful. I’m curious, what is your definition of success in the first place and how has it evolved?

Regan Hillyer: Success for me, it’s different for everyone, but for me it’s having the freedom to do what I want, on my terms, with who I want, in what way I choose for it to look like; ultimate freedom. Right now it is centered around impact and answering big questions on how to increase my impact and shift that to a new level each day. It definitely didn’t start there. At first it was about making money and doing something I enjoyed and having time and freedom around that.

Scott Barlow: It seems to start that way for so many people. I haven’t met many people, a few, but not many, that started out with a different definition of success. For so many people it seems to be around power, status, or money of some variety to start with.

Completely different question. I heard you say that you were experimenting with all these things and doing a lot of things. Did that help you in anyway? Aside from advice and conversations along the way. Was it helpful to be involved in so many things?

Regan Hillyer: Yes. I believe it was all perfect and happened for a reason and I needed to live that experience to be where I am right now. I am grateful for it. Was there a faster way? Most likely. But I’m grateful for the experience. Once I started rewiring my mindset and went deep into success psychology that is when the strategies started making sense. I went back to what I’d learned and applied them looking at the world through different glasses. It was all for a reason and I believe I had value out of everything that I did in the long run.

Scott Barlow: What is an example of something that didn’t maybe need to happen that you now see you could have avoided or learned the lesson differently?

Regan Hillyer: I thought I would learn to invest in property as it’s an amazing way to set up success. I went really deep only to find out I wasn’t really passionate about property, but I kept forcing it. I didn’t even have capital but I was set on learning on how to do it. After I rewired my mindset and learned success principles and about successful people I figured out about my passions and what I wanted to create. It was easier to find a property mentor to tell me what to do. Which is how I invest now. I have a mentor I work with on a close basis and that works well and I don’t need to know the whole strategy. At the time I thought I needed to know.

Scott Barlow: I find that is the case for a lot of things. If you want to shortcut the process you can find people who assist because they have already done that. Where else have you done that approach within your life?

Regan Hillyer: Once I figured out that it was a thing I started doing it everywhere. If I’m looking to do anything I have no interest in trying to figure it out myself. The fastest way to get from where I am to where I want is to find someone who has done it before or helps people do it. I do it in every area. For example, if wanted to run a marathon, and never had, I wouldn’t go online and download an eBook and run every day. I would find someone who trains people for marathons and hire them and work with them. It’s that simple because it will accelerate the process.

Scott Barlow: That is interesting. You’ve mentioned mindset, just to kick it off I’m curious what you feel has to take place to transfer or change that mindset? If you asked me 8 years ago, thinking about hiring a running coach or coaches for anything - business coaches, marriage coaches, or sought out mentors I would not have done that. I’m curious about which steps people have to go through. It never seems to be just a flip the switch - I get it and start to hire people.

Regan Hillyer: You can do what I do and go through trial and error and frustration figuring it out yourself only to realize there is a faster way. One of the things that I recommend if you are unsure if it will work, is go and study successful people. Look at not just what they are doing now but how did they get there. Who surrounds them? Who has been beside them to accelerate them to where they are? No one successful is self-made. Everyone is an accumulation of information, strategies, and people they’ve had intentionally beside them.

Scott Barlow: Give me an example of where you’ve done that early on? Maybe not now with your current business because I think it’s easier for people who have already been through that transition and are on the other side of the mindset to be able to articulate what is happening now, but as you were changing and studying the successful people where did it happen?

Regan Hillyer: One of the first mentors I worked with was someone from Australia. I was in New Zealand and it was a big deal to travel to Australia. I immersed myself around this one person who is a self-made multi-millionaire. If I wanted results like that I needed to be closer to that person. I showed up at the events and got to know him and his team better. One thing I did was made a commitment to get closer to them and understand his mindset and how he created this. It was half a million dollars to hire him for mentoring and I did not have access to that. I got creative, to see how I could get closer. He had an education seminar company. I emailed them and offered to work for them for free for a month. I’d never had a job in my life. I’d always done my own thing. I had to park my ego and swallow my pride and work for someone and get in their environment and get to know their team better. At first they said there were no positions. I said I’d work for free just let me through the door. They put me in a sales role. I said if I’m good at the end of the month you can keep me and pay me. I was with them for about 8 months and learned so much. I learned how a successful education company runs. It was getting closer to the mentor and getting invited socially and going on lunch breaks. It was environment. It didn’t cost me anything for coaching or mentoring. I was creative and committed.

Scott Barlow: The cost was time. There are a couple things I love. First, the intentionality that you wanted to do it. And second saying it’s not possible to drop a half million so how can I do it? That’s the line of questioning that can be effective.

Let me ask, it seems like it’s a big deal when you confuse an Australian with a New Zealander? Is that a thing?

Regan Hillyer: It’s more of a big deal for a New Zealander.

Scott Barlow: I’m with my family putting together a trip in December of next year. Selfish question but where should I go in New Zealand? What are one or two things I have to see?

Regan Hillyer: Depends what you are after. It has everything: Surf, hiking, incredible beaches, mountains, and the jungle. One of the top places I would go is Queenstown. It is amazing and world class with scenery. Everyone is in love with it.

Scott Barlow: I’m putting it in Evernote.We are trying to do a month to six week trip each year toward the end of the year. This is where I think we are heading next: Australia and New Zealand. Total dovetail, now less selfish questions.

If someone is thinking about this in terms of pursuing a business for themselves for the first time, and they are trying to grasp, “what is success for me?” What advice would you give them? Reach a few years back.

Regan Hillyer: I think one of the biggest things to get clear on is your vision and where you are heading. There are no right or wrong answers. What are you looking to create and what life do you want? I love to journal. You can journal, visualize, or meditate. I like to ask if I was to create a big picture vision/reality/a big life for the future and remove any questioning on how to do it, whether it’s too big, etc. If I park all of that, what would I actually ask for or want? What do I want to create? In every area of your life. So many people don’t actually get what they want in life because they are too scared to stand up and ask for it and declare it. That is one of the key things: get really clear on where you want to go.

Scott Barlow: Aside form journaling are there other ways to do it?

Regan Hillyer: You can journal. A lot of people like to visualize. A lot of clients don’t like writing. They are amazing at closing their eyes and getting creative visualizing it. If you would rather talk about it you can have a conversation about it with someone and record it. Grab your iPhone and hit voice memo and record in your phone. Talk as though it is done. Start with, I’m excited it’s such and such year and this is what is going on. Just record it so you can hear it back

Scott Barlow: There are a couple ways to go about this. I am curious where this has been really helpful for you? I’m a huge fan of visualizing and it’s been helpful in my life. Where has it been helpful to you?

Regan Hillyer: It’s been a part of me the whole way. It’s one of the first things I started doing and giving myself permission to dream and to ask for what I actually wanted. I made my first million when I was 24 years old but I wrote that down five years before that. If I wasn’t doing that it wouldn’t have happened. It’s been with me every step of the way in every area of my life. I still write out my big picture reality and vision daily and write what I’m excited about now. It’s a fundamental.

Scott Barlow: How do you do that on a daily basis? My routines have changed over the years and I’ve been thinking about this and what my every morning looks like. For you, what does that look like now?

Regan Hillyer: It varies depending on the time you have available. In an ideal day, if I have an hour to dedicate, that is bliss. I start out asking myself just what I shared. If I’m creating a big picture reality what would be going on? I write it out as though it is done. Not in the future, but write like I am so happy that I have done this or that. My mindset is clicking with it already happening.

The next step is asking myself who I need to become to manifest that. I believe you can’t manifest it unless you are that version. People think I can’t wait to make millions, but you have to be the millionaire first and the money will show up. Ask what am I about? What am I focusing on? What do I tolerate and not? How do I walk?

The third thing is what resistance and fear is going on right now? What blocks do I have? Bring awareness to that. Write it down.

Step four is digging into what you need to believe for it to manifest right now. If your belief system isn’t in alignment with what you want to create you will take a lot of action but not manifest it. I wrote out powerful beliefs: I believe I am a powerful entrepreneur. I believe that I manifest everything I desire with ease and grace and I write them daily.

The last step which is critical is I ask myself if this were done and there was no question what would the higher version of me be doing right now for this to happen faster. I write action items. I’d call this person, go to this interview, pitch to this podcast, etc. You start getting your action you need to take in life and business. When you act on those items it means it is intentional and aligned with creating your vision you aren’t just busy every day.

Scott Barlow: I love that, particularly the beliefs question. That is not something I ask myself on a regular basis and I love that. I think that HTYC-ers will love that. I am curious, based on the way you run your business do you attract a lot of people that are really interested in the lifestyle business concept?

Regan Hillyer: Yes. I think everyone pretty much is driven by having an amazing lifestyle. They see me jumping all over the world. Even in the education business we have a team of over 30 people working from laptops and doing it the amazing lifestyle way. I’m a beacon of light to show it is possible and you can do it on your terms easily. A lot of people focus on this.

Scott Barlow: I’m curious because there are many connotations, what do people not realize when they are enamored with the thought of being able to travel? For our business we can do that and I love being able to have the freedom to do that but I’m curious what are people not thinking about?

Regan Hillyer: That’s a great question.

Scott Barlow: When they are falling in love with the outward piece.

Regan Hillyer: There are a few things. First, if you are looking to create the lifestyle you have to decide to go with it. For example, when I first went location free or digital nomad, I didn’t first create and make it work and then went location free. I went location free first and put myself in a position where I was forced to figure it out and make it work or I’d have to go back.

First decide. One of the key things once you are in it and living it, that people aren’t aware of but have to figure out, is that it is important to create boundaries. It is easy when you are working for home or traveling and working to blur it all in to one. It’s not necessarily bad but it can be challenging. I’ve found a lot of freedom going about my day responding to emails and client calls and realized I could do it from bed. I literally went into this place where I thought I should stay in bed all day and do it. But why was I feeling drained and can’t relax? Because I was still in work mode. It seems so obvious and simple but even putting clear boundaries on places where I relax and work makes a difference. Whether it’s in other places or in your own home. It’s important or you blur it and it can backfire.

Scott Barlow: I can vouch for that. It hasn’t bene as long for me since I’ve made the jump but as we’ve been traveling - and I have little kids, three that are following along - it’s incredibly difficult to work in the same place whether it’s Airbnb or a hotel. So I’ve had to, on a suggestion from a friend, go get a working space so I can differentiate.

Regan Hillyer: Exactly. I do that too. Even when I’m in Los Angeles I have a place that is a bit of a base for me. Some nights if I want to write a lot I will leave and go to a beautiful bar in Hollywood and I’ll play into that vibe with my laptop. Then I can go home and relax. I think it’s important to have the different environments.

Scott Barlow: I haven’t figured out how to be as productive when I’m not in a home base. Another selfish question? I’ve been struggling to figure that one out and routine. What would you advise? What has worked for you to get over that?

Regan Hillyer: I think there are a lot of different things. I would make sure that first any action you take is aligned and intentional. To be honest I have a lot going on and multiple business and I travel a lot. I live an amazing lifestyle with fun and down time. I do what I want, but it doesn’t mean I’m not working hard. I’m working intentionally. That comes from the daily mindset practice. Really taking the last step and saying what would the version of me be doing right now to move forward? It may only be three things to do that day but they are more powerful than doing 50 things you don’t really need to do. It’s being really intentional and coming from the space making sure you are committed and getting it done. Daily non-negotiables. At one o’clock in the morning I may know I haven’t done two of them and I will do them. I’m very disciplined.

Scott Barlow: Love it and appreciate it. For everybody else that wants to find out more about you or your business or anything else where can they go and do that? How can they get more Regan?

Regan Hillyer: If you go to reganhillyer.com you will see a lot there and you can subscribe to my email list. I send out a lot amazing content on a daily basis. I’m active on all social media platforms. Anywhere you love to hang out it is all under Regan Hillyer. Check out the content and connect and let me know you came from this podcast.

Scott Barlow: Thank you for taking the time. This has been good, selfishly good.

Regan Hillyer: It’s awesome. You are so welcome.

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